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Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?


Aug 3, 2010 @ 3:18 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Always_Striving


Posts: 9,953
Lately I've had several clients where the woman has a higher paying job than her husband.

Hospital administrator,
Vice president of corporation loans,
Auto dealer principal,
Franchise gas station and retail shop owners.

It isn't long thereafter when I meet her husband and when I ask him what he does for a living I hear that he has a job that pays much less.

In all of the examples the woman either does not have any children or in a few cases she has 1 child.

I have heard that women prefer that their spouses make more than they do.
I've also heard that women often leave their husbands in preference to other men who make higher incomes closer to their own if not more.
"Water seeks its own level theory".

So now I must ask all of you what arrangement do you believe is more important in a marriage - the man making more money or the woman making more money?

Explain why you believe the "bread winner" should be the woman or the man.
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 3:23 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
lj450


Posts: 8,892
The man puts the yeast on the table, the woman brings yeast to bed.



Same as its always been.


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Aug 3, 2010 @ 3:40 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
daisy315


Posts: 7,119
doesn't really matter as long as both are working.. my neighbor is living with a guy that refuses to work.. he thinks he can make a living shooting pool .. but when he needs the funds to enter these pool tourneys, he has his hand out for her bank card.. I have no respect for a man that is CAPABLE of working but doesn't.. if there are small children involved, then I guess it would depend on child care arrangments ( does one parent need to be at home..)
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 5:37 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
signme


Posts: 16,691
I don't think it matters all that much. In most cases, I've made more money than the guys I've dated. So? As long as we liked each other and had a good time together, it didn't matter who made more money.

As for marriage, I think it would be the same. However it would matter if one didn't like their job for whatever reason. That makes a person unhappy and both people need to work harder to keep a marriage going if one person is unhappy all the time. If both people enjoy their jobs, are willing to work hard at the job and the marriage, it should not matter who makes more money.
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 5:50 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
daisy315


Posts: 7,119
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 6:01 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Loinlee_Sole


Posts: 9,833
he who makes the bread.........buys the butter
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 9:06 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Snappygoddess


Posts: 5,740
he who makes the bread.........buys the butter

Nope.. he who makes the bread....MAKES the butter
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 9:27 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
SensualGemini


Posts: 13,986


...Raised traditional, all my life, I would be embarrassed if my wife had to work. Now, if she wanted to work, that is different, but unlikely she would earn more than I am capable of.

...After you have enough for the "bread," does it matter? I think most women like the independence of their money to do their nails, their hair, their clothes and yes, to buy you a gift without in a sense, you buying your own gift.

...In the end, it is up to the couple to decide. If one leaves the other over how much one makes, I would find it difficult to believe they were ever in love to begin with.


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Aug 3, 2010 @ 9:57 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Loinlee_Sole


Posts: 9,833
i use oleo
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:06 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
newlife2006


Posts: 2,097
The problem with a marriage where traditional gender roles are leveled or reversed is that the guy usually feels denied social submission from his wife, not realizing that traditionally higher position of a man in marriage was based on men being sole providers . It's like male employee would be demanding from female personnel to treat him as employer ( for no other reason than him having external genitals) and not realizing that unless he accepts responsibility of paying them salary his claim is hardly reasonable. Those guys constantly complain that they "don't get respect" from their wives. Naturally , such marriages don't last long . Though , in my observation, it's not women who file for divorce because their spouses make less , but it's more often than not husbands want out of the marriage where they don't get "respect" which men traditionally were entitled to. As they put it - they "are not treated like men" ...
When some of them remarry later - they usually get themselves a woman less educated than they are, who's earning less then they do and it seems to work perfectly well. As soon as they have a wife who has a reason to look up at her husband , the guy's ego is satisfied and they live happily ever after ...
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:12 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
jaybird777


Posts: 894
I got externalized genitalias. The rest was over my head.
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:13 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
SensualGemini


Posts: 13,986
NewLife: It's like male employee would be demanding from female personnel to treat him as employer ( for no other reason than him having external genitals)

...Well geez NewLife, if that concerns you, we will get you a strap on for the days you feel insecure.

...Don't you be blowing kisses at me after that judgment call.

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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:23 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
newlife2006


Posts: 2,097
Are you mixing medications, SG ? ... Or do you mean you don't have external genitals?... Most men do , in case you are not aware ...
You really make me wonder why are you so in denial of this fact of nature...
Relax , no matter how insecure you are about yourself in this department , you cannot possibly have internal genitals anyway or.... do you?...
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:31 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
robodad


Posts: 9,248
Are you mixing medications, SG ? ... Or do you mean you don't have external genitals?... Most men do , in case you are not aware ...
There she goes, stereotyping us men again....not all of us mix medication, yanno
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:35 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
newlife2006


Posts: 2,097
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 10:57 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
SensualGemini


Posts: 13,986
NewLife: You really make me wonder why are you so in denial of this fact of nature...

...Certainly not from your attempts to put people in some nice neat slot you have perceived and certainly not from your ongoing examples of attempted emasculation, of which I am certain you attempt with every man.

...Like most idiot men, you confuse kindness, compassion, empathy with being weak and nothing could be further from the truth for some men.

...Understand it well, that just because a human is born with exterior genitals, it does not make him a man any more than one born with internal makes her a lady.

...Because I don't subscribe to the traditional roll you conclude your opinion is from, including religion, I am suddenly emasculated?

...If you are around me and you feel like you are being controlled, it is only because you chose to do so by default of incapable of making your own decisions, or you have a need to control others from your insecurity of needing to prove something, or you trust me enough to make the right decisions.

...Traditional is dividing responsibilities by preference, by choice. One is not any less important than the other, as they all need to be done and I have done them all; including raising children, cooking, cleaning and building multi-story buildings or raising thousands of animals.

...There is only one thing that controls me and that is love, for which it controls everyone. Maybe you should find a better type of man to associate with, or continue wearing that strap on and continue acting like a male with the little man syndrome.


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Aug 3, 2010 @ 11:03 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Loinlee_Sole


Posts: 9,833
what about those who have no genitals ???
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 11:08 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
Angel178


Posts: 32,075
Just jump him Newlife...you know you want to
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Aug 3, 2010 @ 11:19 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
SensualGemini


Posts: 13,986

Loinlee: what about those who have no genitals ???

...Well, that would not be good, but I suppose we could call you "Loinleaf."


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Aug 3, 2010 @ 11:34 PM Who should be the "bread winner" in a marriage the man or the woman?    
newlife2006


Posts: 2,097
Are you talking to me , SG ?...
Where does your overreaction to my post come from? How come natural fact that men and women differ physiologically brings you to conclusions like :

your attempts to put people in some nice neat slot
.Like most idiot men, you confuse kindness, compassion, empathy with being weak
...I don't subscribe to the traditional roll you conclude your opinion is from, including religion..
I am ...emasculated?..a male with the little man syndrome.

There must be some reason you take my observations so personally. Seems like you consider yourself to be one of those guys I was talking about..

.If you are around me
you should find a better type of man to associate with

Amen to this , brother ...



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