| Jun 30, 2008 @ 9:58 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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ash_is_unforgetable
Posts: 842
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I would just like some thoughts and opinions from others on two things.
1.) First off, I have gotten emails from men and after a email/messenger conversation or two, they expect to talk on the phone, and keep in mind I usually know very little about the person, so therefore I feel shy and perfer to get to know them a bit better before I give my number, I really dont wanna give every guy who emails me my phone number right away, but guys get all mad and offended by it. I'm not saying I wait forever, but I think 2-3 conversations online atleast isn't that big of a deal! How do others look at it? How long do you wait to have a phone conversation with someone?
2.) Secondly, I have talked to some wonderful (or so I thought lol) guys off of dating sites. (Not all at one time though) And after talking on the phone a few times, I've had men expect to meet right away, meaning a week or less of phone communication. And I've made it clear that I am shy and it takes awhile for me to be "comfortable" enough to meet someone. I usually say 2 weeks before I meet someone. Guy gets mad, and thinks I'm playing games and isn't serious about finding a relationship, which is totally wrong. I don't go into details but I give the reason of me not wanting to meet right away is me being cautious and wanting to feel like I know enough info about a person, because I have had extremely bad experiences meeting people, and just in my life in general, and I feel I have a right to wait to feel comfortable with someone before hurrying up and meeting them. And I think if a guy can't respect that and realize that I might be worth the wait then its there loss. But now this has happened a few times and then end up telling me i'm a game player and then they don't talk to me anymore. How long does everyone else wait to meet someone? And keep in mind most of the guys I've talked to live 1-3 hours away, so its not like there right here in my town.
Now I'm at the point where I hope to find someone to talk and get to know who lives across the country because they wont expect to meet in less then a week lol.
Thanks in advance for any comments/opinions. And hopefully I explained myself well enough! -Ash
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:14 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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signme
Posts: 12,588
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I feel like you do Ash. One or 2 emails and then off to IM or phone is not enough for me. I need to know a bit more about the person first. I think guys want to get the initial meeting over quickly to see if there is an attraction while women are a bit more careful. If the guy can't see your reasons why, then you probably won't be a good match anyway. So I say, stick to your guns, girl!
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:15 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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Aeromuse
Posts: 3,979
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You don't have to rationalize being cautious and level-headed IMO. Even though it's possible to get "close" to people on the net and the phone - you're still meeting a stranger. When and if you're comfortable - by all means hook up. If he has a problem with waiting - well, do you really want to be with someone like that anyway?
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:33 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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Hey Aero ~ what's your number??? 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:35 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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Aeromuse
Posts: 3,979
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Hardy-har-har 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:37 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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Sign ~ what's your number 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:38 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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signme
Posts: 12,588
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LOL Keep trying Silver! 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:39 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Aeromuse
Posts: 3,979
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Manwhore!
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:40 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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Ash ~ what's your number 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:40 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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pamdemonium
Posts: 17,347
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He never takes money, Muse. Just sayin...
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:41 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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Aeromuse
Posts: 3,979
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Ah, then he's merely a male slut!
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:42 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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You're my last hope Pammy ~ what's your number??? 
Ah, then he's merely a male slut!
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:44 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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signme
Posts: 12,588
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Emails first, Silver. Aren't you paying attention?
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:44 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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1stsignofspring
Posts: 17,992
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You have to give it to him......he is persistent!
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:47 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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Aeromuse
Posts: 3,979
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Oh wah-wah boo-hoo Silver
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:50 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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Spring ~ you got a cell in that bottle of yours??? 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:52 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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willowy1
Posts: 9,199
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Wouldn't it be best to meet as soon as possible? 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:54 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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Oh ~ I already have her number ^^^ 
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 10:56 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone?
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signme
Posts: 12,588
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I think sometimes it depends on circumstances Willowy. If there's a lot of distance involved, one person may not want to invest a lot of money to go meet if they don't feel like they know the other too well yet. I always like to exchange emails for about a week here on MD before giving out any personal info. If the guy is too persistent wanting my phone number or IM, I just don't like that. I explain what I'd like to do, and then if I never hear from him again, it wouldn't have worked out anyway. I've met a lot of people from online in person but I'm still cautious.
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| Jun 30, 2008 @ 11:07 PM |
How long before phone convs. and meeting someone? |
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Silver1961
Posts: 4,326
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In my experiences, after exchanging email a few times, and especially IMing in most every case the gal has just volunteerly given me her number, and even with me being the guy, I didn't wish to call in all cases...
Being a man, I have never been fearful of meeting a gal right away ~ though I have been rather shocked when doing so...  .. On two occasions, the women had been using very outdated pictures 
I do understand why a woman would be reluctant to meet a man for the first time ~ especially if only after a few conversations.. I heard from some gal that she drove like two hours to meet a man at a McDonalds to go out for dinner.. She assumed that was just a meeting place, but he had coupons for McD's  ... Needless to say ~ that was their last date..
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