| Mar 7, 2006 @ 10:03 AM |
Old pix....
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SanctuaryAeternal
Posts: 1
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Yes, some pix are ridiculously old in the profiles. The 'tease' pic displays someone that is 150 lbs lighter than the 4 recent pix inside the profile. Tis admirable that some people are honest, but to those who wish to deceive, for one reason or another....do they truly believe that another won't be disappointed when they finally arrive at their present appearance?!?!? The feeling of betrayal often closely follows the disappointment, making the future relationship doomed from the start, even if the potential mate feels okay about the excess weight. But, I do know that some people have great difficulty receiving even ONE response from an ad. Perhaps the shortlived 'success' of their profile, & the ability to interact with the opposite sex, is a tiny gift, a fleeting moment when they feel like someone genuinely wishes to be with them. The resurrection of the time 20 years ago, when things were very different, & lacking the hopeless emotion inside. All the more reason to continue with the deception tomorrow....in hopes that they may experience that brief, enjoyable time again.....feeling wanted, needed.
But....that brief moment of joy equates to a negative emotion & experience to the person on the other end. Making one more wary & untrusting of others, initially. After being force-fed the age-old lesson that we shouldn't judge others by their appearance, the 'victim' is made to feel that they lack something inside of themselves, for they should be open to ALL persons. Not true....when one finds themselves single again, it is perfectly fine to require certain things of your potential mate. Emotionally, intellectually, AND physically.
I came under fire from women who were insulted by my solitary, physical reuirement of a nice tummy. I'm sure the mails were from those who didn't qualify....but, what is the difference from wanting a guy with a shaved head or a woman that is height/weight appropriate? The profiles, in part, are there to advertise.....to advertise what u are, & what u want/need!
Congrats to those who use 'truth in advertising' !!!
If another is hurt by what we 'advertise'....it is best to hurt another thru honesty, rather than by deceit.
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| Mar 16, 2006 @ 8:35 PM |
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LouA
Posts: 38
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If another is hurt by what we 'advertise'....it is best to hurt another thru honesty, rather than by deceit.
Well said, I say.
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| Mar 16, 2006 @ 11:09 PM |
Old pix....
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mandajean
Posts: 4
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I agree 100%. Although the temptation to post an old photo from a better time is there i really feel that it is more important to put up the most current pictures i can. This is not only because it sucks for the person who looks at the picture but it would really suck to have someone think you are one thing, and meet a completely different person. my theory is "whatcha see is whatcha get" if someone doesnt like it they will move on and someone else will come along
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| Mar 22, 2006 @ 2:58 PM |
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chauntra
Posts: 304
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I totally agree. My picture even though not a good one,  is me pure and simple. I dont beleive in lying, because if you do, where is your starting point for getting to know someone....a lie? Not good. Anyway, I agree totally with all the statements in here, honesty is always the best policy.
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| Aug 10, 2006 @ 12:38 PM |
Old pix....
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snowdog171
Posts: 1
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 I totally agree with you. I just recently met someone and they were at least 75 lbs heavier then her pic and didnt even recognize her. she had to approach me or i never would have known it was her. Personally i like larger women. When i hug my lady i want to feel some flesh not bones. But as you stated there was a feeling of betrayal. She had told me she had 14 dates in the last year and each one was her first and last with that person. Guess she hasnt got the clue yet. when i told her that i just wanted to be friends she refused to talk with me anymore. Go figure.
I may not be the best catch but at least im honest. I let them know yes im skinny but i do have a beer belly. I try to be honest to a fault. I also do have an older pic up of myself but i actually have lost weight since and my face hasnt changed....sep for a little more gray. But i let everyone know right off the bat that it is an older pic and will turn on my webcam if they want to see me. I am not trying to hide anything. I dont have any newer pics that arent with my kids 5 and 7 and i will be damned if im gonna have pics of them on a dating site. It is also true we shouldnt judge others by apearance but at the same time lets be honest when looking for a life partner there does have to be an attraction. Well guess thats my two cents worth. 
[Edited on 8/10/2006 12:48 PM]
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| Aug 11, 2006 @ 8:41 PM |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,792
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 My pix are fairly new...the one on here now was just taken 2 weeks ago... 
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| Aug 15, 2006 @ 7:42 PM |
Old pix....
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graceful50
Posts: 169
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I hear you there. I was at a restaurant waiting for this thin long red hair guy and this guy approached me with dark blonde, a hat on (yes, balding on top, rest tied into a pony tail) big guy with glasses. If he would not have said my name I would not have had a clue he was my date. He looked completely unlike his photo. Now he is still on the site and has changed his age, birth sign, and his physique he now has down as athletic! HUH?  
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