| Sep 27, 2008 @ 7:39 AM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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Thunderstorms46
Posts: 16
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I mean come on people, I put up a nice profile that I think describes me pretty well and gives people a little insight into what I am looking for and all I get is guys who want a one night stand or a long distance whatever they want to call it, sorry but not into online sex, over the phone sex or any other sex unless I am in a relationship with someone!!!! What happened to all the nice guys who want to get to know someone first or are they all out just looking for whore`s? If anyone can answer this question please let me know, or maybe it`s just me, who knows!
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| Sep 30, 2008 @ 12:50 AM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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buckeye1963
Posts: 66
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You're exactly right. Some people would not know how much of a good time they could have if they just take the time to get to know a person. As for myself, all I ask for is a nice smile and a good laugh, and a pleasant disposition. I look way beyond the outside and you really can tell a lot by looking into a person's eyes. I read your profile, and it sounds just fine to me. Whitewater rafting, eh? I can't swim, so I don't spend much time in boats or on the water.
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| Oct 2, 2008 @ 4:19 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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JenRNinOhio
Posts: 4,161
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Unfortunately, many guys (maybe women, too) look only as far as the picture .... Never even reading the intro of the profile.
I have no explanation for this.
Laziness?
Even though my opening line CLEARLY states that I am NOT LOOKING I continued to get emails, many of which leaned strongly toward a sexual nature.
Even with my newer primary photo of me with my fiance, I STILL get the occasional suggestive email ...
Maybe some people send out a *broadcast email* to all women (and/or men) of a certain age range or location.
again
I dunno.
Just delete & move on.
And ... posting in different forum topics here ... and reading what others posr ... can help you get to know people & help them get to know you.
There's nice guys out there ... Really ....
Best of luck in your search.
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| Oct 5, 2008 @ 11:26 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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mysticlisa
Posts: 1
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At least you are getting emails from local people. I've only been contacted by one person from my area in the two years that I have been here.
All other emails that I get are only scammers from Nigeria.
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| Oct 8, 2008 @ 10:12 AM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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cookiethief
Posts: 19
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I've been on this site for 3-4 years now, maybe longer, but I have yet to receive an honest to goodness reply from a fella who would like to get to know me, and go from there.
I get extreme replies, where the person states , "you are all they desire" blah, blah, blah, and they live 1,000 miles away.
Maybe people are really afraid of a real relationship: it's too complicated, or somethng??? 
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| Oct 24, 2008 @ 9:46 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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eveningstar1981
Posts: 4
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I so agree with you, I've had the same probs. I thought I had found one of the few who didn't ask for sex right away but he just turned out to be just like the rest of the guys who've IMed me or replied to my ad. I just want to find somone who wants to get to know me first before hoppin' into bed, is that so much to ask for? I guess it is,lol.
If there are any real men out there who aren't looking for that size zero woman,lol feel free to drop me aline. Yeah I'm a big beautiful woman and i deserve to find a decent guy too.
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| Oct 25, 2008 @ 5:40 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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kjac
Posts: 8,163
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Trust me ladies, it's no easier on this side of the fence.
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| Nov 8, 2008 @ 9:32 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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lindy_3333
Posts: 15
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Welcome to the internet.. don't worry... It wont be long before you run through all the guys wanting sex.. and then there will be only a few left to weed through.. and if you are really lucky one might be worth the while.. lol.. Gotta love online dating anymore.. it pretty much has gone to the dogs.. but hey, there is always hope that sometime someone just might be worth it.. but it will be like finding a needle in the haystack.. I keep hoping.. but I don't really expect much, but I am still an optimist  lol
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| Nov 9, 2008 @ 1:58 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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ace4169
Posts: 7
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Well as for me? I always had more luck out of my state meeting people, not to say it is true or false, but I met my ex wife that way. People put an emphasis on thinking they are gonna meet "Mr" or "Miss" right in the same state, but that sometimes don't work! Sometimes you have to look around surrounding states North south, east and west and then? Ask yourself if your willing to sacrifice the drive to go see them once a weekend, and then hope that they want to come be with you or you with them if the relationship "TIGHTENS". But that is if you don't have that much patience, if you have patience? I guess you wait and meet someone from your state. But the answer i can come up with is where,when, and how make up the factor. Just try new tactic's and don't give up! Good luck! Ace.
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| Nov 10, 2008 @ 7:55 AM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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Redshirt
Posts: 1
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I have been on this site off and on for a while. I have found that most every lady complains that they have been approached by numerous men seeking sex.
I have met ladies that complain quite a bit about that as we sit down. to dinner.
I wonder if they are bragging or just desperate.
If I sat down and all of a sudden and started to launch into a tirade about all the women who just want my body I would expect to be handed a microphone and continue my comedy routine..on stage.
I have been tempted to sugest sex to ladies on certain occasions. Haven't -because they might accept and then there would be the immediate concern about how clean they are,
Those occasions are: When I meet a bragger sugesting they are Gods gift to men
When I meet a woman who states that they are looking for everything but have or are willing to give nothing.
When I meet a lady who says she has met lots of men and been to a lot of nice restaurants but hasn't met the right one. That one might belong to the notorious Free dinner group,
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| Nov 11, 2008 @ 11:41 AM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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prettywoman0708
Posts: 1
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I'll tell you what is going on. There is a very small pool of men ( and I don't use that word lightly) left. Especially Christian men who want a RELATIONSHIP, not just a piece of ass. MEN are MATURE, confident, established, grounded, settled, finacially responsible and want a WIFE. They are not AFRAID of commitment which means a long term relationship leading to Marriage! There are too many woman out there who will have sex with a guy and most of them aren't men, they are immmature little boys who have functioning hardware and raging hormones. (you get the idea). They don't want a relationship, they want sex with lots of different woman and they can get it because woman will give it to them. (Not me!) So, we woman who are really good catches are having a hard time finding really good catches because most of them are taken. All we are left with is a small, dwindling pool of good catch resourses (most of whom are in a relationship or married). It's sad, but it's true!
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| Nov 17, 2008 @ 10:16 AM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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RobDaYz
Posts: 1
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Perhaps men are just being more rational? I'm not looking for just sex however i might not pass up the idea depending on whom i'm associating with. Today, women are seen as more "independent" and if they don't "need" a man around, then what motivation does a man have to stay around? We figure you'll just leave us for the next dick that comes along anyway so might as well enjoy our time with you in the most ways we can. I believe if you're in a relationship with someone, you're allowed to have sex. If you're just going to sit back and look pretty without contributing anything to the relationship, don't expect to be treated with respect. It's a mutual beneficial partnership. Lastly, even if a guy is hinting he wants to have sex with you, DON'T ASSUME thats the only thing he wants. I've had sex on first dates and guess what: i've kept seeing them without using them.
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| Nov 17, 2008 @ 10:54 AM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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Thunderstorms46
Posts: 16
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Thanks for the post Rob, You said a mouth full. I guess some guys are just as insecure as woman when it comes to the first date.
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| Nov 20, 2008 @ 12:46 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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poppi
Posts: 6
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yea i haven't found mr. right yet and honestly i don't think there is one for me i know im still young but i can say i do know what you mean this is my second time around on this site the first time the only men that responeded was only after my lil cuz that was in the pic with me (it was the only pic i had at the time) who was only 16 at the time so i just gave up know i have pics of just me and i dont get much mail.
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| Nov 26, 2008 @ 5:42 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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HeavenllySin
Posts: 9
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I honestly just don't understand the way relationships are supposed to work anymore... So a lot of guys want sex right up front, it's fun and all... but how do u get to know the person when u r busy hooking up and falling in love (hence sex makes people feel closer, without getting closer), so depending on how the person approaches me and my opinion of them I tell them up front.
"If you want a RELATIONSHIP[I], I am holding off having sex with you... I want to do it right and fall for you, for you. If all you want is sex... play your cards right and I am yours, but I am not dating you if I am having sex with you."
(Funny thing is, they always want the relationship but don wanna wait for sex, so they disappear.)
This is why nice guys don't get laid as much... your too good to use and throw away. I am independent enough to do my thing but I'm not a hoe either.
I may be demanding and a lil on the left side, but I am one in a million and I want someone who is going to be honest and knows what they want... I know where I draw the line and I know what makes me happy - someone who is capable of being in a real relationship should know the same things about themselves.
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| Nov 27, 2008 @ 9:51 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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kjac
Posts: 8,163
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Thanks Sin. I always thought I wasn't getting laid because I was an asshole. now I see that it's because I'm too nice. 
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| Nov 30, 2008 @ 7:12 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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wysn
Posts: 5
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hey Rob, I know what you are saying and I agree with some of it. I have had sex already on the first night with guys and we continued a relationship. A couple of them lasted over two years. Sometimes it can surprise you. It's not always about the guy anyways. At least not in my case it wasn't. But that's been years ago.Besides, sometimes, you want to know how the other person "is" before pursuing a relationship. LOL.
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| Dec 1, 2008 @ 12:13 PM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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EagleEric
Posts: 16
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I don't generally take the time to answer a post, but I will in your case.
What's wrong with your profile? Well it very dreary, sad, and too emotional. You don't sound a bit comfortable in your own skin, and you sound like a woman who is looking for a man to take care of her. Unfortunately, you also make yourself a target for the type of man who'll play you or take advantage of you emotionally.
I don't think most OK men want to be involved in a soap opera which is how you sound. I suggest you get yourself to where you are happy with yourself and then start looking. Finally study the profiles of upbeat people. Try to write something that doesn't require a crying towel.
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| Dec 1, 2008 @ 12:20 PM |
What the Hell is really going on?
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EagleEric
Posts: 16
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Heavenly Sin,
You worry entirely too much about what others are doing and thinking. Set your own standards rather than adopting the status quo or consensus. Then live by them.
Way too much emphasis is placed on sex both in words and actions. You can certainly tell an interested party that you have to develop a relationship to a certain point for intimacy.
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| Dec 2, 2008 @ 3:34 AM |
What the Hell is really going on? |
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HeavenllySin
Posts: 9
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To a point.... I have adopted this attitude because all the guys I have encountered within the last year are kinda.... well, if we start having sex early in the relationship - that is all we do... for months, we don't go out... I'm lucky to make it through their door before my cloths are off and their dragging me to the bedroom.
What happened to going on a date? Cuddling on the couch and watching a movie? Going for walks or sitting under the stars and talking?
Great example... this cute, weird guy (I thought he was gay) who works at the gas station I visit everyday came onto me, he blushed and giggled and finally made his move by asking my opinion of his.... *ahem*. He was so adorable... well, not that part but u know what I mean. I gave him my number and we txted for a few days, I asked him when he wanted to meet up and he was interested in getting it on as soon as I could find the time... but when I wasn't interested in pillow talk or any of that he became offended and told me he wanted more than just sex... I told him that when I looked at someone as relationship worthy I didn't have sex right away... it is hard for me to develop feelings for someone who is more like a boy toy right from the beginning. He wouldn't have any of it, and couldn't be my friend anymore.
Personally I don't like sex, I do it to please my partner... well, because I love pleasing my partner; cooking... being the happy little home maker and spoiling my partner makes me happy. Otherwise... sex is an ego trip for me... letting the the guys who aren't relationship material... but r fun... entertain and chase me a bit. It isn't mind games and it is fun for the both of us... with no worries.
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