| Apr 25 @ 10:03 AM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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Silvertongue62
Posts: 6,932
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Hello Silvertongue!
Whats up baby?
You doin ok?
(those are my 50 questions)
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| Apr 25 @ 10:05 AM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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DwainP50
Posts: 5,009
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I can understand not wanting to be subjected to the 50 or so questions or having to ask them too. But this wasn’t really what I was looking for. If you want to get to know someone really well what questions or conversation would you deem important to you personally.
Of course this isn’t a flam on anyone because I really do respect everyone’s opinion, sense of humor and also there own interpretation of this thread, but I figure why not shed a little light on where I was coming from that is all.
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| Apr 25 @ 10:11 AM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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pamdemonium
Posts: 14,546
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I guess a lot of it just comes down to chemistry. You either have it or you don't....and if you have to try too hard, maybe it's not a good fit. Sometimes you like a person, and just want to keep trying, but they either try back...or they don't. When there's chemistry, it isn't difficult. The conversation flows and it's not herky jerky. You can ask, they can ask and everyone gets answers without a lot of pain.
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| Apr 25 @ 10:12 AM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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Silvertongue62
Posts: 6,932
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Well usually, people will tell you all you want to know. You only have to make them comfortable and situations present themselves.
Ex: in conversation people often complain about how tired they are. just be sympathetic. Ask them " You had that rough of a day today?" " Then .."So what happen at work today?" Now they are telling you what they do, what they dont like or didnt like. then they are telling you about a foot surgery they had and why standing on their feet is bothering them. and so on and so on. Then here is the kicker. After that they will start to volunteer information deemed personal by most. the family. " Then after i got home from work this happened or my son/daughter did blank. but whatever is said make sure you also offer up comparative information. Sharing is key and you will get to kow them and they will get to know you as well. Just one example.
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| Apr 25 @ 10:21 AM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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willowy1
Posts: 4,881
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Sorry Dwain!
I guess I would ask them about what kind of relationship they had with their Mother.
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| Apr 25 @ 5:32 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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CHARLIgurl1
Posts: 658
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I dont think you can ever go wrong with asking about sport kids and animals.
What sports do you enjoy.. what teams?
What animals do you have? whats thier names?
any kids?
These are lighthearted questions that start a good conversation.. and always avoid politics and religeon !!
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| Apr 25 @ 5:40 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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sirdidymus
Posts: 1,087
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actually, and this is just me personally - i would never ask about someone someone's children until i felt the rapport was comfortable enough to do so. i kind of feel icky to ask/talk about something so personal with someone i hardly even know. i figure that's one of those "when the time is right.." type of things...just my $.0000000001 worth :D
[Edited on 4/25/2008 5:48 PM]
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| Apr 25 @ 5:42 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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Loreli
Posts: 20,293
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When there's chemistry, it isn't difficult. The conversation flows and it's not herky jerky. 
(Of course, it may take a few dates for the shy person...)
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| Apr 25 @ 5:45 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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DiamondRain
Posts: 4,898
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Are those a C or a D cup?
Would you consider breast augmentation?
[Edited on 4/25/2008 5:49 PM]
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| Apr 25 @ 5:47 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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sirdidymus
Posts: 1,087
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Have you ever hit a woman?
Do you believe in working for a living and what are your goals?
Are you prejudice?
if someone i hardly knew asked me questions like above, it would make me wonder really hard just what type of person they're used to dating in the past - sorry, but that's how i would view it. That's like asking someone "have you been to prison?" "do you have any STDs?" "do you kick little puppies for fun?" - all in and of themselves good questions that any reasonable person would want to know - but at the same time - pointless questions because if someone can answer yes to those questions - would they really anyhow? unless you're asking someone not expecting a direct answer - but just to see "how" they might answer - in which case, i'd sense that and be offended that someone is testing me w/o being direct.
in short, it's all about timing. if i got to know a person a bit, and they confided in me about past issues they've had to deal with - and then asked me those questions - i'd be happy to answer. But if they just asked them out of the blue, without any reason - i'd really have to question the person that's asking those questions.... It would sound, to me, like they're looking for reassurances from someone that they don't do those things - so if the time comes and the person does end up doing those things, the person asking the question can put blame onto the significant other and say "but i asked you - why didn't you tell me..." etc etc etc - instead of accepting responsibility for allowing themselves to be in such a situation to begin with.
deep i know, but those are deep questions and that's stuff i'd think about if someone was asking me that right off the bat...
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| Apr 25 @ 5:59 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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CHARLIgurl1
Posts: 658
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I dont really see how asking if someone has any kids is related to.. Do you kick puppies?
most older people have kids.. its something that the majority have in common.
If someone took offence because I asked do you have any kids.. Id wonder what they were so ashamed of or why indeed they were afraid to answer,,
Sorry.. But I dont see this as being rude or too forward at all.
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| Apr 25 @ 6:05 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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DiamondRain
Posts: 4,898
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I think it's really important for many people to ask if the other person has kids as early as possible because to some people this could make a big difference. And for some it's a deal breaker, so why not find out right up front instead of wasting time?
I can't imagine how anyone would take offense to being asked if they have kids. I've never seen that happen.
Hmmmmm wait ... I did once date one woman who didn't want me to know her age, so she didn't want to tell me anything about how OLD her kids were. I was polite and didn't press her. I found out later.
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| Apr 25 @ 6:10 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 9,605
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I guess I would ask them about what kind of relationship they had with their Mother. It was the rough kind the ended in lots of love, understandance, and acceptance. How was yours?
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| Apr 25 @ 6:35 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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sirdidymus
Posts: 1,087
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I dont really see how asking if someone has any kids is related to.. Do you kick puppies?
actually - neither do i - which begets the next question - what are you referring to (as i never even remotely inferred that asking about kids had anything to do with kicking puppies)?
i don't have children. but i don't believe it's my business to ask someone about their children until i first get to know someone. let's say this first - there's not a right or wrong here - it's just my opinion and how i feel.
i've come across people who have stated that they don't talk about their children until they get to know someone. i guess i'm confused - why would someone not desiring to talk about their children with a complete and total stranger correlate with (a) being offended or (b) being ashamed - sorry, i don't see that.
i don't see that as someone taking offense at all - i see that as someone being careful and selective about who they talk with their children about. if they're first chatting with someone that they don't know from a whole in the wall - say the first few emails - i think it's very logical to not have a desire to talk about one's children with what essentially amounts to a complete and total stranger.
Diamond - in someone's profile -it almost always states whether or not a person has children (unless they put "prefer not to answer"). Further, often in someone's profile, they'll mention specifically about "having one daughter and two sons..." etc etc. I'm not talking about knowing if someone has kids - i'm talking about asking "about" the kids, asking personal questions about them - when if you haven't been on a date with someone - there's really no reason to know any personal details about someone's children - again, just my $.02 worth...
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| Apr 25 @ 7:01 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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Makya
Posts: 1,131
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What makes them happy and what makes them sad.
How do they view their life as it stands now.
What valuable lessons do they feel they have learned from past experiences?
Where do they see themselves five years from now?
Explain a typical day in their life.
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| Apr 25 @ 7:05 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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sirdidymus
Posts: 1,087
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What makes them happy and what makes them sad.
How do they view their life as it stands now.
What valuable lessons do they feel they have learned from past experiences?
Where do they see themselves five years from now?
Explain a typical day in their life.
i like all these questions but the bolded one is easy, the same place i see myself now - in a mirror, no...? 
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| Apr 25 @ 7:12 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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Makya
Posts: 1,131
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Don't be such a smart ass.
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| Apr 25 @ 7:21 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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sirdidymus
Posts: 1,087
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 ..................... 
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| Apr 25 @ 7:42 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well?
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Brass_Wolf
Posts: 670
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After showing her a series of ink blots, ask her if any of the pictures made her think of cooked beets. Then ask her who she voted for in the 1999 Presidential Election. (trick question, I know) Finally, I'd ask her if she was stranded on a desserted island made entirely out of milk chocolate, would she fashion a shelter to keep an area from melting in the Mid-day sun. If after my asking her these questions three and she's still looking at my crotch, I know she's a winner.
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| Apr 25 @ 7:45 PM |
What are good questions to ask to get to know someone really well? |
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Loreli
Posts: 20,293
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Is your crotch made of chocolate? 
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