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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 2:49 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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The reason Im asking this is that I recently got into a strong debate with a 41 year old man, He said and he speaks for all men, "That men "cannot" just be friends with woman, that they look at them as wanting to "lay them" some act on it some dont. But, men no matter who they are, neighbors, in laws, friends husbands, they can't be friends with woman, in the back of their minds they are always hoping that it turns into more." My opinion is that I disagree, I cant believe all men are that shallow. Anyone care to comment?
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:02 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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sail_dancer
Posts: 9,857
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I have many female friends. I see no problem with that.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:04 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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lacyvsq
Posts: 6,161
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I have a lot of men who are just friends -- some married, some single, some co-workers. One once told me that upon meeting a woman, a man will consider whether he would sleep with her. I've done that with most of my men friends -- and if we were alone on a deserted island -- there's probably not a man alive I would not have sex with -- it would just take considerably longer for me to make that decision with some than with others. Considering sex with another does not make a friends only relationship out of the question. Entertaining the idea and obsessing about it and trying to pursue sex probably will.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:17 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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startswthakiss
Posts: 79
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I find that most men say they want to be friends, but once you turn them down for sex they no longer want to talk to you. 
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:21 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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sail_dancer, I dont think "its a problem" but what he was implying was that it is virtually impossible for a man to just look at a woman as a friend, he always sees her as a "sex object"
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:27 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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startswthakiss, i have to say that hasnt happened with me. Maybe its just the shallow kind of men youre meeting. Youre very attractive I can see why men would want to take you to bed. Im not gay either...
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:37 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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lacyvsq- Then you agree, that men can be JUST friends with women...The scenero that you point out certainly changes ones mind if they were stranded of course the nature desire to want to be intimate would be there. We all have the desire to feel needed and wanted by another.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:45 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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keeno
Posts: 2,363
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i have many female friends, mostly coworkers that have become friends, because of that i refuse to have sexual thoughts about them, it's just to distracting. but you are right, when i have turned a friend down for sex it changes the relationship.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 3:56 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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Let me ask you this Keeno, although you refuse to think of your woman friend that way, do the thoughts sometime creep in, if they are in something sexy or a batheing suit, etc. ?
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 4:01 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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keeno
Posts: 2,363
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nope they don't creep in, and some are very attractive...but way off limits to that kind of thinking. i had a male friend at one place i worked, he was married and he made the rudest remarks about co-workers in the locker room, it turned my stomach so much i have never had a problem with not thinking of them like that.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 4:23 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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keeno, its nice to know that there are men out there that respect woman for who they are and that chivalry isnt dead! 
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 5:25 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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midnightthunder
Posts: 236
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Men and women can be friends no doubt, but in some situations there can be a hidden curiosity, which can lead one to ask themselves.."What If".
Of course there are those who use the guise of friendship, for misleading purposes, which can turn trust into something sour.
I have seen in some circumstances where the issue was pursued, with favorable results and also with some not so favorable.
Just have to ask yourself how important the friendship is, and how much value you place on it.
I have have females friends, whom I have a great deal of respect for, so yes men and women can be freinds, they can be great friends.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 7:23 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Synsultry
Posts: 114
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midnightthunder..that was nicely put...and I do agree ...  ] Sure everyone ask themselves "what if" but there is a gut instinct I believe thats in everyone that tells one the truth...some people choose too ignore it, others are smart enough to know it. Thanks for your imput!
[Edited on 4/26/2006 7:40 PM]
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 9:42 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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Jessa
Posts: 117
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Chris Rock said it best...." Guys don't have Platonic friends, OK. We just have 'Women-we-haven't-f***ed-YET!!!'"
[Edited on 4/26/2006 10:10 PM]
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 9:59 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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sjpinatl
Posts: 671
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I find that if an attraction is there on either side it is difficult or impossible. But, I have many male professional friends. Also men I'm not attracted to or vice versa. And of course, gay guys, but that is not what you are talking about.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 10:24 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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Lee_Danger
Posts: 4,517
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I read this in Reader's Digest... it said:
For a man and woman to have a completely platonic relationship, they both have to find the other at least slightly replusive.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 10:30 PM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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There may be a little bit of truth to that, Lee I have four or five very close male friends. Only a few of them has it perhaps been thought about to have sex, but I didn't see them as my choice in sex partner.
Men and women can definitely be just friends.
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| Apr 26, 2006 @ 11:12 PM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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Say_Yes
Posts: 2,223
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Yes, men and women can be friends. I have several female friends and that is what I want in the relationship. Believe it or not, men do want more out of life than good sex on a regular basis.
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| Apr 27, 2006 @ 2:19 AM |
Can men and women be just friends?
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chinabull2000
Posts: 7,012
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It's a load of crap, of course men and women can have platonic friendships without the guy wanting to get laid. Throughout my life my closest friends have usually been women, and my closest friend at the moment is a woman that I "dated" very briefly but decided that I wanted a friendship rather a relationship with.
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| Apr 27, 2006 @ 2:48 AM |
Can men and women be just friends? |
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painter007
Posts: 17,853
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I have 3 very good men friends and only friends..There has not ever been any lovins ....flirting sure but its a different kid of flirting...and yes there is one of them I find very sexy and even wondered how he would be sexually...but I would never cross that line.
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