| Nov 4, 2007 @ 7:37 PM |
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jentoblues101
Posts: 198
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I'm thinking of changing my profile and am looking for feedback.....(grinning!)
Attractive, plump, 46 year-old professional female and home-owner looking for a male companion. Must be fairly bright, able to see his feet when standing, and hold up his end of a conversation—hair is optional. He should not be intimidated by my profession or education, and should not mind listening to occasional ramblings about the corpus callosum, evolutionary psychology, the relapse process, EMDR, PTSD, and what a bitch work can be. Knowledge in these areas is a plus, but not required.
Availability is required. He should be both willing and able to spend most weekends and some week night evenings with me, as well as help around the house and yard in trade for various dubiously-performed domestic chores: I'm not a good cook, nor is my baking repertoire blindingly brilliant, but I'm willing to try (warning: don't let me iron your shirts, no matter how much I plead).
Steady employment is also required, as are outside interests. I'm not adverse to the idea of a hunter or sports fan, and would be willing to try either/or should the situation demand; I have no passion for either, but appreciate passion in others.
After a six-month trial period, this gentleman should be willing to consider co-habitation: the house is small, but there is a spare room that can offer a private space, and I'm willing to get a television and turn off NPR....occasionally. Finances would be split down the middle.
Light drinking and smoking is fine, but not in the house.
Must not currently smoke pot or do other drugs.
Must be adept at giving and receiving, both emotionally and physically.
Must be patient with strong women who have a hard time being emotionally vulnerable.
Apply within.
~Jennifer~
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 7:46 PM |
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twotall911
Posts: 12,863
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good ad 
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:05 PM |
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ToucherinSparks
Posts: 6,701
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Too many big word, make head hurt....
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:08 PM |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,446
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I like it, Jen!
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:09 PM |
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jentoblues101
Posts: 198
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Poor baby....don't apply within then, lest your headache continue into eternity....
And thanks for the feedback Mr Twotall.
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:11 PM |
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jentoblues101
Posts: 198
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Thanks B-Mom!
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:17 PM |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,446
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I ought to have you re-write mine. 
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:50 PM |
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Laidback742
Posts: 3,432
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Mine would be rather easy to rewrite.
Horny male. All female inquiries considered.
Hey ... you never know.
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:54 PM |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,446
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 8:58 PM |
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jentoblues101
Posts: 198
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Laidback, how about:
This paragon of manhood is truly appreciative of all that is feminine and seeks women to pleasure and be pleasured by.
Sounds better, don't it?
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 9:00 PM |
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Laidback742
Posts: 3,432
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OK .... you're hired.
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 9:13 PM |
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robodad
Posts: 5,872
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You didn't mention if there was any chance for advancement. 
Will the person be entitled to any days off and is the person entitled to any benefits?
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 9:16 PM |
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jentoblues101
Posts: 198
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Benefits? Those will be discussed in private.
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 10:15 PM |
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signme
Posts: 9,590
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Geez Jen--you're 46?? You look about 15 in that pic! LOL 
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 10:22 PM |
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Sweetheart83446
Posts: 7,155
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Love IT! 
Now, could you write mine and I will pay you in imaginary pesos? 
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 11:09 PM |
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kattsmeow
Posts: 21,282
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I like it, and think you should try it and see what happens.
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 11:11 PM |
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katydid438
Posts: 6,783
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Sounds great
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 11:26 PM |
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Palomino
Posts: 7,503
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Wow...putting in my request for Jen to rewrite my profile!
Must be adept at giving and receiving, both emotionally and physically.
Apply within.
Does physically mean sexually? 
Apply within?? My mind must really be in the gutter tonight. 
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 11:41 PM |
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1stsignofspring
Posts: 16,199
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Getting in line behind Pal..............Help a poor sister out Jen??
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| Nov 4, 2007 @ 11:49 PM |
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robodad
Posts: 5,872
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Now the bad part....the poor applicant must face strong women! How many women is he forced to be patient with?
After six months (if co-habitation takes place), he gets the spare room? Sheesh! And maybe a TV will be placed in the house?
Applicant, prepare to be assimilated. 
(all in good fun, folks)
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