| Jan 18 @ 1:18 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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luneib
Posts: 732
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I have an online acquaintance who has low self worth.  I had complimented him and he felt insulted . So....to make a point, I told him about an ex bf who was not a good looking guy, I would send him a pic of my ex just to prove that NOT all women date model types, he wanted no part of it, he chooses to believe, what he chooses to believe that my ex is a Brad Pitt type and that all women are shallow and are only after a guy for his looks, that is sooo wrong. This guy is so down on himself and will not believe anyone who tells him they like his photo because as he puts it, he was rated very low on another website. To me, who cares what people rate you?  You love yourself first and accept yourself as you are. Does it matter what people rate you? No.  . Why can't he get a woman? That is obvious, he is down on women. Even my ex told me he didn't feel he was good looking. He said he felt sorry for my ex, that I was so mean writing to him about how my ex was not good looking and that he felt sorry for the guy. He said in a prior email that the guy could probably get all the women he wanted, but that is entirely the opposite case. He said women date only good looking men, NOT true. True there are shallow women out there, but then there are others who are not. Just to make a point here, my ex was the one I fell madly in love with, I still care about him, but life goes on and I had to move on since he doesn't love me, sigh.. The guy I write to chooses to believe my ex is a great looking guy and can get women. This guy I write to definitely needs a boost in the self esteem department he will believe what he chooses to believe, so be it, the man can not be helped. Will he get a woman, I say no at this time, why? Because of his lousy attitude about women. He was afraid for me to send him that photo of my ex because he didn't want to know that he was wrong. The guy I write to does not feel that he himself is good looking. Guess that's the last time I compliment anyone on their looks, geeez. Anyhoo, this guy hasn't a clue. I try to make a point to let him see that it's NOT all about looks, but he wants no part of it. He chooses to believe that I was with my ex because of his looks, not at all the case. My ex has a kind heart, a great personality and a wonderful inner beauty.  I guess some people just can't be helped. I feel bad for him. It's almost like he dislikes women, yet he wants a woman. He is so down on women.
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| Jan 18 @ 1:22 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone |
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signme
Posts: 12,577
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Yep, he needs to get an attitude adjustment or he will never find a woman. The last 3 guys I've dated were not movie star handsome but I liked them for who they were, not what they looked like.
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| Jan 18 @ 1:40 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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thor22
Posts: 3,350
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its not mere coincidence that you should say he is down on womens, lune, and that signme sez he needs an attitude adjustment, for that is precisely what Dr. Thor prescribes for this head case patient...he needs a woman to go down on him and that will give him an uplifting attitude adjustment!
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| Jan 18 @ 1:56 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone |
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signme
Posts: 12,577
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Thor.........
Seems there may be more men that need some kind of counseling, not just Lune's friend.
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| Jan 18 @ 2:17 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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blueyes101
Posts: 12,080
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Not sure if this is the same guy as the other thread, but, he seems to be trying to manipulate you as well.
He wants women to feel sorry for him. Probably for attention.JMO
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| Jan 18 @ 2:29 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone |
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daisy315
Posts: 4,945
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Same guy Blue.. actually.. I thought we had gone over this.. the guy has problems that only he can fix.. why waste time trying to change his mind about things?.. Kinda like beating a dead horse.
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| Jan 18 @ 7:42 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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jamminjerry
Posts: 4,085
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the O P reminded me of discussion i had recently. a gal and i were discussing the match game on the internet and i asked if she had tried matchdoctor. she said her favorite site was "hot or not" . she suggested that i try it and in a moment i was in the program. and so i turned to her and asked how do i get to the section that one uses to search. i reminded her that i am looking for a tall redhead. she seemed a little confused and replied that the only search you do on "hot or not" is just looking at the pics! LOL!!!! i replied that that took care of hot or not! if i can't even start by setting some parameters other than looks it wasn't the site for me. of course we all look at the primary pic! we are visual but if that is the only value that is important to you then you should have no problem with shallow hal and shallow hailey! LOL as for your Bud, perhaps you should let him alone. as you have noted already about the point you have made, the effort you made has been rejected. there is a parable or proverb somewhere about tossing seed on rocky ground. if the seed ain't gonna grow you ought to to be able to tell that you are wasting time and move on to another part of his life that you can benefit. we be jammin 
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| Jan 18 @ 9:41 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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OP-
they say if someone in your life is dragging you down then maybe they shouldn't be in your life.
And yes, same man gets 2 threads? Sounds like he's pretty important to you....
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| Jan 18 @ 11:15 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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luneib
Posts: 732
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No, he's not important to me, I just believe in helping people when I can but apparently he does want any help and I have tried hard to help this guy with no luck at all, he just won't listen to anything I have to say, it's his way or the highway. He would rather be miserable and do the poor me pity party thing. Yes, this is the same guy as the other forum post. I actually thought I could help this guy but he is beyond help. Manipulation? Yes, I agree. I know, if he doesn't change his attitude he will not find a woman, that is true, I agree with you guys. Yes, he is all about sympathy. Sure hope he's not waiting for an email from me 'cause he will have a long wait lol. I have stopped corresponding with him, he does not deserve my friendship. 
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| Jan 18 @ 11:55 PM |
Trying to make a point to someone |
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pomegranate
Posts: 1,676
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Very gently but firmly assure him that there is nothing whatsoever wrong with the way he looks.
Then explain to him it's his personality that totally sucks.
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| Jan 19 @ 12:01 AM |
Trying to make a point to someone
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 13,027
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Give him a quarter and tell him to buy a clue. I aint no one shrink. Keep up or fall behind.
We are what we are cause we get something from it. For one reason or another. Low self worth? Pity party for one anybody?
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