| Jan 10, 2006 @ 10:38 AM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while.
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Always_Striving
Posts: 7,541
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If you are dating someone and you are being harrassed by your family or friends about the race of your partner, weight and age issues, the career your partner has chosen or their financial status, their medical condition, and their choice of faith. How do you deal with it?
What if you were in a social setting and the things were brought up in casual conversation, how will you respond?
Will you
A) act in defence of these issues?
B) just keep quite and keep your opinion to yourself?
C) try to educate or reason with your family and friends?
D) walk away and never speak to them again?
[Edited on 1/10/2006 10:39 AM]
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 10:40 AM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while. |
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Always_Striving
Posts: 7,541
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Correction in thread title
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 10:47 AM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while.
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,736
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C) try to educate or reason with your family and friends?
I think its best to sit down and discuss the issue in an adult manner...find out what their reasons are for disliking the person.See if maybe you can work the problem out..And if they don`t listen and continue to feel the way they do..then you have to make a choice...them or the one your in a relationship with..a lot of times they`ll come around if they see that your not gonna give up on the relationship because of the way they feel..
But thats just my opinion..I`m no expert 
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 10:51 AM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while. |
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EyesofBlue72660
Posts: 11,649
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I'd have to say "C" is about the closest. First of all, if it's a close family member or friend, they wouldn't harrass me...they might ask if I've considered the issues, but they know that I take all things into consideration and make my own decisions. If it's someone that isn't quite as close to me, I'd tell them that they are issues that I have to deal with, not them!! If they can't understand that, they can find someone else to harrass.
I don't let other people's prejudices enter into or influence my choices.
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 11:45 AM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while.
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Kimmaranclh
Posts: 132
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I have alot of experience with these issues. My X is not white and my family is really against that. Luckily I still had the support of my Parents which did help...but overall it was a very difficult and emotionally damaging time for both myself and my family. My X stayed out of it mostly but he was upset and I knew it.
Anyway, I tried to reason with those that I thought would listen and some of it worked. Most of it didn't. I haven't been with my X for a while now and I can tell you that the family atmosphere was greatly damaged by their ignorance. I was very close with my family and now I see those that couldn't accept my views only once or twice a year. It's really a difficult situation no matter how it's handled and you can only make a decision and stand by it in my opinion. I have a no tolerance policy for people that judge someone by the color of their skin...
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 2:18 PM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while. |
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danae74
Posts: 601
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Good question, Always! It's a situational call, for sure, but I'd usually try something between B and C. If it's an issue that can be handled with reasonable discussion, then C. If it's something that will only lead to an ugly confrontation, then I usually just back off. I know that some of my family's prejudices (and my own different ones) are based in fear, and I respect that; pressing someone further into a fear is rarely helpful.
I was very much into confrontation earlier in life, but now? Everyone has prejudices of some kind, and they have a right to those opinions, so long as they keep their opinions on their own side of the fence, so to speak. There's something to be said for living your life without needing to justify yourself to anyone else 
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 2:36 PM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while.
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MischeviousAngel
Posts: 277
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Either C or D depending entirely on if we have had the same conversation/debate multiple times before or not.
As an example... My grandmother is 93 and about a year ago I walked away because she chose to be verbally and emotionally abusive towards my children. I love my grandmother BUT I love my children MORE and I am NOT going to LET her do to them what she did to my siblings and myself.
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| Jan 10, 2006 @ 2:51 PM |
How do you cope with PREJUDICES of your partner, their parents or friends while. |
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CynCity
Posts: 556
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Actually, this was an issue for me when my ex and I met. My first husband was mature, wealthy and successful (and a real jerk), my second was anything but. My family was polite, but it was obvious they didn't approve of his social status and he always felt uncomfortable in their presence.
Eventually it lead to a division that never fully recovered in my relationship with my siblings, which is unfortunate because the marriage didn't work out anyway.
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