| Nov 1 @ 4:27 AM |
i would like to know why...
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doc65270
Posts: 831
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ok i am in a relationship with my ex-wife things are going very well for us except for one thing. she is jealious of a woman she has never met talked to or had any kiind of contact with. she gets pissed everytime i have contact with this woman in any shape matter or form. so my question is why can't people have friends of the opposite sex with out people thinking that someone is in it for the sex. and this other gal is married and i am friends with his also. last night she called and asked me to drive my truck and follow them around town while the kids trick or treet. so i said fine i can do that. she wanted a man with so that they didn't have to worry about some one bothering them. which i can understand that. i stayed in my truck and followed them around town and when they was done i went home. upon talking to my girlfriend after i got home she got all pissy about this other gal wants to jump my bones. this is not the first time we argued because of this gal. last year a couple times when i went to the stock car races her and her daughter went with me because she don't want to walk back to her car in the dark. her hubby knew about it and didn't have a problem with it so why should this girlfriend of mine have a problem with it??? i mean i paid my way she paid for her and her daughter. i have never been with this woman with out her daudghter being around and last night there was like 7 kids and three adult women this is so reducilious to me its pethetic. what do you think??
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| Nov 1 @ 10:20 AM |
i would like to know why... |
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simplylindylu
Posts: 280
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Well, Doc..... personally I think I'd have a problem w/it too, mainly cause I don't know this other person, and mainly cause she has a husband, why isn't he doing the stuff shes asking you do help her with? As for last night, 3 adults, 7 kids, sorry but I don't see the reasoning for you following them in your truck, if it was her and a kid, yeah I can see it. Maybe while your ex is out over the holidays, you could intro the two of them, maybe she'll see a different side to it. Some men AND women can be territorial when it comes to their partners and relationships. Thats just my view.....
A guy once told me that men and women can't be friends cause the guy is still thinking about how he can get in her pants... can't say I agree w/that, I think in some circumstances men and women can be just friends. hang out, talk, do things together that aren't any fun alone.
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| Nov 1 @ 11:37 AM |
i would like to know why...
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ol_hillbilly
Posts: 414
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Dang, here we go tryin ta figger out what wimmin are thinkin. 
As a person that has had friends of both sexes for most of my life and knowin platonic does exist. I know who I'd be havin thankgiving dinner with.
Only one word , well meybe four, for ya..... Good Luck with that! 
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| Nov 1 @ 2:44 PM |
i would like to know why... |
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laceywiggles2
Posts: 514
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And, here I thought Hili was gonna say Lacey~~~~ Oh well . . . . lol I was going to make him cook anyway . . . . 
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| Nov 1 @ 6:23 PM |
i would like to know why...
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doc65270
Posts: 831
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if hilli is cookin you might get a kid instead of a turkey.
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| Nov 2 @ 1:13 AM |
i would like to know why... |
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ol_hillbilly
Posts: 414
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I'd cook fer bout any or all of ya. Mite be a pig or a kid or fish or "chef's surprise". 
It'd be good tho, or yer money back.
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| Nov 2 @ 3:02 PM |
i would like to know why...
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dachsiemom35
Posts: 33
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It really dont work on women an men just being friends i have found in my life . Most guys at some point get where they want friendship with benefits but no relationship . Id be leary abt that woman asking u what she has . I could understand an sympathize where your girlfriend is coming from . That galls husband shld step in be there for his wife an daughter that makes me kinda wonder if something not quite right there in that home .I have seen this to i seen women use men . I have kinda stoped trying figure it outs the men an women thing . I have been in one relationship was actually engaged to the fella he had female friends it use make me mad when theyd ask him why he was with a ugly gal when he was good looking an cld have better he wld just laugh at it hurt me bad but what ended it he got a 17 yr old girl pregnant when he was 26 yrs old i just cldnt stay arounds . Decided there was better out there ran into several road blocks in way buy i do belive there is someone out there for everyone even me an i may be a lil crooked old lady when it happens an if it does that is okays . But i dont belive women an men just can be friends cause god didnt intend for us to be just friends .
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| Nov 4 @ 11:06 AM |
i would like to know why... |
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LadyEdenMO
Posts: 51
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And of course you can speak for God?
It does stink that people are not always forthcomming and can have ulterior motives. What's sad is believing that everyone does. Must really suck to live in that world.
I'm not nieve enough to believe all humans are good, decent, honest or honorable -but if you're gonna squint at everyone you'll never see the ones that are.
OP, think the suggestion of having your lady meet your friends to attempt to dispell her fears might be a good idea - maybe a BBQ or invite your gal pal along the next time. That might help. Are you putting off plans with your gal pal being there for your friends?
So might a talk to address her fears but it sounds like you might have tried that.
Other than that choices are let her fears and jealousy control your life and give up doing for your friends or just do what you need to do and put up with her reactions but let her problem be just that - her problem.
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| Nov 4 @ 4:45 PM |
i would like to know why...
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dachsiemom35
Posts: 33
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I will bac track a lil of what i said in some instances men an women can just be friends with nothing there i have had friends who are men an they understand there are barriers not cross with me . But have had a few that tryed step over the just friend thing an want friends with benefits . I tried one friendship like that i was falling in love with the guy but i ended it cause i knew he cldnt see me as more than just a friend with benefits . I also got feeling like he was just using me for that one thing . Most have respected that i cant over step just friends unless the guy is open for more cause my heart gets attatched with intimate times . I can handle the times of just doing something like grabing a bite eeat or even just watch tv together . Once your girlfriend meets the gall an gets know her they may become friends an want do things togethers . I got feeling to with the guy that he. tried move it to as friend with beneifits i think he was just using me when no one else had time for hims . Cause itd be 3-4 weeks tween time hearing from him . It wldnt bother me if a guy has women friends but as long as there just friends an that the women dont know intimate things abt him that is only time for concern cause he would walk into the bathrroom with a cple females an i think that was cause to concern since i iwas his gf an he had ask me marry him. Your girlfriend is probally just lil insecure that she going lose u but i dont think she is going lose u mabye with u being one on one where ure closer mabye she will lose that insecurity doc . Cause i do belive being closer can break that insecurity problem .
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| Nov 5 @ 12:23 PM |
i would like to know why... |
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lewtherin
Posts: 3
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Doc, Let me say first of all that I am 67 so I have been around for awhile. I dont know it all and especially women, but this is very typical of alot of women. The most common reason is unsecurity in women make them jealous of women, even ones that they do not know. I know from reason that men can be friends with women without wanting to bed them. I have several women friends some from high school and never have had anything except good good friendship with them, they have all become like sisters to me, and my wife has never had a problem with them. For the women who think that men and women cannot be just friends, I think they need to examine their own self first before makeing any judgemental comments. If they dont believe that a man cannot be friends with a women with out wanting to have sex with her sooner or later are makeing that conclusion on their own thoughts and imaginations. Remember we tend to judge others and othersituations by our own thoughts and ideas. Larry
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| Nov 5 @ 12:27 PM |
i would like to know why...
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simplylindylu
Posts: 280
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Your totally right Larry BUT your making it sound like its just women, remember there are men out there that have the same problem.
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| Nov 5 @ 12:37 PM |
i would like to know why... |
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lewtherin
Posts: 3
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You are correct lyindylu, but the question was ask about a woman. That is why it was addressed so. Larry
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| Nov 7 @ 10:51 PM |
i would like to know why...
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doc65270
Posts: 831
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well women and men can be friends with out sex. just friendship. as for this gals hubby he is a over the road truck driver and he was not home last weekend. if he is not home and she needs help with something she usually calls on me because she knows that with me its only friendship. i should be trusted and if you can't trust me then i don't see how we could have a relationship.
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| Nov 10 @ 1:53 AM |
i would like to know why... |
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jellybean635
Posts: 191
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Ok here is my opinion on this Doc,
I am a person who has more male friends than female, I have had the jealous females get upset with me or with their boyfriends due to the fact that the BF will talk with me and or we do things as friends.
Men and women can be friends without sex, hell I am living proof of that,
Maybe she is just insecure at this point and she feels as if this woman may be taking advantage of you.
Have you tried to sit down and talk with her about how she is feeling?
I wish you well and hope that you can work this out..
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