| Sep 6, 2007 @ 5:07 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
Ulimaroa
Posts: 461
|
Mistake #1: Searching for the Right Dating Site
If a girlfriend told you that her biggest problem in losing weight was that she couldn't find the right gym, you'd probably shake your head. You know that it's not the gym but your friend's dedication to using the gym that makes all the difference. Yet you may think that you can cure your dating blues just by choosing the right website. Newsflash: ANY website with lots of single men can be the right website; your success is ultimately determined by how you use that site.
You can use Yahoo! to search all day long to find a place that is populated with tall, honest, successful men. But at the end of the day, it's not the site that will determine your fate. It's you. The question is how committed you are to turning yourself into a success story.
Mistake #2: Signing Up for a One-Month Subscription
Even though you know how difficult it is to find a soul mate, you signed up for a one-month subscription on a dating site. One month! You're going to fall in love before you get your next phone bill! Clearly, you've created an unrealistic timetable. So while you may not want to date online forever, you're shortchanging yourself if you act as if you have only 30 days to find a husband.
Remind yourself why you started dating online -- it's hard to meet people in real life.
And quitting is not an option.
Mistake #3: Trying to Stop the "Wrong" Men From Writing to You
Have you ever had a profile that just seemed to attract all the wrong men? You want a man who is attractive, successful and honest, and all you get are ugly unemployed guys who lie about their height. So, to stop them from wasting your time, you decide to spell it out in your profile: "If you're over the age of 50, live in another state, or have a substance abuse problem, don't even bother writing". And yet they STILL keep on contacting you! What can you possibly do to stop these annoying men who can't read?
Nothing. Ignore them. But don't try to stop them. After all, if you have any standards, most of your emails are going to be from the "wrong" guys. That's okay. They're allowed to write to you. And you're allowed to delete their email. As a quality woman, you're going to get all sorts of men who are interested in you. Your job isn't to scare away the bad guys, it's to attract the good ones. And profiles with negative warnings to the "wrong" men only make YOU sound bad.
Mistake #4: Expecting That You'll Succeed Online Because You're a Catch
You're sweet. You're fun. You're attractive. You have no trouble meeting men in real life. You figure that with all your good qualities, online dating should be a piece of cake. Except that's not how it's worked out. The only guys contacting you look like they've been let out of jail or a retirement home. There have to be better men out there. Then how come they aren't writing?
Simple. Any man who you think is a great catch has hundreds of options. And when a guy has that many choices, he's often going to search for younger women. Why? Because he can. So forget these guys and their unrealistic Playboy fantasies. Mr. Right is the man who wants YOU. Focus your attentions on the men who are searching for you, instead of the ones who aren't, and you'll have far greater success.
Mistake #5: Meeting for a Coffee Date to Save Time
Have you ever spent a month getting to know someone online and discovered on the date that they were a real-life dud? I have. I remember vowing not to waste that kind of time on a stranger ever again. You probably did, too. You probably started meeting guys right away to make sure that you had that "in-person chemistry." And at some point, on your tenth (or twentieth) bad date, you probably asked yourself, "Why do I even bother?"
Online dating is NOT about meeting men as quickly as possible.
Online dating is NOT about meeting men as quickly as possible. Moving quickly means there is no screening. There is no getting-to-know-you process. You might as well have cute men at a bar pick a number to meet you. The ONLY way to enjoy online dating is by going out with fewer men. It's far better to go on one comfortable date on a Friday night than five blind coffee dates during the week.
Mistake #6: Thinking You're Now Dating the Man You've Met Online
Have you ever gone on an amazing date and saw that he was online right afterwards? Have you ever emailed a man who seemed interested then suddenly disappeared? Have you ever gotten intimate with a man who never called again?
You're not alone. All of these things are common in the world of online dating. So instead of taking it as a personal rejection each time a man comes and goes, take a step back. Think of all the guys who have written to you that you weren't interested in. Imagine all of them taking it personally. It's ridiculous.
It's easy to forget how many choices men have. It's easy to forget how many other women they're contacting. And if you think that you're exclusive with every new guy that gets you excited, you're in for a lot of disappointment.
Mistake #7: Expecting Him to Tell the Truth in His Profile
You don't like to be lied to. Nobody does. And once you've gone out with a man who claimed to be 5'9" but is really 5'5", it's hard to keep dating. But haven't you ever done the same thing? The typical woman exaggerates her height by one inch and lowers her weight by 20 pounds. And it's not just a coincidence that the most popular ages for women on dat
|
|
  |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 5:19 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
Ulimaroa
Posts: 461
|
Mistake #7: Expecting Him to Tell the Truth in His Profile
You don't like to be lied to. Nobody does. And once you've gone out with a man who claimed to be 5'9" but is really 5'5", it's hard to keep dating. But haven't you ever done the same thing? The typical woman exaggerates her height by one inch and lowers her weight by 20 pounds. And it's not just a coincidence that the most popular ages for women on dating sites are 29, 39, 44 and 49.
You want to be given a chance. You don't want to be judged before you meet. And you're insecure that telling the truth won't get you in the door against younger, thinner women. So if there are good reasons why an honest woman might be tempted to misrepresent herself, wouldn't it make sense that an honest man might be tempted to do the same thing?
Mistake #8: Waiting for Men to Write You First
Have you ever sat in front of your computer, reading emails from losers, and asked yourself why the winners never write to you? You look at your favorites list and wish you could say hi to them, but you know better. It's tradition: men approach women. And you wouldn't want to come across as desperate. After all, what guy wants a woman who's so needy that she has to write to him first?
Actually, all men do. We love it.
If you have a good photo, an original profile and you write a confident email, most guys will drop everything they're doing to talk to you.
Mistake #9: Ignoring Your Own Intuition
How many times have you been across a table from some guy, wishing that you'd rather be anywhere else on earth? How many times have you felt deceived, angered, manipulated, or just plain turned off by the man in front of you?
Now, how many times have you considered that it was actually your fault that he was sitting there?
I'm not blaming you. I've been there myself. But the common denominator in all your bad dates is not the awful men themselves, but YOU. If you find yourself losing hope that there are any great guys out there, do yourself a favor and only go out with men who truly interest you. Instead of meeting total strangers, filter out men by email and phone. This strategy will prevent most bad dates before they happen.
Mistake #10: Thinking That Your Great Date Actually Meant Something
Have you ever had a man say how much he likes you, how sexy you are, and how he's serious about finding a long-term relationship? Ever have an amazing date where the chemistry was great, the conversation flowed, and you hooked up with him afterwards?
Have you ever had a man do all of these things and then NOT call?
No, you're not crazy or delusional.
Your mistake is thinking that what a man says on a date actually means something. It doesn't. It means he's being in the moment. So don't put too much weight on a great date. The only way you can tell how a man REALLY feels about you is by how quickly he follows up for another date.
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 5:29 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
jamminjerry
Posts: 4,085
|
i personally think that i have benefited greatly from mistake #8. there is only one absolute on my profile. all the rest, i am willing to compromise on. we be jammin 
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 5:45 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
sensuouswoman
Posts: 4,012
|
Mistake #1: Searching for the Right Dating Site
Who cares.........I'm on 20 of them 
Mistake #2: Signing Up for a One-Month Subscription
Ferget it.....I'm too cheap
Mistake #3: Trying to Stop the "Wrong" Men From Writing to You
I'm waiting for a 'bad' boy 
Mistake #4: Expecting That You'll Succeed Online Because You're a Catch
They don't call me sensuous for nuttin' 
Mistake #5: Meeting for a Coffee Date to Save Time
Can drink my own coffee at home.........Save Time and Money
Mistake #6: Thinking You're Now Dating the Man You've Met Online
Dating? I just want to cyber  
Mistake #7: Expecting Him to Tell the Truth in His Profile
He could be the King Of Siam for all I care!
Mistake #8: Waiting for Men to Write You First
Like we talking ...snail mail here or what 
Mistake #9: Ignoring Your Own Intuition
Thank goodness for the internet.....if I don't like someone I can just delete
Mistake #10: Thinking That Your Great Date Actually Meant Something
refer back to Mistake 6
What I'm saying is..this is entertainment for me.............and fun! Besides I get to see who's doing who...... 
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 6:00 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
ForumMod
Posts: 1,816
|
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
btw, "Source: Yahoo.com" 
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 6:03 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
candylily
Posts: 1,347
|
I don't make many of those mistakes except Mistake #5: Meeting for a Coffee Date to Save Time and that's because the guy wanted to do it and he's the one asking and paying. It's a mistake because you can't possibly learn much about each other that quickly and I personally think it's insulting that a guy doesn't want to risk a "real" date, but I've gone along with it a few times anyway.
I learned very quickly not to make mistake number 9Instead of meeting total strangers, filter out men by email and phone. but people can also wait too long to meet which doesn't make any sense either. I'm also very reluctant to go out with anyone who doesn't post several pics of himself on his profile.
Your mistake is thinking that what a man says on a date actually means something. It doesn't. It means he's being in the moment. So don't put too much weight on a great date. This one is the hardest for me. (Not the hookup because I already know better and learned that lesson long before the internet), but I don't understand the purpose of acting more interested than you are and it's also hard to understand how one person can think the date was great and the other doesn't. It's not just women who make that mistake though. I guess the person who is more attracted sees and hears what they want to.
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 7:04 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
BandTMom
Posts: 38,063
|
Mod. I recognized that one right off as I am an ex Yahoo user.
Give me MD any day!
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 7:12 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
sweet5red
Posts: 9,708
|
Mod. I recognized that one right off as I am an ex Yahoo user.
Give me MD any day!
exactly
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 9:21 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
duwant1
Posts: 575
|
btw, "Source: Yahoo.com"  How does the Mod know this?
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 6, 2007 @ 10:11 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
ForumMod
Posts: 1,816
|
the mod knows all! 
anyway, i listed the source (mainly because i had just read it, beside this makes it 'legal' because it wasn't in quotes - or a joke) and didn't want anyone to slam the original poster if they disagreed with her for anything that was written.
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 9:07 AM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
Ulimaroa
Posts: 461
|
Still dont know how to quote ... so this is to the one above me 
Thanks for making it clear and by doing so protecting me 
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 5:37 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
Soggydog352
Posts: 48
|
Women make mistakes?
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 5:42 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
EyesofBlue72660
Posts: 13,047
|
They do......it's just not normally admitted to men! That or it was admitted during a football game! 
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:03 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
spongebob777
Posts: 7,904
|
I refuse to believe that.
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:05 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
EyesofBlue72660
Posts: 13,047
|
Spongey......wring yourself out so you can absorb some new data!!!! It's true!!!!
Good to see you back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:07 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
KAOS2007
Posts: 8,201
|
#1 Classic Mistake Women make in Online Dating -
Trying it in the 1st place!
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:08 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
lj450
Posts: 9,551
|
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
Not sending enough naked pictures.
Dooms them everytime.
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:09 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
Always_Striving
Posts: 8,794
|
Hey what about not offering oral sex on the first date? ..... you know that's a big one.
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:09 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make!
|
|
EyesofBlue72660
Posts: 13,047
|
, so LJ............what's my mistake?!?!?!?!?!???!
|
|
| |
|
| Sep 25, 2007 @ 6:11 PM |
10 Classic Online Dating Mistakes that Women make! |
|
lj450
Posts: 9,551
|
hahahaha
Not knowing the correct email address?
I can fix that for ya, by the way.
|
| |
|
|
|
|