| Jul 23 @ 9:23 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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mtgonline
Posts: 4
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What do you think? I mean, it's kind of like shopping and you should just be able to narrow down what you're looking for, right? I hear that it's harder because of too many options and harder because of people lying.
Just wondering if there are different obstacles to finding love when you date online. Anyone have thoughts?
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| Jul 23 @ 9:31 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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ColdinWisconsin
Posts: 9,987
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I think online dating is easier in that people can be who they want to be. That is not to say that they are portraying themselves honestly, just that they can be the person that they know other people are attracted too. It's Halloween every day of the week. They can sit their in their sweats with holes in the crotch, pit stains on their T-shirts and orange Cheeto stains on their fingers while having a college photo posted and talking dirty.
I also think it's easier in that for some, it provides a fantasy relationship that is not based in reality at all. Online, telephone and cam chat are great way to have fun without the realities of having to live together, face conflict or even have to pick up your partners' slack when something comes up.
It's harder in that when you DO think you have found someone you could live with without killing, you are then faced with the distance. And.....the reality of who and what they really are.
Obviously I'm not a proponent of online dating. I say make it real as quickly as possible. Find out if they are someone you can be in a car with for 4 hours without thinking suicidal thoughts. Find out if they do a courtesy flush. Find out if they actually have three kids by different mother's and haven't been paying child support. Find out if they have a criminal record, drinking problem, live with their mother or function eating off of paper plates. Because one man's reality is another woman's hell. (and visa-versa)
By the way....welcome to the forums! 
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| Jul 23 @ 9:34 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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artcat7
Posts: 576
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Yep, options are one of the difficulties with internet dating in my opinion. It's like standing there in a crowd that's rushing by and when either person looks around it's easy to be swept away by the crowd. But then I think that makes it kind of clear that the person who was swept away didn't really know what they wanted. Either that or they barely gave getting to know you a chance in the first place.
Welcome to the forums.
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| Jul 23 @ 9:55 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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AngelLight
Posts: 5,620
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CIW, you are absolutely hysterical ...
....... I say make it real as quickly as possible. Find out if they are someone you can be in a car with for 4 hours without thinking suicidal thoughts. Find out if they do a courtesy flush. Find out if they actually have three kids by different mother's and haven't been paying child support. Find out if they have a criminal record, drinking problem, live with their mother or function eating off of paper plates. Because one man's reality is another woman's hell. (and visa-versa)
 
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| Jul 23 @ 10:09 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,951
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Yes and no. Because of the reasons that CiW stated...but if you are being yourself, it's much harder. I've developed a deep hatred of those girls who whine about "I miss my boyfriend because I haven't seen him in 2 hours".
Marko already knows how I hang around the house all the time (messed up hair in pajama pants), and he does the same thing. So he knows that when he's talking to me he's probably talking to that Renae. We already know we can live together....spent three weeks together and after the thrill of finally being together worn off it just became normal. Our love really deepened, and now the distance really doesn't seem like as much of an obstacle as it was.
It can be a lot easier, if you're pretending. If you're not...then it's not easier. And there is still conflict in long distance relationships...you just have to have the fights over the phone. It doesn't mean they don't get solved; it just means that it's solved differently =)
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| Jul 23 @ 10:10 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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mtgonline
Posts: 4
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I guess the best way to put it is that online dating should become in-real-life dating pretty fast if it's going to become real... right? I've heard a bunch of stories about people writing back and forth -- modern day love letters, i guess -- and when they met in person there were absolutely no "courtesy flushes" to be found. In one story I heard, the woman even started chatting with her boyfriend when he was at work b/c she loved him online, but not so much right in front of her. That seems pretty ridiculous, though... and not fessing up to the truth that their relationship is a no-go.
I guess I'm thinking about all of this b/c one of my sister's and i are trying to get the oldest sister to try it. I think we've laid the groundwork ... we're at least able to talk with her about it without her getting super uptight (she's a pretty type-A, wound-up, finance gal). I think she would be a dream catch for some guy (maybe not the cheetos guy, though...) and i'm trying to come up with ways to steer her through the process so that she doesn't get spooked.
and Thanks so much for the warm welcomes!
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| Jul 23 @ 10:13 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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mtgonline
Posts: 4
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And there is still conflict in long distance relationships...you just have to have the fights over the phone. It doesn't mean they don't get solved; it just means that it's solved differently =)
Having fights over the phone definitely seems difficult. I feel like facial expressions and tone of voice are so so important. How long have y'all been long distance, LGQ?
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| Jul 23 @ 10:31 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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I don't think online dating is easier, per se.
But, it isn't real tough, or many wouldn't be here!
I do agree that meeting soon, getting a "real life feel" for someone is important. Once 2 people know that each other are who they say they are, a relationship can still grow from a distance.
I personally wouldn't want to do that for long once he and I "know." 
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| Jul 23 @ 10:57 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,951
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How long have y'all been long distance, LGQ?
Since the beginning...March of 2008....but we've met three times at this point and we've already got a tentative date for him to return for another visit (March 2010), and a tentative date for him to move over here. The relationship is very solid. People think it's hard to maintain, but it's really not.
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| Jul 23 @ 11:34 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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Merchitown
Posts: 6,129
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LOL oh I've found it's very easy to fight over the phone if not easier! I can throw things where I'm at and not fear for hurting the other person. Of course other bad things occur like getting so distracted that you lock yourself out of the apartment, but eh, that's not important related to how much fun you can have yelling your little heart out. 
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| Jul 23 @ 5:41 PM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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Fender
Posts: 8,474
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In all honesty...Jerks are around in real life and online. You can talk to someone all the time online, then when you go be with them...Things are totally different and you get screwed over...You end up just being friends, or worse...Nothing.
Then again, I've seen people on here who have met their mates online and it's worked out perfectly...So I'd say 50/50. All depends on you, who you meet and how it goes and flows.
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| Jul 23 @ 7:50 PM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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Angel178
Posts: 36,290
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I can't add anymore. All of these comments are very well said! 
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| Jul 23 @ 10:03 PM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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blueyes101
Posts: 12,031
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Obviously I'm not a proponent of online dating. I say make it real as quickly as possible. Find out if they are someone you can be in a car with for 4 hours without thinking suicidal thoughts. Find out if they do a courtesy flush. Find out if they actually have three kids by different mother's and haven't been paying child support. Find out if they have a criminal record, drinking problem, live with their mother or function eating off of paper plates. Because one man's reality is another woman's hell. (and visa-versa)
Hey, I think I passed this test....... 
There are many times in life, you could get along great with someone who was sitting at the next table in McDonald's, IF you were to ever talk with them.
Here online, there can be a whole conversation going with 2-10 people, and all you have to do is chime in, much harder to do that in real life, so you can actually start to get to know people, just by their comments, this is much harder to do in the real world.
Well, without letting them think you are eavesdropping on the conversation..  
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| Jul 24 @ 1:37 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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indecipherable
Posts: 546
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online dating isn't dating, so real dating is the winner. The point of a date, is to meet up with someone. If you only see someone a few times a year, how can you call that dating?
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| Jul 24 @ 1:40 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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chubs
Posts: 2,452
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with some of the wimmenz online, I'd call that pretty lucky for poor ol' chubs 
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| Jul 24 @ 8:41 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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Angel178
Posts: 36,290
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online dating isn't dating, so real dating is the winner. The point of a date, is to meet up with someone. If you only see someone a few times a year, how can you call that dating?
Oh boy... 
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| Jul 24 @ 9:51 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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I understand what Inde means.
It goes along with what I said- "I" wouldn't want to do a LDR for a long time.
Everyone is diff. 
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| Jul 24 @ 10:10 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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Gallows_Humor
Posts: 13,646
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I can understand him....but why is he so negative..???
the transition between on line.dating and real life is the hard part for some... (as it should be... how one deals with it is what is "different",, to say that this is not real is just .....  ,,,,, 
There are many times in life, you could get along great with someone who was sitting at the next table in McDonald's, IF you were to ever talk with them.
Here online, there can be a whole conversation going with 2-10 people, and all you have to do is chime in, much harder to do that in real life, so you can actually start to get to know people, just by their comments, this is much harder to do in the real world.
Well, without letting them think you are eavesdropping on the conversation..
very astute.... 
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| Jul 24 @ 10:26 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating?
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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why is he so negative We all get that way once in a while. Inde is a very nice man-as are you. 
This I would like to pick apart FROM MY VIEW ONLY
all you have to do is chime in, much harder to do that in real life, so you can actually start to get to know people, just by their comments, this is much harder to do in the real world. When I get in a big group, I like to listen and watch. If I have something to add, I'm not afraid to do so! It seems most groups I have been in have been large ones-I love to people watch! I do that here, also, but talk more. In small groups I chime in just as much.
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| Jul 24 @ 11:08 AM |
Is online dating is easier than regular dating? |
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,951
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online dating isn't dating, so real dating is the winner. The point of a date, is to meet up with someone. If you only see someone a few times a year, how can you call that dating?
You're allowed your opinion, but we all don't see it that way. It's not a universal truth. If you don't like it don't do it.
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