| Jan 14, 2006 @ 3:34 PM |
Forgiveness |
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spongebob777

Posts: 7,904
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Ive been thinking about forgiveness and realized that I'm able to forgive some pretty serious screwups in a relationship. For me I think the big one was a girlfriend who left only to return pregnant a few weeks later. Little ones would be things like lying about her past.
Anybody else have any things they can or can't forgive?
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 3:37 PM |
Forgiveness |
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Classy_Blonde

Posts: 6,034
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I hold grudges. I'll be back. Have to think about this.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 3:49 PM |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR

Posts: 13,813
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well...I forgave the fella who disappeared on our weddin` day..
I forgave my dearly departed husband for cheating on me on our wedding night
lets see I forgave the father of my oldest son for running out on me when he found out i was pregnant
and the list goes on.............really i find no reason to hold a grudge...the past is just that..the past
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 3:52 PM |
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johnw_6

Posts: 194
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I'm not good on forgiveness.
I expect alot but I also offer that - for me it comes down to setting rules and sticking to them otherwise you'll just be talked on.
If it's clear at the beginning then you know where you stand when thins go wrong. We're not perfect but it's the degrees of a mistake which dictate how important you are to that person.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:07 PM |
Forgiveness |
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Pete73052

Posts: 19,370
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I'm not into forgiveness. Dancing on someone's grave is a big part of what keeps me going on a daily basis.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:11 PM |
Forgiveness |
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crackerchickie

Posts: 448
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Mah, I forgive pretty easily I think. Now forgetting, that's a different matter.
I love the story about that woman that found out her boyfriend was unfaithful, so she glued his penis to his leg. Assaultive, yes. Horrible, yes. And kinda funny too, in a sick little way.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:20 PM |
Forgiveness |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR

Posts: 13,813
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I'm not into forgiveness. Dancing on someone's grave is a big part of what keeps me going on a daily basis
I can't argue with a sick mind
I forgive rude people
[Edited on 1/14/2006 4:21 PM]
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:27 PM |
Forgiveness |
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mangolover60

Posts: 635
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well...I forgave the fella who disappeared on our weddin` day..
I forgave my dearly departed husband for cheating on me on our wedding night
lets see I forgave the father of my oldest son for running out on me when he found out i was pregnant
and the list goes on.............really i find no reason to hold a grudge...the past is just that..the past
Wow Tink, I can get away with all that? You wanna go out?
Seriously, I'm pretty forgiving as well. I forgave the "extra" sex, temper tantriums, and heart breakings. Tink is right on in my book, past is past, let's get on with the future.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:31 PM |
Forgiveness |
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spongebob777

Posts: 7,904
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I think crackerchickie is onto something with the forgetting part.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 4:31 PM |
Forgiveness |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR

Posts: 13,813
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Wow Tink, I can get away with all that? You wanna go out?
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 5:11 PM |
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ladyraindove74

Posts: 290
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“You will know that forgiveness has begun when you recall those who hurt you and feel the power to wish them well.”
One can forgive, but it's not always easy to forget....however, I've found that letting the past be just that, the past, makes it easier to forgive. No one can go back and change any of their actions, and we are human...some more than others...
Here's a quote... “Men forget but never forgive. Women forgive but never forget.” Kind of fits here I think...
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 5:36 PM |
Forgiveness |
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Roanin

Posts: 300
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With the exception of hurting my son, I can forgive anything. A Bhuddist Monk once explained to me about "HATE"..He said there was no point in it. 90% of the people you hate, don't even know it and the other 10%, know and don't care. I believe that if you hold grudges, all it does is eat you up inside. That's why, in my mind, the best revenge ever to have on another person, is to be happier and live better without them.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 5:57 PM |
Forgiveness |
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spongebob777

Posts: 7,904
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I believe that if you hold grudges, all it does is eat you up inside.
Yeppers. Looking back at some of the things that made me angry I can often find at least some ammount of blame in myself anyway. It's easier to look at those things as learning experiences and move on.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 7:40 PM |
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AngelLight

Posts: 5,620
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I have been able to and do forgive others, although it is certainly not always an easy thing. But what I've found is that when I do forgive, not just in my mind but with my total being, I am free of the bondage that might prevent me from loving more deeply, and loving deeply is such a part of who I am that I would not jeopardize changing that about myself.
I am also free from judging another as "less than this" or "less than that". I know that everyone has "a story" and a history and that often what people do is a result of their unresolved pain or hurt. I do not mean to say that people are not accountable for what they say or do, I mean to say that understanding or knowing their story gives me the room to be compassionate....to have empathy, with the desire to alleviate suffering.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 7:54 PM |
Forgiveness |
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chinabull2000

Posts: 7,012
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I rarely forgive, I never forget, and I usually get payback!
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 7:58 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower

Posts: 18,602
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believe that if you hold grudges, all it does is eat you up inside
Roanin!
However, that doesn't mean that I'll stick around for more.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 8:04 PM |
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rebelgirl443

Posts: 2
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I forgive because if I did something I would want to be forgiven.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 8:05 PM |
Forgiveness |
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Classy_Blonde

Posts: 6,034
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Holding grudges doesn't eat me up. Hatred certainly does though. I don't see them as necessarily being related.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 8:18 PM |
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Roanin

Posts: 300
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to you Angellight!!!! Sometimes people see women like us and think we are weak.. I do not..I see that we have compassion and yes..empathy for our fellow human beings. I always try to see the other side of things and you are so very right, in that, sometimes the past does dictate our reactions to certain things. I try every day to overcome the wrongs done me and to continue to try and be the best human being that I can be.
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| Jan 14, 2006 @ 9:31 PM |
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AngelLight

Posts: 5,620
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And you are Roanin, you are
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