| May 17, 2007 @ 5:45 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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jm59801
Posts: 3
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Or maybe a wannabe lawyer? :)
Just curious on how it is decided on who gets primary custody of children?
Can a mother be ordered to pay child support the same as the father would? Thinking the answer is yes.
Remember reading somewhere that men are getting custody more and more these days? Keeping my fingers crossed this is true.
...anyway, just looking for some free advice. At some point in the future I believe (heck, I know) I am going to be needing to get a lawyer, and don't want to walk into things with either my hopes too high or ignorant of the possibilities as far as custody goes. Staying put in the marriage for now, the chance of ending up a 'weekend' dad is just too great for me to chance it.
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| May 17, 2007 @ 6:53 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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blueyes101
Posts: 12,080
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Not sure, but it depends on the laws of your state, the judge hearing the case, the lawyers who represent each of you, the age of the children. ( sometimes their opinion matters ). And the reasons for said divorce. Just for starters. And who gets the house,ect........Schools, extended family...
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| May 17, 2007 @ 8:29 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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LSU79
Posts: 323
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a lot is going to depend on the state you're in.
Have you looked into joint custody? Here in GA, the parents pay each other support in that case, so if they're incomes are roughly equal, the payments are zeroed out. But, more importantly, you're not just a weekend dad, but you're raising the child too. The court will usually let you work out any arrangement that works, ours is one week each, holidays are divided up and swapped year to year, and each has a right to 2 weeks vaca a year with them. IMHO, it's the best solution for a bad problem.
But, I'm not a lawyer, talk to one in your state, or go online, you need all the info. you can get.
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| May 17, 2007 @ 8:37 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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Aztec848
Posts: 181
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jm
The best advise that I can give is .Exhaust All Options...Then look again!! Together, seek some professional counseling, which ever is best for you guy's. Then look again!! If either isn't willing ...go alone. Keep your childrens best interest first at ALL TIMES...No matter what!. Speak to the best lawyer you can swing financially..for .there is a definite correlation to the outcome.
You obviously love or loved her at sometime....If you seek full custody you must be willing to FIGHT tooth-n-nail. You will take no prisoners. After all that .. . You just might have a chance. Always remember ..Your childrens interest ALWAYS comes first.
My hope is you guy's will see this to a happy end! Best of Luck
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| May 20, 2007 @ 9:05 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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Loreli
Posts: 25,413
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A lot depends on the actions of each parent also.
True-it seems Moms usually get custody (especially of the very young), but more and more fathers are fighting harder to be custodial parent.One of my friends here got custody of his daughter simply by telling the court that his wife was a good parent-he was just a better one. The judge was impressed that he wouldn't "stoop".
And he WAS a good Dad. Just be a good Dad, and if she is not being a good mom, keep notes. If you do go through with it, consult with a couple attorneys before picking one. Good luck.
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| May 20, 2007 @ 9:06 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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twotall911
Posts: 13,048
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Federal law says yes but it has to be determined by the judge you are assigined too and the circumstances in the case
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| May 28, 2007 @ 1:32 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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painter007
Posts: 17,854
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you need to find a attorney who specializes in fathers rights......There really is no reason a mom should have the majority of custody time.......Men need more time and rights.
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| May 28, 2007 @ 1:52 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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NatGoat
Posts: 4,213
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I'm Hip to That, *P* . . !!
I've been kept away from my youngest Son for Several years . . !!!
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| May 28, 2007 @ 1:53 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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john33142
Posts: 97
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Bottem Line in most cases it's who pay the lawyer the most the wins....or more so which lawyer give the judge the largest cut.. Don't laugh ..
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| May 28, 2007 @ 11:59 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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SensualGemini
Posts: 6,920
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...JM, I edited this to include a book I will upload later (AOL is down for some reason), that maybe you should read first. It is far better to avoid a divorce if at all possible. I have private resale rights, so no copyright issues involved.
Preventing a Divorce
...And no, I don't know you, nor can I conclude that you are the better parent, should a custody issue take place. The best custody results I ever saw, is where the kids stayed in the same house and the parents alternated 6 months at a time, with visitation in between. No duplicate stuff for the kids and their life remained reasonably stable.
...I have raised four sons alone for the past 15 years and I got to tell you, the judge is God and your attorney better be not just good, but the best. Attorneys love custody battles, as the opposed clients are emotionally passionate.
...If you check groups on Yahoo, there are a couple for men and divorce, custody for men, single fathers, etc.
...Without a doubt, custody is still awarded to women by a much higher percentage.
Here are some links that may help you:
[Edited on 5/29/2007 12:32 AM]
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| Jun 28, 2007 @ 12:14 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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LittleMsDangerous
Posts: 11,346
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Bottem Line in most cases it's who pay the lawyer the most the wins....or more so which lawyer give the judge the largest cut..
tsk tsk, obviously you had a bad lawyer, or a good lawyer with bad facts to work with. 
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| Jul 2, 2007 @ 12:20 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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daisy315
Posts: 4,946
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when sis and her hubby split, she moved across the road from him.. her son was still very young then.. but when he got older, he got to see his dad anytime he wanted to.. all he had to do was walk across the road.. there were no fights about who was custodial parent.. basically because her ex didn't want custody of him.. his partying and single life was more important at that time and he was definitly NOT a suitable parent at the time. the only prob sis had was getting her child support.. she went for years without getting any. The judge settled that for her.. finally..
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| Jul 2, 2007 @ 1:36 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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katydid438
Posts: 8,023
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I toughed it out until my son reached the age to make a legal decision,,,,needed a kevlar body suit at times but i worked a lot of call in to the OR so I wasn't in the line of fire that much in the last few years of the marriage,( my son was never in danger)....it's all in the planning and how much you can tolerate.
What doesn't kill you makes you strong  of course the laws in Canada are much different,,,but pretty good for the mother or the most suitable parent.
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| Jul 9, 2007 @ 6:22 PM |
Is there a lawyer in the house? |
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Microchip
Posts: 481
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Or maybe a wannabe lawyer? :) I have been through this, so I can speak on my experiences only, and not as a qualified attorney.
Just curious on how it is decided on who gets primary custody of children? Unless you can agree on JOINT custody (ahead of time), the woman ALWAYS gets custody, unless you can somehow prove that she is unfit. That is like trying to prove the world is flat.
Can a mother be ordered to pay child support the same as the father would? Yes, if she relinquishes custody
...anyway, just looking for some free advice. At some point in the future I believe (heck, I know) I am going to be needing to get a lawyer, and don't want to walk into things with either my hopes too high or ignorant of the possibilities as far as custody goes. Staying put in the marriage for now, the chance of ending up a 'weekend' dad is just too great for me to chance it. My heart goes out to you, man!
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| Jul 11, 2007 @ 9:20 AM |
Is there a lawyer in the house?
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simplegal873
Posts: 141
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Well I have seen the custody thing go either way (to the mother or the father) or joint, depending on whats best for the child(ren). The non-custodial parent is usually responsible for paying child support to the custodial parent, unless there is some sort of substantial valid reason why they cannot support their child(ren). Every case is different and the norms will vary from state to state depending on the laws where you are.
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