| Jun 13 @ 11:55 PM |
Ladies help me understand this
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jdctx
Posts: 225
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First I encourge you to verify what I say is true so that you can fully grasp what my confusion is.
In my example. I want to be specific to those who were at least claim to be searching for a longterm.
Ok so there are 5 pages of men with pictures in a 35 mile radius and 3 pages of women. so more or less there is a 2 to 1 men to women ratio.
I randomly chose 7 profiles of each to read.. Of those I did not fine anything that stood out as bad or outstanding.
So I'm thinking what is it that in a place that gives you so many options that you can't fine your match.
Now I have heard complaints of liars and of course there are just as many female liars in fact I have yet to see evidence baring the extreme psyhos where either has it tougher.
Is it that you have so many choices that it hard to make one..I can sort of see that
I get that way before making big purchase. I over analyze things comparing it in every scenerio.
But even in big purchase if it something I truely want I act, I get it and dont second guess wondering well you know that other item does have some pretty colors to or maybe I'll just wait
For me if the tables were turn I don't think I know you would not see me because I would be with my girlfriend or if my dates just did not work I would continue trying and if too many fail I would not be here.
I feel like a man no water dying of thirst while someone else claiming to be just as thirsty is complaining because the water taste sort of funny.
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| Jun 14 @ 12:00 AM |
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signme
Posts: 12,588
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So what exactly is your question? 
Edited to add: I did a search of the whole of Texas for men within my age limit, 47-65. I got 3 pages but 2 1/2 pages have not been active in 3 months or more. So how does that help me find someone??
[Edited on 6/14/2009 12:06 AM]
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| Jun 14 @ 1:14 AM |
Ladies help me understand this
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jdctx
Posts: 225
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sure signme I have no problem in repeating my question
So I'm thinking what is it that in a place that gives you so many options that you can't fine your match
Now as far as activity and ratios go all things remain as is
AGE does play a HUGE and near perfect ironic factor. but in a lot of my observations I find that women age 40-55 look for younger men. Here and in real life. I don't believe that all are seeking the same but a good percentage who are out there in the active scene are.
most common reasoning is that women live longer then men or that men their age are too set in their ways.
but if we are just a little honest being with someone younger probably make them feel younger. I don't believe that most older women really take their relationship with younger men too seriously.
Now someone could have read my current a previous ads and found it not to stand out. I can find undesputed equals on woman.
One difference as far as options and opporunities go is.
I have never heard of a women who has not received at least one email from a man who at least very closely matched what posted as their want.. The idea that woman don't search and write to ads is false.
I do not post ridiculous requirements nor is my ad offense. Yet I have NEVER I mean NEVER once ever in any and all times on ALL site recieve so much as a hi from a woman that fit at least in the most basics of requirements.
On that I will never be proven wrong because regardless of what I post. Not one women will at least read my ad and say you know I'll give this guy a chance.. Let's see if he is as he claims.
That fact is relevant because on the opposite end in the past I have written women to that according to their ad I did meet their posted requirements. I have never received a reply from a women who even under the most opinionated view I had not reasonably match their basic requirements.
So again to me the questions with all the opportunites that women have they continue to complain of where are all the good men..
I throw in the excuse of too many choices as something perhaps reasonable that makes sense and if thats the case then perhaps they and I just arent on the same page
[Edited on 6/14/2009 1:25 AM]
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| Jun 14 @ 9:05 AM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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Well, first off...I'm 43, and I prefer older men as opposed to younger. So, I don't fit into your category of women between 40-55.
I put a lot of weight on the forums. Where people post, what they say, how they treat others and a consistancy of personality in their postings. This takes time which most of us have on here. So, in my opinion, don't worry about the ratio of men to women. Don't worry about how quickly women respond. Just post, have fun and be yourself. At some point, you will catch someones eye and they will be watching you. Then, you will find that person for you.
At least that is my opinion. 
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| Jun 14 @ 9:37 AM |
Ladies help me understand this
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BandTMom
Posts: 38,063
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So I'm thinking what is it that in a place that gives you so many options that you can't fine your match
So many options??? In Oklahoma???  My options to men that live close to me is one. And I have gone out with him and only time will tell on that one.
As far as you getting responses to your ad, I'm going to be very frank with you since you keep asking for it. You have a very vanilla profile. Nothing in it screams, "Pick me, pick me!!" It's like a thousand other profiles I've read on sites like these. Part of it isn't even filled out. 
I'm not trying to be mean, but that's this woman's POV.
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| Jun 14 @ 9:41 AM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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oct_cat
Posts: 1,374
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Plain & simple, you are trying to use statistics you have come up with to figure out why you can't find a match here.
You're seeming uptight about being here and not "finding" someone. It's rare for that to happen on any dating site, despite what those commercials on tv would have you believe.
Get out of the house, do volunteer work, join a church, get out in society & meet real people, cuz chances of it happening here are slim.
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| Jun 14 @ 9:44 AM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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cuz chances of it happening here are slim.
Nobody told me that! I was lied to! I'm so disillusioned 
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| Jun 14 @ 9:45 AM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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oct_cat
Posts: 1,374
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Nobody told me that! I was lied to! I'm so disillusioned Shhhhh!!! You don't want the others to find this out too!!!
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| Jun 14 @ 9:47 AM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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 Sorry...
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| Jun 14 @ 11:27 AM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,417
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jd, perhaps you can just get in the fun area of threads, and see if someone becomes attracted to you.
I don't even do a search, and have met 5 men from here that were decent, just not right for me.
Give it time.
edited to add, met in person
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| Jun 14 @ 11:32 AM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Jalon
Posts: 1,611
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You're seeming uptight about being here and not "finding" someone.
There it is. THE ANSWER.
I have so much more to say, yet know it's pointless. 
On second thought, I have one thing to add. Quit whining (it's never attractive), put on your "big boy" pants and GET OUT THERE.
Okay, I'm done.
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| Jun 14 @ 11:41 AM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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Jalon....
Not nice 
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| Jun 14 @ 12:20 PM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Carol386
Posts: 3,705
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Angel - it may not be nice but its certainly true
I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for people that sit in front of a computer and expect the love of their life to drop into their lap - the internet is only one of hundreds of tools that are available to people to help them find someone.
You will find it/it will find you when you least expect - it certainly happened that way for me 
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| Jun 14 @ 12:23 PM |
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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I know it was true...I just didn't have the nerve to say it!
But Carol...it was on the internet...right?
[Edited on 6/14/2009 12:26 PM]
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| Jun 14 @ 12:25 PM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Carol386
Posts: 3,705
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Angel, shy and reserved what is this world coming to
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| Jun 14 @ 1:03 PM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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jdctx
Posts: 225
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Plain & simple, you are trying to use statistics you have come up with to figure out why you can't find a match here.
You're seeming uptight about being here and not "finding" someone. It's rare for that to happen on any dating site, despite what those commercials on tv would have you believe.
Yes I am and I does play some roll. If you note the majority of my complaints deal with online only.
Get out of the house, do volunteer work, join a church, get out in society & meet real people, cuz chances of it happening here are slim
Yes it is very slim.
One thing folks here need to understand in that offline I can and do meet women and in my opinion quite a few.
Now when I say meet I mean we exhanged numbers and went out. Most of the time we ended as friends. For a smaller percentage we did go out again a few times. I'm looking at my phone and right now I have 11 numbers of women I will probably delete 3 of 11 since its been a while since we talked. 2 of 11 I date.
another 3 I had dated and the rest we went out and just became friends.
The point is that I have no problem outside the internet in meeting someone. But the situation it is NOT what I want. Many tell me that going out with so many people is the normal process. I dont like it. The problem with my outside world is that I have hard time finding women who are ready for a relationship. All the ones I have meet with a posible exception of 1 current only want something short term. I had hope that those that posted ads on the internet were more serious.
I have meet these women through meetup groups , dancing ( I dance salsa and other latin styles, suprised huh), at a coffee shop I go to regularly and a couple through one that I had dated ( she is one that I became friends with but I stopped doing the setup thing)
So long as I feel that I have the opportunity face to face rejection does not bother me so much. On the internet I don't get that opportunity and it does bother me. I think wow you complain so much of finding a guy that meets your standards. I write an email with sincere intentions get nothing back while you continue to complain. THAT is the part that get me. IF I had been written back and IF through discovery they found something about me that they did not like. For example I like documentaries maybe they hate anything to do with it. Well it would make sense.
I suppose the integrity is a very big deal to me and perhaps more then it should but I can't see giving that up.
One final note to this I dont search for women online any more. When I feel that things have changed enough and if I am ready I will. For now you will only see me on the forums.
Jalon and Angel178 too because you only wish you can said what Jalon said
you can bite me I know enough about you two's online persona to know that you do not intended to help but to use opportunities to bash. I have yet to hear either of you give me well meant advice. If there is a way I can find to put you on some sort of ignore so I did not have to know of your existence on matchdoctor I would. Your comments are more irratants then something that actually bothers me
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| Jun 14 @ 1:26 PM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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Jalon and Angel178 too because you only wish you can said what Jalon said
you can bite me I know enough about you two's online persona to know that you do not intended to help but to use opportunities to bash. I have yet to hear either of you give me well meant advice. If there is a way I can find to put you on some sort of ignore so I did not have to know of your existence on matchdoctor I would. Your comments are more irratants then something that actually bothers me That was just mean and hurtful....now I understand why you are rubbing people the wrong way....
Ok sweetie...to refresh your memory...what I wrote to you was nice...
I put a lot of weight on the forums. Where people post, what they say, how they treat others and a consistancy of personality in their postings. This takes time which most of us have on here. So, in my opinion, don't worry about the ratio of men to women. Don't worry about how quickly women respond. Just post, have fun and be yourself. At some point, you will catch someones eye and they will be watching you. Then, you will find that person for you. I thought that was pretty nice and helpful
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| Jun 14 @ 1:29 PM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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plowman
Posts: 1,283
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yeah, why is everyong always trying to make her out to be a bad-angel...you ppl be nice to angel!
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| Jun 14 @ 1:31 PM |
Ladies help me understand this
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Angel178
Posts: 36,338
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tell him how sweet I am...
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| Jun 14 @ 1:33 PM |
Ladies help me understand this |
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plowman
Posts: 1,283
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she isn't bad...she may be fallen, and that is definately not too bad at all in my book, hey! 
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