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Online romance or real attraction


Sep 29, 2007 @ 1:50 PM Online romance or real attraction    
Loreli


Posts: 19,316
I wondered this after posting in another thread:
Say you've been talking online to a person (a few months or so) you have been attracted to online, maybe some phone calls, but you have never met.It SEEMS serious. No real plans for a physical meet.But you both stated feelings for one another.

Then, you go to the store, the local coffee shop, bowling alley, bar, etc., and meet someone you are instantly attracted to. You talk, they want to call, meet for dinner.

Do you go? Do you remain "true" to the person you have professed to care deeply for who may live across the country, that you have never met?
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 1:58 PM Online romance or real attraction    
Angel178


Posts: 21,994
I can understand that question....
A guy was in my school the other day....he was construction...doing work on the school....
I mentioned that he was cute....one of the owners of the school (her husband owns the construction company, so the guy works for her) she wanted to fix me up with him.....to her I was single, he is single and she says is a nice guy....

I don't want to cause my feelings are elsewhere...(very far away) she thinks I'm crazy cause the guy liked me....but I don't want to.....does that make me crazy for holding out for someone that I haven't met yet?
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:14 PM Online romance or real attraction    
EyesofBlue72660


Posts: 11,667
Key sentence being:
No real plans for a physical meet.

Maybe it's just me, but I cannot consider getting too involved with someone without an actual meeting. I can certainly understand developing a fondness for someone through correspondence and telephone conversations, but to pin my hopes on something that may never happen doesn't compute in my head nor my heart.

I don't understand becoming exclusive prior to meeting someone and establishing if face-to-face chemistry even exists. And I certainly don't consider becoming exclusive with someone after one meeting/date - no matter how long you've been writing/talking.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:17 PM Online romance or real attraction    
KAOS2007


Posts: 5,082
Maybe it's just me, but I cannot consider getting too involved with someone without an actual meeting.
I don't understand becoming exclusive prior to meeting someone
I don't understand that either.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:22 PM Online romance or real attraction    
wandaful123


Posts: 1,507
Now this is a question I too would love to see some feedback on... very interesting, I wonder if the male and female perspective would differ?

Not trying to be vague, I think, but I think there would be a lot of variables involved. How long have you been talking? Would it even be appropriate to bring the subject up to "on-line" friend? (without them feeling as though you are looking for something from them... )

It's a hard call this whole on-line thing. A strange new world...

Then again, dating is supposed to be a simple meeting of folks right? getting to know people to see if they are someone you may be interested in developing a relationship with... I guess it leaves an unfair disadvantage to the on-line piece of the picture but I suppose that is a risk we take when using this media to develop "relationships"...
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:24 PM Online romance or real attraction    
KAOS2007


Posts: 5,082
I guess you have to go with your true gut feelings. If it means waiting for the one far away, so be it. If it means meeting the one right in front of you, so be it. Tough call though for sure, where feelings are involved, because we all know it is very easy to develop feelings for someone in the virtual world. The spoken word is very powerful.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:30 PM Online romance or real attraction    
sweet5red


Posts: 7,871
i beleive i would have to go with the Physically here and now.. since you didnt meet the one online yet.. face to face.. just my opinion.. sweet N Louisiana
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:41 PM Online romance or real attraction    
drs297


Posts: 3,018
if there are no plans for meeting gotta say go with live.

but my biggest thing is something Angel said.

One of the owners of the school and her husband owns the construction company is doing the work, I paraphrased.

What kind of school?? Sorry for way off topic but found it odd since in most states that might be illegal especially if bids were taken
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 2:52 PM Online romance or real attraction    
Luisa909


Posts: 1,571
My premise is that real things are better than virtual and we must live real life

Anyway it could happen to feel something deep for an online person after chatting, writing, laughing, knowing him day by day
Maybe we will never meet him/her.....but for a period of our life this person is in our mind and it's not so immediate think about other.
Perhaps I'm silly....but I think so.

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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:10 PM Online romance or real attraction    
definitelydi


Posts: 12,602
I'll always choose someone in the flesh.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:14 PM Online romance or real attraction    
lj450


Posts: 7,933
You cant f*ck a keyboard.


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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:19 PM Online romance or real attraction    
Luisa909


Posts: 1,571
Lj you enlighten my way with your wisdom

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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:27 PM Online romance or real attraction    
drs297


Posts: 3,018
nope you can't but even in real life I've fuked some about as alive as they are
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:28 PM Online romance or real attraction    
KAOS2007


Posts: 5,082
Gives a whole new meaning to the insert button
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:33 PM Online romance or real attraction    
drs297


Posts: 3,018
and the reason behind why they are single and fuking a keyboard.. that is small
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:38 PM Online romance or real attraction    
definitelydi


Posts: 12,602
You cant f*ck a keyboard.

Maybe with enough lube? I mean...if you can do it with a phone...jus' sayin'.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:40 PM Online romance or real attraction    
drs297


Posts: 3,018
now I understand why my phone bill has so many service charges, its because others are fuking thiers
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 3:44 PM Online romance or real attraction    
kattsmeow


Posts: 20,882
What kind of school?? Sorry for way off topic but found it odd since in most states that might be illegal especially if bids were taken

As far as I know, in Michigan, Indiana and Ohio it always goes to the bidder.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 6:36 PM Online romance or real attraction    
duwant1


Posts: 570
You can't f*ck a keyboard.
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Sep 29, 2007 @ 6:53 PM Online romance or real attraction    
Pete73052


Posts: 19,368
Well it's a tough call. For me - I don't mind waiting until I meet my long-distance match - and I have plenty of opportunities to stray in the mean time... but I don't. Having said this - I also go out often with friends and have a social life that includes clubs and parties and such.

Someone who doesn't get out very much, like my match for example, would probably benefit from seeing people socially, even romantically IF that's what she felt comfortable doing. If it is a forced thing (pressure from, say, co-workers or family) then that doesn't seem like a good enough reason (to me). If it's an honest desire to date, then she should follow up on it by all means.
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