| Apr 5 @ 10:28 PM |
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Skydognc
Posts: 2,913
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So, I ended up at a sports bar tonightt... The NCAA final 4 is on ......
the bar is packed, and im guessing every horny, single, middle aged woman in my town was there, and full of spring feverl !
To make it worse....... I waited at the bar, 2 hours for my table.....
now mind you, This is the first time I have been out in over 2 years , as a single person....
After afew exchanges of kind words, several times..... and a few offers to keep me company, while I dined alone.... and my repeated saying , no thank you........
I came to the realization......
here I am in a bar, with all these women, who live within probably 10 miles,
and all I can think about is a woman 550 miles away, whom I have only known from words on a screen. Not one person in that bar, even came close, to the one who has caught my attention to profusely!
I might be crazy.... but the truth is......
if anyone here knew V-girl, the way I know her.........
they would have done the same !!!!!!!!
so..... be honest........
would you choose an online hopefully...... over a local, here I am, do you want me?
I made my choice......
but the truth is.....
it was never a choice to begin with !
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| Apr 5 @ 10:34 PM |
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Jalon
Posts: 898
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I would, but that's what works for me. 
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| Apr 5 @ 10:35 PM |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,408
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If I were developing an online relationship that I took very seriously, I would act as though they were in the same town.
If someone has toughed my heart and deep down into myself, I could never let that go.
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| Apr 5 @ 10:36 PM |
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signme
Posts: 9,581
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I haven't been to a bar in years so I wouldn't know how I'd react. But then again, most of the men there probably had women with them! LOL
Nice to know some LDRs can be handled well. Best of luck, Dog!
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| Apr 5 @ 10:37 PM |
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Loreli
Posts: 20,313
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Well, that's hard to say...since you haven't met yet...
Sometimes the meeting crushes the crush...(see other threads on this 
Was it bad of you to think about her....no.
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| Apr 6 @ 2:46 AM |
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grumblebear
Posts: 10,494
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it is never wrong to act in an honorable way... choosing the way that you feel right is all you can do...
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| Apr 6 @ 3:44 AM |
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beckyiv42000
Posts: 12,054
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Sky hon... honestly those same women will be there next year and will be willing then too..  so no harm no foul... you chose to honor a commitment (even tho only words) and that is what makes you the TOP DOG ...  
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| Apr 6 @ 3:51 AM |
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Skydognc
Posts: 2,913
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here is where I get confused........
bear in mind, dating on a dating site is a new concept for me, and Yes, I have heard the horror stories......
Her pics are a couple weeks old (some), and I have sent her pics of me, taken today.
all of our talks have been deep and down to earth. Neither of us want deception and we try always, to keep it "real".
It seems to me that our meeting, serves as a confirmation of what we know already is real.
Certainly nothing in life comes with guarantees, we both know this, but it seems so many hav guarded themselves so much on here.
Is it really that bad,........... online dating and meeting ?????
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| Apr 6 @ 4:01 AM |
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beckyiv42000
Posts: 12,054
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Oh geeze YES it can be Sky... scary even.. there is soooooo much you cannot KNOW about someone even tho you CAM or talk on the phone that can turn off the SPARKS ... let me see I'll pull a few from my memory of recent dates k??
HORREDNOUS breath OMG 
annoying habits like talking over you...
being nasty to service persons (big no no in my book no reason for it)
their inability to LOOK at you in the eye
SMELL 
overly aggressive or passive to the point of GET THE EFF away 
NOT being what they portray (I HATE LIARS )
shall I go on??
but then again there are those who are MUCH MORE than they appear and that is what makes it worthwhile to try this form of finding someone
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| Apr 6 @ 4:06 AM |
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Skydognc
Posts: 2,913
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point taken Becks !
very true....... I hadnt considered those issues !
................ happy dog here.............
<------cute as a puppy......
....she gonna love me ! 
................ I do use lysol, air freshener in the bathroom too !!!!!!!!!!! .........
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| Apr 6 @ 4:08 AM |
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beckyiv42000
Posts: 12,054
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Of course she will hon ... sheesh if for nothing more than your wit and charm
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| Apr 6 @ 9:47 AM |
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BUSTED616
Posts: 55
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I would just say that from what I`ve seen, you certainly seem to fly from relationship to relationship, so I wonder how serious ANY of them are.
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| Apr 6 @ 10:12 AM |
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sciurusniger
Posts: 2,959
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All I can say is that knowing someone from emails and phone calls is not always the same thing as knowing them through spending "face time" with them.
Sometimes we invest our time and heart in communicating with someone and get "lucky", ending up with more, ending up with that "happily ever after". But much more often we end up with nothing. And that is because from the first time we make contact, our inner voice begins to tell us what's really going on. It is hard to hear that inner voice, however, when the shouting of our hopes and dreams and wants try so desperately to drown it out.
Never for a moment think that intellectual and emotional compatibility automatically grants physical compatability. It doesn't. They are three legs of the relationship triangle and a relationship cannot stand without all of them in place and with all of them in balance. Therefore, it is only when eyes meet, when time is spent doing things together, that what is called "the spark" either manifests or not. And for the record, only one element of that physical compatibility "spark" is sexual compatability. While it's important, what is more important is feeling sure, comfortable, at ease; able to be one's real Self around the other person 24/7/365.
I've said many times that the internet allows us to "meet" compatible people we would otherwise never have the opportunity to know exist. That's its beauty, its charm. But it's also its dark side, its shadow; for our world is our perceptions of it and so we have a tendency to color it to look the way we want to see it. That rush of finding a sympathetic shoulder often confuses friendship with "truuu luuuv" because we are so conditioned to the ideology of coupleness and hold such deep-seated and often unconscious fears of being alone, the result being the heartbreaking consequences we see here on a site like this time and time again.
Certainly when a high degree of intellectual and emotional compatibility is found in a place like this and both people are committed to meeting (eventually, if they live far apart), it is right to honor that commitment if the inner voice (not the fear-filled ego) deems it the best course of action. But to pin "happily ever after" on it and declare it to the world as anything more than two elements of the relationship triangle is putting the cart before the horse. For until you've spent enough time together, it is nothing more than a great friendship colored by fantasy.
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| Apr 6 @ 11:35 AM |
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Skydognc
Posts: 2,913
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Busted ....... 
nice to see ya again......... the new name is awesome....... it fits !!!!!!!!!!!!!!
just out of curiosity...... how many relationships?
the only one I am aware of, was with feetz?
come to think of it..... she is the last woman I ever held......
have I missed something in my life, you arent telling me ??????
..................................................................................................................
Sci.......
Those words are awesome....... imvho, MD should put them on their internet guidelines to dating !
People too often confuse an online attraction, with love. Yes, sometimes we create a fantasy....... make everythng look like a fairy tale dream, with the hope, it pans out. Often we end up looking the fool for doing so..... my feelings..... I am not hung up on others opinions about me, save my true friends here, so if some want to laugh and say....what an ass! ........ I shall laugh with them and say.......yip!
Love develops with time and patience, from two people who see in each other a desire to devote themselves to wanting, then making it happen. Nice words on a screen are only a small insight, to the person underneath the BS.
that being said.....
You know from my past, as well as anyone, the experience I went through when two people come together, and choose to live together..... it becomes the true test of compatibility. Feetz and I learned a difficult lesson. In the end, we both grew from the experience, and are wiser, for it. The awesome things is...... we are and will remain always, very close friends. She has moved on in her life, and I am doing the same.
Yes, this is a very exciting time. But we both are very real, and realistic in what this is, at this point. We are optimistic in what the future holds, but it holds no promises. We do know that meeting is both essential and necessary, and hvae set the date, in two weeks. From that moment on, we shall decide if there is something in which to build, or choose to remain friends.
What we do in private, is very real. She knows my life, my past and even has a current pic lol, and I do hers as well. We both are totally honest as we understand we want our meeting to be comfortable. If deception is involved, this could not possibly happen.
Many have been jaded by the online thing. I still maintain, when two people remain real, to themself and each other...... it can and does work.
but..... until we meet..... the fantasy continues..... although the feelings are genuine, it is only the words spoken to each others eyes, that makes all this a reality!
just my thoughts here........
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| Apr 6 @ 11:41 AM |
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 9,609
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Please ponder this.
Its never been a choice about online vs near. All that is, is adding crap to the pile of what holds us back or down.
It about, truth.
Which way your heart pulls you is the way you should follow. Yet before you do, know you heart. This will cut down the dead ends and tragic accidence.
I useded the wrong word.  So i fixed it.
Thanks dog. My prayer is that I am ready. I wish the same for you all.
[Edited on 4/6/2008 11:51 AM]
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| Apr 6 @ 11:47 AM |
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Skydognc
Posts: 2,913
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awesome Burns !
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| Apr 6 @ 3:24 PM |
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ThangelM8
Posts: 2,393
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would you choose an online hopefully...... over a local, here I am, do you want me?
I made my choice......
but the truth is.....
it was never a choice to begin with !
Skydognc, whether it be online or out in the world, when you commit yourself to exploring the possiblities of a relationship, remaining committed to that decision speaks of strenght of character. Upon eventually meeting this person face-to-face, you may find it isn't what you want. But until then, it is quite honorable to stand firm in your decision to see where this might lead, rather than taking the easy road of .........."They are miles away and what they don't know won't hurt them." I applaud you for your convictions!
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| Apr 6 @ 3:49 PM |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,791
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Afraid I can`t give you any advice my doggy friend when I`ve failed miserably myself at the very same thing...just gotta do what you think is right..iffin its what you want then go for it...
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| Apr 6 @ 3:59 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 15,333
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Amen to the above posts...you know we wish you guys well, and hope that 'third leg' (no pun intended...well maybe a little) is as compatible for you as the others. To tell you the truth Doggy, I was skeptical when I first started reading this thread, not because I questioned the honesty of your intent, but I was wondering about your honesty with yourself...your last post makes me think that you really do know yourself well enough to make a leap like this so soon after your last relationship and you learned enough from it to avoid making the same mistakes again.
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| Apr 6 @ 4:10 PM |
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Nightowl001
Posts: 4,134
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nevermind
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