| Dec 19, 2005 @ 4:39 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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summersquall

Posts: 518
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Another thread got me to thinking about this. Just what in a relationship do you consider private and personal? What are some of the topics or areas which you just would not discuss or disclose details of with people other than your partner?
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 4:46 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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AladinSane297

Posts: 102
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money issues are of course private and personal..
arguments that you've had for the most part... there are exceptions (everyone needs to talk to someone and get new perspectives)
your feelings about your partners friends are between the 2 of you
bad habits.... the annoying little things
There's not a whole lot that's private anymore.... it's almost sad
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 7:20 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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kattsmeow

Posts: 21,282
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Sex. That is a very private matter for me. My husband is the only one I will talk to about this.
Anything that my husband has told me in confidence.
If some one tells me something they don't want anyone else to know, it stays with me.
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 7:39 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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summersquall

Posts: 518
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I would say the following for me;
1 - Sex
2 - Finances
3 - Disagreements
4 - Things spoken to each other in confidence.
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 8:29 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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buni

Posts: 971
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Everything in a relationship is personal. I don't see how a lot of people can post in open forums all about their sex lives, money problems, or arguments that they have had....I just could not do it.
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 8:35 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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torees121

Posts: 739
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If I was in a relationship I wouldn't be on MD so it wouldn't even be an issue.
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 8:56 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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kattsmeow

Posts: 21,282
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Hm, I am here and it is not for any other reason than to get to know more people. I am a social butterfly(my mom told me that). The more people I know, the better.
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| Dec 19, 2005 @ 11:31 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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lookin4netpal

Posts: 24
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Interesting question...guess it can only be really answered by individuals in the relationship. Some people don't want much at all shared, some are open books. I don't think either (or anything in the middle) is wrong--as long as it has been discussed and agreed upon. I talk (a lot LOL) and so I am more on the open side. But I wouldn't discuss the ins and outs of my relationship on here, if I were in one, without my significant other knowing about it. I'm just comfortable with the amount of anonymity we do have on here, but that's just me.
--Cookie
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 12:34 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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Angel54214

Posts: 14,066
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My point of view on topic...When 2 are in a relationship, you are a family. Family life is private. Weither its discussions, arguments, money, sexuality, future plans, education, work, religion, children, relatives, friends, habits, gossip, dreams, fantasies, finances, health, joy, laughter or tears. "There's No Place Like Home"
Anything within the relationship boundaries are confidential. Trust, respect and love is built upon the family. If one item is broken out of confidentiality then trust, respect and love starts to disapate. The family needs to establish through growth what their boundaries are. Few families really communicate properly. So relationships go down hill like a snowball or domino effect. Communication is the link within the family to establish a healthy, loving and growing relationship until death.
Not everyone has the same strengths and weaknesses to make this family strong. We are different in how we think and act. Sometimes a weakness or a strength can look either right or wrong. Our perception looks at the surface without considering the depth without exploring further with care and love. Arguments develop on disagreements or objective situations. How they are handled in the family relationship, is what the outcome will show.
In all my seminars I have ever attented, this is just the surface of what I have learned to begin a long lasting loving and happy relationship. My points of view....Angel
[Edited on 12/20/2005 12:36 AM]
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 12:40 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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glamgrl

Posts: 44
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I agree with many of the people here. I think a relationship should be a private matter. I have a few very close girlfriends I talk to about guys, but, I would never discuss those matters on a public message board.
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 12:50 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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wandaful123

Posts: 1,511
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Fears and weaknesses I would discuss with no-one but my partner.
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 12:51 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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ExacerbatedTaboo

Posts: 1,401
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So what are you afraid of Wandaful?
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 10:19 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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wandaful123

Posts: 1,511
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Shhhh.. Taboo, is a secret!
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 10:40 AM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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MotownManiax

Posts: 7,881
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Intimate details regarding sex, finances, and anything confided in trust should be excluded in "any" public conversation.
Otherwise, I personally don't have a problem giving the circumstances of how we met, what we did in the relationship, and how it ended (if talking about an ex), unless certain details would violate the parameters above.
Let's be real, being on a dating site means we have to be somewhat upfront and honest about our past or current relationships. Too much secrecy and "no comments" produce their own red flags.
Now, I know some people on here are already in a relationship and are only looking for friends. In that case I'm not sure how far they're willing to go with giving out personal relationship details. That's a judgment call to make individually.
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 11:17 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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walkingman

Posts: 639
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I think everything is a relationship is private. There are alway's people who will tell you what you what you should and should not do. Only you can decide that.
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| Dec 20, 2005 @ 11:30 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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joesch_1999

Posts: 34
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easy one sex wouldnt discuss that with anyone except my partner
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| Dec 22, 2005 @ 5:52 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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Always_Striving

Posts: 7,596
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summersquall
Women have to talk about the sex they had with you to another woman.
As for the other 3, she'll be on the phone talking with her mom about those things.
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| Dec 22, 2005 @ 7:26 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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Angel54214

Posts: 14,066
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Ah..Always...Not all women ok....I never did that when I was married or in a relationship. My Mom is in heaven...
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| Nov 17, 2006 @ 8:42 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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Artemis122

Posts: 623
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I think a relationship should be a private matter. <<.....>> I would never discuss those matters on a public message board. More so, I think PRIVATE means whatever happens behind "closed doors." Until a currently relationship has reached the MATURE stage of Truth & Trust it is meaningless to bring up past relationships Unless there are Residual Benefits in such a Full Disclosure.... IMHO In regards to personal data volunteered here in this Forum -- from what I've seen, UNFORTUNATELY, is used by one Party as a weapon to Hurt & Wound another during moment of Anger & Disagreement -- thus their personal battle History & Grudges therefore begin, again UNFORTUNATELY....
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| Nov 17, 2006 @ 11:29 PM |
What is still private in a relationship? |
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The_love_Giant

Posts: 693
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I think if its private and personal then leave it that way am I not right? Case in point my two really great friend's dont have now what to till u and what not to tell. That being said they both tell me about there sex live's. I dont need to know what go's on in there bedroom's. And they get in to the dirty details about what they done. Anyone with me on that?
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