| Apr 4 @ 1:27 PM |
How do you know??? |
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VirgoGirl1964

Posts: 94
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...honestly? I am talking with someone that I have interest in...so...how do I tell everyone else that I have talked to in the past that I have met someone that has really touched me in a way that no other e-mails or blogs have? How do I KNOW without a doubt that this is a real man? The man for me? Should I take the chance and destroy or eliminate the friendships that I have already made? Leaving my communication open to only one man? If I do continue the relationships that I have started...does it make me dishonest? Something on the "back burner" in the event that my assumed "true love" and I don't click? How do I hurt the others...how do I say..."You aren't the one?" ...but "if this doesn't work you are a close runner up"? I have met a few toads on this site but the majority of my experiences have been wonderful and I have made friends with people that I would have never met if not for MD. It has been exciting and fun...and then again...I feel a tightness in my stomach...is this real...is he real? Is he the one or is it someone I have placed on the back burner? I guess more than anything...I am questioning myself...I've made the bad decisions in past relationships...jumped the gun...got married to fast...all of the things that most of us have done...I'm not unusual. I have never been in a situation like this and being new to dating online I'm just not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings. I guess I am too nice...
I do know how I feel now...today...this minute... my thoughts and dreams are with him constantly...I long to hear his voice...to finally touch his face...to look into his eyes...to feel the excitement that I feel when I speak with him. I believe today that he is the answer to my prayers...my last companion. I hope with all of my being that YOU are real...I am.
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| Apr 4 @ 2:07 PM |
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Jalon

Posts: 898
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You don't know. That's the thrill.
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| Apr 4 @ 2:18 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower

Posts: 15,333
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You don't know, and from what you didn't say, I gather that you haven't met him yet...which means the show-stopper's still in question (chemistry, of course, and I mean the literal pheromones too). Any time I was in that stage of a relationship, I was totally honest with anyone I'd been corresponding with - telling them that I was too preoccupied with one man right now to be able to think in those terms about any other man. If they wanted to keep corresponding as friends, that would be fine, and if not, I might well get in touch if this doesn't work out. And I changed my profile to reflect that...but that's me and I've always met the man within a week or so...that first kiss is always a deal maker or a deal breaker for me.
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| Apr 4 @ 2:26 PM |
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sweet5red


Posts: 8,129
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Somebodys someone someday
No im not rich like oprah Or A mrs rockafeller No I don’t look like Christy Or one of those supermodels I don’t drive a fancy car Or have my”signature” On a fancy perfume bottle I don’t own a designer label Or wear clothes with such What I have is mine Though some might think its NOT MUCH No I don’t live in a palace Just a humble little place I work hard for for every dime and Bide my time Till with a turn of his head My someone shows up I will know him when he does I will see it in his eyes And yes he will Recognize That’s its me Hes looking for I’ll open that door And let him In and THEN I will feel like i Am The richest one on earth.. The most sassiest Prettiest redhead Cause im that somebodys Someone and hes MY treasure Beyond Measure.. so baby Claim your treasure in Me july 9th 2007
and he has.........
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| Apr 4 @ 2:28 PM |
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Loreli

Posts: 20,313
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I agree that you don't know. But there is no harm with being FRIENDS with those you already knew.
Unless you led each one to believe they were more than that. That's the trouble with having several "relationships" at the same time.
And be prepared-if you tell each one you have hooked up with someone special....that may be the last you hear from them...
good luck
(they all may have just seen this anyway...)
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| Apr 4 @ 4:33 PM |
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whatagal

Posts: 809
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I have a guy friend who now has a brand new g/f. I said I'd like to get to know her. Why not turn it into an opportunity to make new friends instead of burning bridges and hurting someone's feelings?
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| Apr 4 @ 4:41 PM |
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VirgoGirl1964

Posts: 94
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I was too preoccupied with one man right now to be able to think in those terms about any other man. If they wanted to keep corresponding as friends, that would be fine, and if not, I might well get in touch if this doesn't work out. Thank you Wildflower! This is perfect!
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| Apr 4 @ 4:47 PM |
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VirgoGirl1964

Posts: 94
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...thanks Loreli...and fortunately for me I haven't led anyone to believe that there is anything other than a friendship and flirting. But now that I am getting to know the man behind the screen name ( hey baby...you know who you are) I would like to let the others know in a nicer way...not by ignoring their e-mails...they have been kind, they don't deserve to be ignored.
thanks for your advice!!!
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| Apr 4 @ 4:48 PM |
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VirgoGirl1964

Posts: 94
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I AGREE!!!
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| Apr 4 @ 4:53 PM |
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ColdinWisconsin

Posts: 8,637
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Heck I posted on the site that I was taken. And who I was with. Making it public makes it clear to everyone...even to other "potentials.
I felt that the man I was with at the time deserved to have the assurance that I wasn't "fooling around" and I still got to keep my friends. Easy Peasy.
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| Apr 4 @ 5:02 PM |
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DwainP50

Posts: 5,009
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Sooooo are you taken now?
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| Apr 4 @ 5:19 PM |
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Skydognc

Posts: 2,913
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Baby,
I cannot tell you what to do, and I know how uncertain this time is for you.
These are dificult choices to face and make.
My best advice is to trust and follow your heart. Drill me, ask me, look for flags, I have nothing to hide. What you have come to know about me is true and genuine.
I believe with all that I am, that a man without integrity, is no man at all! I am who and what you have seen in me, and I am real. What we have shared is real.
This dog, is totally and completely comitted to you, and you alone. To explore our world and lives together, and see where this shall go.
I believe in what we have, and have found in each other.
walk with me........ hold my hand, and let us watch this world unfold before our eyes.
in two weeks.... we shall perhaps see, and come to know......
all that has happened, that we have always been left in wonder.....
will somehow finally make sense.......
for everything in life, always leads us to the intended purpose of our being.
......welcome to my doghouse Baby! ........
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| Apr 4 @ 5:21 PM |
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painter007

Posts: 15,990
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^^^^^^^^ good man dont pass on this one.VirgoGirl. And we Virgos have great intuition.......follow it
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| Apr 4 @ 5:24 PM |
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pamdemonium

Posts: 14,546
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Aw man...that was the sweetest thing to say, Doggie.
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| Apr 4 @ 5:36 PM |
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blueyes101

Posts: 8,307
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If it grows to more than friendship, please do both of you a favor and meet ASAP> Have well defined goals you wish to accomplish and list of those you don't .
The longer you wait, the more of " image " you create in your own mind, internet dating is hard enough, putting unnecessary pressure to live up to your " image " makes it even harder.
And one more thing, the longer you wait to meet, and longer you " talk " either by email, messenger or on the phone, the more you commit your heart, without knowing if the chemistry is real, and knowing for sure you if are/aren't seeing things through rose colored glasses.
If it is as real as you think, find out, and if it isn't, I give you the same advice.
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| Apr 4 @ 5:44 PM |
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blueyed_cdn_girl

Posts: 24
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sweet words for her doggie,,,, very reassuring!
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| Apr 4 @ 6:23 PM |
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DiamondRain

Posts: 4,903
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I'm trying to figure out what is going on and what the question is exactly.
Is this right?
You met someone online and you are attracted to him. You are asking how to know if that attraction is .......... (fill in the blank). If that attraction is what?
Of course the attraction is "real" if you feel attracted. How can it not be real? Attraction is what it is.
If you are asking if it will last a long time, no one knows the answer to that. How can anyone know when you can't know yourself? No one knows the future. People being attracted to other people, and then getting into relationships that later break up is as common as fleas on dogs.
Romantic relationships are about chance. You reach a point where you either decide to take that chance, or you don't. If you do take it, you are risking a broken heart somewhere down the road. But if you don't you are risking missing out on something fulfilling. It's a leap of faith.
OK, the other question ... I think you asked? .... "how do I tell everyone else that I have talked to in the past that I have met someone"
I'm not sure what you mean here... if you mean that you like announcing publicly that you met someone you find attractive, then you have already done that just fine here. If that is what you want to do, you already seem to know how to do it. But my question is why do you feel the need to tell everyone in the first place?
If you are asking how to tell other people that you are not looking for another relationship because you already have one, or you are not currently seeking one that's easy too ... just check "In a Relationship" for your relationship status in your profile and mention you are only looking for friends.
Finally ... you didn't mention if you have actually spent time with this person in person or you only know them online.
In my opinion you CANNOT know someone well enough online to decide if you are truly attracted to them because there are too many things that you can only learn about a person IN PERSON. So if it is one of these deals where you only know him from online, my advice would be to AT LEAST meet him in person before risking your heart. Not doing that is a foolish risk.
Wait! I just checked your age... come on ... you already know all of this you little thrill seeker you. .
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| Apr 4 @ 6:32 PM |
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kattsmeow

Posts: 21,272
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Doggie?? So, is that your way of letting us know who your crush is?
Girl, this is one fine man!!!! You better get him while you can!
Either that or we were going to auction him off.
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| Apr 4 @ 6:37 PM |
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teddybearagain

Posts: 769
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Virgo, ..although we have not had the pleasure of one on one conversation, I first want to welcome you.
I do however know Dog, .. and know of the person he is. He has been a great friend to me. I have seen his goofy side, his sarcastic side, his azzhole side, but most importantly, I have seen his side of genuine caring. He is a man of integrity, warmth, compassion and love. These things I don't need to tell you.
What I do want to share with you though, is that I have never heard him speak in such language before, as he does with you, or about you rather. The depth of his voice takes on a new tone when he speaks of you. This speaks volumes of the person he is.
Take his hand, as he asks, .. walk the path of life that only you two can step. The road will twist and turn, be bumpy at times, and even smooth pavement at times. The key is to walk the same steps of the same path, hand in hand.
For the other gentlemen you may have conversed with; I suggest simply stating to them that you are exploring a relationship with a man that has your thoughts totally on him, and it wouldn't be fair to either of you two (you and he) to continue with the conversations, etc, at this time. Simply stated, but done tactfully.
I do hope for the best for you
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| Apr 4 @ 6:43 PM |
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DiamondRain

Posts: 4,903
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OK, I get it...
This whole thread is a girl thing.
Enjoy!
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