| Jul 10 @ 8:42 AM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship
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lucy8
Posts: 22
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You talk about love but the deep desire is to exploit the other.To be in love has become an utter hell, a continuous conflict -- nagging, always at each other's throats. This is the lowest form of love.
You are available unconditionally? That is possible only if love becomes more and more meditative.
Everybody has their own idea of love. And only when you come to the
state where all ideas about love have disappeared, where love is no more an idea but simply your being, then only will you know its freedom. Then love is God. Then Love is the ultimate truth.Love is the bridge. Love is the process of alchemical change in your consciousness.
Love is given for the sheer joy of giving it; it is not a bargain.
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| Jul 11 @ 3:28 PM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship |
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indecipherable
Posts: 546
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I've said be before and I will again: long distance relationships are dumb. If you can't be there for them when they need you (physically, not by phone or email) what's the point? I guess if you're the type of person who is satisfied with seeing a boyfiend/girlfriend a few times a year, go for it. But you have to be fooling yourself to think those are solid relationships.
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| Jul 11 @ 3:30 PM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship
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signme
Posts: 12,578
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But if one or the other is willing and able to move, then what is dumb about it?
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| Jul 11 @ 3:43 PM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship |
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indecipherable
Posts: 546
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very few end up that way, and it's especially rare now in this economy.
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| Jul 11 @ 4:49 PM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship
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Nightowl001
Posts: 7,495
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I don't know, Indi. I live in the middle of freakin' Nowhere, Kansas. I would like to meet a really great lady, preferably within about 100 miles, but if it was more, I'd still think about it, and then, after we'd gotten to know each other and decided maybe we were right for each other, I'd move. My plans are to move within a couple of years anyway. I just don't have a particularly good reason to move TO a particular location at this point in time. But I seriously don't expect anyone (at least not anyone in their right mind) to move HERE. Don't get me wrong. It's not a bad place. But I'm quite well aware that a town of 300 people, where the nearest Wal-Mart or doctor's office is 30 miles away, is not everybody's cup of tea. It works for me, because I work from home and have no great need for a lot of social interaction.
If she came along at the right time, I might just move to a city where someone lives who I've not even met face-to-face yet. Even if it turned out there was no spark in person, I'd still be in a city, where there were other opportunities to meet someone. If it was a big enough city (say, 150,000-300,000 population), or close to a city that size, I'd change my search parameters. That, however, seems to be frightening to some prospective partners, who don't quite understand that I'm not exactly moving to be someplace with them, based on little personal interaction, but that I'm simply willing to move to be someplace.
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| Jul 21 @ 9:23 AM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship |
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alinafarace
Posts: 6
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Hey! 
Very nice discussion for long term relationship. And given very nice ideas to handle this relationship.
But i believe in long term relationship you met online and your partner lives a thousand miles away, or if you were in a relationship together and one of you had to move, maintaining a long distance personals relationship can be challenging.
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| Jul 21 @ 9:59 AM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,952
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. But you have to be fooling yourself to think those are solid relationships.
You are fooling yourself to think you can judge a relationship between two people based on a factor such as distance just because of YOUR beliefs about it.  
My relationship is solid, thank you very much....my friends are very jealous of the relationship Marko and I have and how solid and healthy it is.
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| Jul 21 @ 11:02 AM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship |
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Gallows_Humor
Posts: 13,649
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btw....
http://www.google.com/search?q=Then+Love+is+the+ultimate+truth.Love+is+the+bridge.+Love+is+the+process+of+alchemical+change+in+your+consciousness&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=ie7&rlz=1I7GGLL_en
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| Aug 3 @ 2:50 PM |
Dating on the internet and long distance relationship
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Eondera
Posts: 1
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I spent the better part the past two years adoring and being adored, by someone who lives on the opposite coast in the U.S. The last 5 months for me have been difficult in the extreme however, because of a personal melt down, on my part. He distanced himself (emotionally) because, as he stated he was hurt by a venting email I wrote to him, but not about him. Well, I did relate to him that I was unhappy with the shortage of real, up-close contact between us. (At the time I was going through several stressful and distressful experiences with my family, my employment, and a medical situation, and I was scared about the outcomes.) He was the bright light I ran to for almost two years, during which time he became firmly entrenched in my heart, and I know the feelings were mutual. As I understood it, he felt insulted that I was unhappy with our distance issues, and he took my complant as a personal attack, withdrawing from me in what I guess was self preservation.
Shortening my reply... For the past few months I can't help but notice what we don't have anymore, and I am deeply saddened by what has gone missing. My self-preservation devil has taken to sitting on my shoulder. It keeps telling me to accept that we both have been hurt by things said and unsaid - it's time to mourn the loss of the special relationship we had and move on. Neither of us is letting go, but neither have we continued to grow in the relationship.
I believe that long distance relationships can and do work for many people, but I fear I will not be one of those crowing the success of my long distance love. I know now with certainty that I will not place myself in the position of being in a long distance relationship again. I need the tactile and sensory contact with my partner and with a high degree of frequency. The loneliness in the middle of the night, when I need or want to be held can not be alleviated with a telephone call or an email. We can't even break up with a goodbye kiss as the song says...
Let's Just Kiss and Say Goodbye....
YouTube Let's Just Kiss and Say GoodBye
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