| Feb 25, 2006 @ 2:08 PM |
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Dad2Four44
Posts: 56
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Ok....got an email from someone wanting to know my income. In my profile, I don't state what range my income is because truthfully, I don't think it's anybody's business up front and I also don't feel like it should make a difference. I guess what I'm saying is, I don't want someone to look at me based on my income.
What Say You?
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 2:10 PM |
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spongebob777
Posts: 7,904
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I just tell everybody I'm poor right from the start. If they show any interest after that then it must be real.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 2:18 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 15,360
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Dad -
Sounds like a good way of weeding out the ones you wouldn't be interested in anyway...kind of the flip side of Sponge's remark. I think you're right though, no reason for the world to know and frankly, if she asked that before anything else, if I were you I'd be saying no thank you in a heartbeat.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 2:21 PM |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,792
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I don`t list mine either..if their interested they can ask..although one guy got pretty irate and  told me I was required to have all information on profile..Like I said all they have to do is ask..
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 2:27 PM |
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Dad2Four44
Posts: 56
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I won't even say if I'm asked. I think without saying what exactly my income is, I do state in my profile and blogs that my family is taken care of...is that what really counts?
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:15 PM |
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the_real_me_ok
Posts: 293
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I've always thought that question was a bit invasive but it's there to be answered only by the people who want to answer it I guess, just like other questions on the profile. I'm happy to answer questions once I get comfortable with someone, meaning if I think that person is going to be a friend, or we will keep in contact to some extent....but just to post my income on my profile, that to me is too personal. Whether I make $20,000 a year or $120,000 a year is my business, until I decide to make it someone else's business. That's just my opinion 
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:18 PM |
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jazzy73703
Posts: 73
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that's sad, basing who you go out with on their income. Talk about money hungry!
Jazzy
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:23 PM |
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Dad2Four44
Posts: 56
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maybe because I don't advertise my income is reason some won't give me a second thought.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:30 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 15,360
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some won't give me a second thought.
Dad, do you really want them to? You make it clear that you make 'enough'. You're employed and self-sustaining. If a relationship develops to the point where you're considering marriage, then fine, cards on the table, it's both your futures to be considered. But would you really be interested in a woman who needs to know how much you make to consider going out with you???
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:35 PM |
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Dad2Four44
Posts: 56
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no, I don't want a woman like that...I'm just surprised some on how brash some people can be.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 5:40 PM |
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MotownManiax
Posts: 7,881
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Spongy, I not only tell everybody I'm poor, but short, fat, bald, sexually dysfunctional, live with parents, collect Star Wars memorabilia, have a rash the size of Phode Island, worships the Genius of Lawrence Welk, thinks Bemuda shorts/knee-high black socks the height of fashion, inveterate Disney film crier, honorary Ford Fiesta Car Club member, velvet Elvis artwork insured, and, last but not least, card-carrying member of the Osama bin Laden Appreciation Society (American Chapter).
If some woman still finds me attractive, I reject HER!!
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 6:35 PM |
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altogirl67
Posts: 1,309
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I can fully understand the problem with asking about income. It's very private information that should not be shared until a bit later. It does put one in mind of gold diggers... someone who is looking for a check rather than a soul mate and I know there a lot of those types out there (and on here). And it is COMPLETELY inappropriate to ask for that information on a dating site! Just as it is inappropriate to ask for jean size (yes, I've been asked that several times), but that's a different story altogether. 
That said, I also think that income is relevant early in getting to know one another (certainly not before you've met!) so that informed decisions can be made as to whether to continue. I do quite well by myself and will get everything I want monetarily in this life by my own means no matter how hard I have to work for it. Because of my independence, I am concerned with a potential relationship partner's income simply because I am not looking for someone to support. I think he should be able to contribute equally to the nest if there are two birds living in it, just as I think it's only fair to contribute my share. I was raised in a house where my mom worked her butt off to feed us while my dad... didn't. I will never live that kind of existence... ever.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 6:57 PM |
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sweetniki
Posts: 117
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I don't put my income and I don't care about any one else's income. That is NOT what I want from a relationship. Now if they want to post how well they kiss, that I'd take notice of. 
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 7:14 PM |
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luvshorses644
Posts: 1,566
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I don't believe anyone should have to tell their income if they do not want to and I feel it is, indeed, rude for someone to just email another "out of the blue" and ask that question, especially if your profile states that you are employed and your family is taken care of.
With that said, if a relationship develops, then the question of income can and should come up on both parties behalfs. I think this is a necessary discussion so that both parties in the relationship are comfortable in the knowledge that neither are being "played" for the sake of having a place and someone that will take care of them.
I can see my hate mail now, but I have had many friends, both male and female alike, that have had such experiences and my last relationship was along the same lines. As much as most claim that money is not an issue with them, when the relationship is imbalanced, and one party feels all the pressure of having to be the sole provider, this will cause issues; especially, if the other partner does not have an income and is not interested in obtaining employment to help while living under the same roof. I think that might be the reason many ask about employment. (However, I do believe that asking about income in a first or preceeding email before you even meet and get a feel about the possibility of a relationship is way outta line and even rude).
This was just an attempt to see a different view and by all means should not be construed as the way anyone else could, should or world behave. This is my opinion solely and not meant to cause any other individual any type of hurt or disapproval. I just think that instead of getting upset over someone's ignorance or trepidation, we might try to understand why they feel the need to ask. We can always politely say that as long as we are employed and our family taken care of .. the issue of the amount of income is moot.
Just MHO.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 7:46 PM |
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MotownManiax
Posts: 7,881
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I don't mind a woman asking about my income, it makes the weeding out process that much quicker.
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 9:22 PM |
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crackerchickie
Posts: 448
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I automatically assume that people are interested in that $ amount after I tell them what I do.
In fact, we are targeted by the population we work with because there is such a wage disparity. We are either hit on, or sued. No kidding. It is so bad that we are not allowed to have community members into our living quarters. People see the lab coats and get the money idea.
Mind you, if I see some guy's profile that says he makes 100000+ a year, I know he's either stupid or full of s***.
And I don't mind posting what I made last year, as I am never dating again. $215000 Canadian. I think that's, what, $50 American?
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| Feb 25, 2006 @ 11:20 PM |
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torees121
Posts: 739
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I don't care to let others know how much money I make. I would however not ask someone the same question.
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| Feb 26, 2006 @ 1:56 AM |
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UnconventionalCreativity
Posts: 664
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If she asked you abruptly about your income, without a hello, or anything before the income question, I suggest you just not interest yourself too much in her. It's obvious that she's out for one thing. You can do much better, trust me.
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| Feb 26, 2006 @ 2:01 AM |
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RAKS37
Posts: 611
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didn't think much about it when I did my profile
seemed like a simple question
I answered it
does seem like a strange thing to put in the profiles though
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| Feb 26, 2006 @ 2:41 AM |
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Solitaire
Posts: 1,140
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Sheesh...I don't even tell my family my income.
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