| Dec 15, 2005 @ 9:24 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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cestlavie515
Posts: 14
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I have fallen one too many times for the sweet little things some guys have said to me, only to be burned. It is sad that there are guys out there who play on a woman's emotions just to feel good about themselves. I'm not going to trash talk anyone here. Guys, if you have played a woman just for the sake of playing her, you already know who you are. This is for the women who, like I, have been led on or disillussioned by guys who make you think you're the most important thing to them only to find that they are saying the same to a number of other women. I know there are a small percentage of honest, sincere guys out there somewhere. Unfortunately, I do not believe I have yet to meet one. It is frustrating and gives all guys a bad rep. Ladies, feel free to vent, because I'm one who can understand and empathize with thu underbelly of the online dating site routine. Guys, if you have anything to say, you are most welcome, but please speak with respect. As for me, I am fed up.  I don't know how much longer I'll be on any dating site. So, gals, open up. If you have advice, please share. If you have similar stories, I welcome them. Again, this isn't to trash talk any particular person, but just women bonding together who have been played by these boys in men's clothing.... We have to stick together sometimes, you know, ladies? 
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 9:29 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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spongebob777
Posts: 7,904
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Guys, if you have played a woman just for the sake of playing her,
I stood a girl up when I was about 16. She taught me a lesson when I was 18 by breaking my heart. 
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 9:30 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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MarysPlace
Posts: 2,930
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Well, we can't say that we didn't see it coming many a post ago. *sigh*
Remember, people can "con" us only as much as we let them.
I leave you ladies to bond now...
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 9:50 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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peaches_n_cream2002
Posts: 302
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Fool me once, shame on you... fool me twice (3 times, 4...5..etc) shame on me.
It happens. Sometimes we protect ourselves as much as we can, make all the smart moves, and yet still get burned. That's the rare occurence.
Usually, we saw and ignored all the signs and let it happen.
Mary's right.. most of us allow ourselves to be put in those situations because... well, there's a variety of reasons.
But let's not hate on men.. because women are just as evil.
The human race has faults... we're imperfect...we're selfish... we make mistakes... it happens.
What we can do to avoid the "wrong" people... be good people, put ourselves out there, be ourselves, be smart, and don't be desperate.
It's more simple than we make it...
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:29 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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waiting41
Posts: 1,926
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 You go Peaches.......If something KEEPS happening to you, it's time to look at yourself. 
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:31 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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LatinButterfly
Posts: 687
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Cestlavie515:
Pay no attention to the opinion of some here who are sarcastic and full of themselves enough to actually believe they were born knowing everything.
As I said in another post, not every woman is BROUGHT UP the same way! Some of us have old-fashioned values, were surrounded by people we could trust so taking someone at face-value comes naturally for us, at least until we get burned a couple of times. Also, there are times in which some of us are more vulnerable than others and it's not that we choose to ignore "red flags", sometimes we think (or are told) that it could be our fears talking rather than "intuition". After all, not everyone is equally intuitive...
I do agree that being "burned" more than twice in one's lifetime might be a sign of issues one needs to resolve, but even twice could be due to difference of circumstances. For instance, being conned by someone in real life doesn't necessarily prepare someone who is unaware of how many predators there are on the internet AND their different "m.o." to be able to field them off.
Moreover, it's my personal belief that life is like school. We repeat the same lessons/grades until we have learned them and then go on to a new level of challenge. Just like it's not anyone's personal fault to be born with a lower IQ, there is really no shame to be a little slower to catch up regarding relational matters.
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:39 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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MarysPlace
Posts: 2,930
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You go Peaches.......If something KEEPS happening to you, it's time to look at yourself.
You are so sarcastic and full of yourself but you nail 'em! 
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:43 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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cestlavie515
Posts: 14
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Thanks, Latin. You know what I'm talking about.. I just don't see the need for guys to plays us like they do. Nor for other women to gang up on one another. I posted this for women, so they could share their experiences. That's it. Yeah, I was foolish, but now I know better....
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:53 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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sunchaser59
Posts: 528
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You go Peaches.......If something KEEPS happening to you, it's time to look at yourself.
Sorry, Mary and Waiting, I disagree........but you're cool with that, right? 
So, if one trusts......that's not a good thing? Pulleeeze, ladies!
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:57 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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waiting41
Posts: 1,926
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 Alright, alright, don't go!! It's just that you really do need to learn to protect yourself from this and learn what the signs are so it doesn't keep happening!! Men can only get away with this with women who are vulnerable to it! There's all kinds of scum out there and you need to get tough and protect yourself! All the venting in the world isn't going to change these guys and maybe you should be looking for ways to not let it happen anymore. I find the best thing to do when I have a problem is ask "What am I going to do about it?" We can't change others, only our reaction to them!
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 10:58 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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nah12
Posts: 3,973
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So, if one trusts......that's not a good thing?
it depends on what you are trusting.....  
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:07 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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sunchaser59
Posts: 528
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On "what" you are trusting? Orrr "who". Please we're all big boys and girls here.  Some are honest.....Some aren't
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:19 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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sunchaser59
Posts: 528
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it depends on what you are trusting.....
Ahhhhh, to be psychic (sp?)
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:35 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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Pete73052
Posts: 19,368
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Well, it's hard to keep track of everyone here - so I thought I'd better update my spreadsheet. 
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:37 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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Pete73052
Posts: 19,368
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So seriously, please don't blame the guys for this. Gullible people fall prey to people that are aware they are gullible. It doesn't matter if it is for sex, or money, or religion, or politics, or marketing fuzzy Sesame Street toys... if you're gullible, you're going to get screwed... um... so to speak.
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:51 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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LatinButterfly
Posts: 687
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It cracks me up... if we dare to trust we are called gullible and if we are cautious we have trust issues. Really!
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| Dec 15, 2005 @ 11:54 PM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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Pete73052
Posts: 19,368
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Well, there's nothing wrong with being trusting - but really, guys aren't that smooth... there are always signs and being trusting doesn't mean you don't watch out for signs. If all your dates are on Tuesday night - then you're Tuesday girl. If he says busy every night but Tuesday, and you believe him, you're gullible... IMO.
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| Dec 16, 2005 @ 12:07 AM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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LatinButterfly
Posts: 687
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I noticed something that reinforces my point:
Waiting and Mary live in really big cities and the rest of us with an opposite point of view don't and possibly were also born in places where "everyone" knows one another whereas the others had to start watching out for "scum" really early in life so, understandably, became more "street-wise".
Note that I didn't say it's OK to be deceived multiple times, I really wouldn't let that happen to me but then I'm over 50, Cestlavie is over 20 years younger than me... What I don't like is for people to be blasting somebody because they made mistakes and without considering why this could've been.
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| Dec 16, 2005 @ 12:19 AM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read
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peaches_n_cream2002
Posts: 302
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Latin.. your theory doesn't work. I grew up in a town of 4,000, went to college in a town of 2,000.
I knew everyone everywhere.
I'm still not naive.
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| Dec 16, 2005 @ 1:12 AM |
Support Group for Women Conned by Guys - Ladies Read |
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sunchaser59
Posts: 528
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Latin.. your theory doesn't work. I grew up in a town of 4,000, went to college in a town of 2,000.
I knew everyone everywhere.
I'm still not naive.
Pehaps, you are an exception to the rule.
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