| Jun 22 @ 1:14 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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georgiapeach42
Posts: 303
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I originally posted this as a blog but thought I would move it here to the forums.
Recently I decided to try to have a serious relationship again, yeah after some of the turkeys I had met I thought it may be better to be alone. But I thought ok Shirley give it another chance but I have a list of what i want in a man. Please tell me if I am being to picky.
1. I want a man to love me and want me but not need me.
2. He has to work and support himself but not try to support me. I am just to dang independant.
3. Understand that I will wash his underwear but he may have to put them away himself because if I work 8 to 10 hours a day I will not be the only one to keep house. I aint his mom or his maid. I will cook a huge dinner but he better learn to love dishpan hands because I hate doing dishes.
4. I want a man that will treat me like a lady in public but know in private anything goes.
5. I want a real good man with just a touch of bad boy in him. I guess in other words a REAL MAN. Think John Wayne.
6. I am a vey girly tomboy that loves the outdoors and a total contradiction in terms. I want a man that will see that and just let me be who I am.
Is that being picky?
AND FEEL FREE TO ADD ANYTHING YOU FEEL YOU WANT IN YOUR MATE.
Hell maybe we are all picky.
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| Jun 22 @ 2:05 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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jdc67
Posts: 54
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Speaking strictly online overall women are far more picky then men.. and in fairness if the men to women ratios were reversed. Most of us men would be the same way.
Through time I have made adjustment.
I want a woman who is ready to build on a relationship. Who understands the importance if a strong base and not just the superficial things. It is longterm commitment
I want a woman who can be supportive in both good times and bad. To often relationship are great but then something happens not to fault of either then they just prefer to end it.. I don't need that.
I want us to share our lives I dont want us to be second to the other. If neither of us can be the other a priority we have no business callinig it a serious relationship.
The silliest excuse I have heard for divorces and breakup is i was bored. These tend to be the same women who still go out for ladies night to get hit on by men.. Boring people get bored. Most credidable councelors will agree that it can be dangerous to deliberately put yourself in potential infideliy settings.
Whatever it is that i want I am prepared to and will offer the same in return. I live by actions, honesty and integrety. So should she
Superfical things i look for
age 28-38 ( i am still open to having kids I dont want that option completely closed 28 is pushing it i think but I want to remain open)
kids - realistically most in my age range will have kids but i would prefer not I do like kids and it is not a deal breaker if she has kid or if she says i never want them . The things is if she does I dont want the baby daddy drama.
physical appearance.
Race/Color - I am open and have dated woman of various backgrounds. I guess i mostly date either caucasion or hispanic since i am half hispanic
height - 5 2 - 5- 7 ish but not that terribly important
size slender to a little over
smoking no
drinking socially I guess at the max
drugs no
money - has a job income is not my focus it just shows independance
education I want someone who is intelligent but to me your degree of lack of does not make you smart or not smart
Well I guess thats it for now
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| Jun 22 @ 2:35 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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marylou
Posts: 10,350
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.........friendly....love of family and friends.....outgoing ....tolerant of others to a great degree....patient.....kind....caring.......compassionate.......good sense of humour.......doesnt dislike animals....even if they dont want any.......has a good relationship with family and their own chiildren......relates well to people in general. Is a good listener........meaning....REALLY hears....and gives full attention........while your talking/conveying something important.......or just throwing your thoughts *out there*. A sense of humour......a happy heart......has a moderate outreach to people. Is prepared to give and take.....is thankful and happy to please.....at least some of the time. An unclingy person.........not a totally needy person....who always wants their own needs met while neglecting yours.
......doesnt need to be a totally 50/50 relationship.......because one or the other always tips over a little........but at least 60/40......one year....then vice versa the following year........  ......HAS TO BE HONEST AND LOYAL......sincere and genuine in nature. Loving and affectionate......gosh.....too many to name. Doesnt have to be perfect tho........lol....
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| Jun 22 @ 3:24 PM |
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Aeromuse
Posts: 1,816
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A pulse and a penis, preferably in that order 
Seriously though, I'm damn picky and I know it. But that's OK because it's not like I'm not content on my own - I love my life just as it is. If Mr. Wonderful happens to show up I'll welcome him with open arms, but I won't wither away and die if he doesn't.
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| Jun 22 @ 3:49 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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jamminjerry
Posts: 3,731
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independent comes to mind first. i cannot say i have never met an independent woman but, never in my life have i known an independent woman, my Mom came close but even she needed help from outside her circle. physically, i would say : tall, weigh less than i do (just those two attributes eliminate a lot of gals) but as others say, i am just a bit picky. as with most folks i have many other values that i am willing to compromise but the #1 thing i look for? "i shall endure no woman who does not posess the pearl i seek" we be jammin 
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| Jun 22 @ 4:13 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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ash_is_unforgetable
Posts: 837
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3. Understand that I will wash his underwear but he may have to put them away himself because if I work 8 to 10 hours a day I will not be the only one to keep house. I aint his mom or his maid. I will cook a huge dinner but he better learn to love dishpan hands because I hate doing dishes.
I dont know any guys who do dishes, and I think I'd be suprised to hear a guy who would learn to love doing them. I think it might be easier to find a guy who would invest in a dishwashing machine lol. Just my opinion-Ash
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| Jun 23 @ 1:00 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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Say_Yes
Posts: 1,633
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I have a list of what i want in a man. Please tell me if I am being to picky.
(snip)
Hell maybe we are all picky.
Some people would consider that being picky, others wouldn't. For me, your last statement, is the most important. Not only are we all picky, we should be more picky.
How many of us, have made one or more mistakes in the past by marrying the wrong person? I know that I did. While there is nothing that I want more, than to find someone to love, cherish and with whom, I can share my life, the last thing that I want to do, is to make another mistake and simply settle for someone, rather than be alone. Been there, done that.
While I don't like being alone, I much prefer to be single and looking, over being married and miserable. For you to want to find a match that fits with who you are and what is important in your life, is not being picky. It's being sensible and mature.
So, be patient, keep looking and you will find your match. After all, it"s not important that everyone be a good match for you, but rather that you find the match that is right for the both of you. When you do that, you will have the chance to be one of those, who lives happily ever after.
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| Jun 23 @ 1:20 PM |
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marylou
Posts: 10,350
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...not sure if I believe in the *happy ever after* part. We all know that it does happen to great number of people. We know people who have been married for a lifetime and loved to death and its been perfect. And it still happens today for all ages. Its great to be postive.......I think many of us DO keep trying and think postively. But there are no *air tight* guarantees......because one or the other can *change*.....and seeing we live in a changing world......its unrealistic (I believe) to think that people wont change also. Illness can come along for one or the other......and other tragedies.....and can change people into different people.....people that can be hard to live with........turn abusive.......and all sorts.
I guess I will be happy with the here and now.......and from day today.......for as long as it lasts.....whether 6 mths....6 yrs or 16 yrs or more. I dont bank on it lasting forever. It would be nice if it did......thats the ideal.....that we all would want. But the moment to moment happiness......day to day happiness.......would suite me for starters. Sorry for pointing out the flip side.
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| Jun 23 @ 10:12 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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georgiapeach42
Posts: 303
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Just being realistic Marylou. And Say Yes is right too. Thanks guys.
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| Jun 23 @ 11:37 PM |
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 9,952
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I'm not looking. I've found.
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| Jun 24 @ 1:14 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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Bluebonnet72
Posts: 2,738
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What do you look for in your mate?
sense of humor
sense of humor
sense of humor
this is one the great quality a human being can have 
then of course there are other positive attitudes he should have 
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| Jun 24 @ 1:29 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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painter007
Posts: 15,881
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patience.....forgiveness.......................and he must be able to kiss, long deep passionate kisses.....that last for days..the kind that makes your body go limp in his arms, so you have to reach out and grab him. Pulling him in so close, that your body melts into his..your legs get all tangled up, and you whisper in his ear all your desires....
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| Jun 24 @ 1:32 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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marylou
Posts: 10,350
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PAINTER................find one for me......I WANT ONE OF THOSE........
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| Jun 24 @ 2:14 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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happygrlok
Posts: 3,875
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someone who is able to give as well as accept love....and is really emotionally available.... 
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| Jun 24 @ 2:27 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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marylou
Posts: 10,350
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HAPPY.......what does emotionally available mean?  
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| Jun 24 @ 2:48 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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happygrlok
Posts: 3,875
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are they truly ready for a relationship?...or just out testing the waters....that is what it means to me...
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| Jun 24 @ 3:58 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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marylou
Posts: 10,350
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AAAAAAAAAH I seeee.........thank you!
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| Jun 24 @ 4:40 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 14,807
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Living nearby, but not looking for a housemate, so I have a place to escape to!!!
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| Jun 24 @ 5:09 PM |
What do you look for in your mate?
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 8,861
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I want to accepted and be accepting of those I love and grow to love.
 Like holding hands threw many years.
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| Jun 24 @ 5:11 PM |
What do you look for in your mate? |
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cantthinkofaname
Posts: 64
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a heartbeat
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