| May 18, 2006 @ 9:41 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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minky

Posts: 239
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It doesn't get any better than this, the only emotional investment worth
making IMO.
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| May 18, 2006 @ 10:47 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Jankia

Posts: 9,056
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So true Minky,its a shame the unconditional love that you have for your children is so hard to find to have for each other.
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| May 19, 2006 @ 5:33 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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chinabull2000

Posts: 7,012
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I honestly believe that the unconditional love most of us have for us kids is impossible to give elsewhere... I would forgive my daughter anything, or at least nothing she could ever do would stop me loving her, no matter how bad, but my love for a spouse or partner could never be this unshakeable.
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| May 19, 2006 @ 7:54 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Goodness_Gracie

Posts: 708
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That is another form of unconditonal love. Loving a child or children verses your best friend your lover your partner in life is some what the same but on different levels. But yes I love my kids unconditional all 4 of them and my Grandson who is the Apple of this Grandmom's eyes!
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| May 19, 2006 @ 9:55 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Jankia

Posts: 9,056
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I dont think it impossible China.I know a man whose exact age I dont know but he is probaly pushing 75.Forty years ago when I was 10 his wife passed away.That man has always been courted,Ive heard from those who tried,he is well off financially,well groomed and handsome and has a fine home.He sits alone in church,he was a softball umpire forever and volunteers his help all of the time.A good citisen he is and still places a memorial flower for his now deceased wife on the alter every Christmas.
I dont know for sure but I think he hasnt even dated another women.
That kind of unconditional love to me is the same as you and I have for our children.
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| May 20, 2006 @ 2:10 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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chinabull2000

Posts: 7,012
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I'm sure you're probably right Jankia, it is possible, but just not possible for me.
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| May 20, 2006 @ 8:01 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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LSU79

Posts: 323
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But at what point does unconditional love become enabling, and the parent becomes a doormat? I've seen parents ruin their marriages, their finances, etc. by constantly bailing their worthless kids out of trouble, all in the name of "love".
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| May 20, 2006 @ 8:21 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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chinabull2000

Posts: 7,012
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But at what point does unconditional love become enabling, and the parent becomes a doormat? This is a completely different issue LSD. I have unconditional love for my daughter, but I am very tough on her, she knows what type of behaviour I expect from ehr and what I will not tolerate, but this does not diminsh my love for her. I play a consequences "game" with her all the time, and she knows that good OR bad behaviour carries consequences.
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| May 20, 2006 @ 10:43 AM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Loreli

Posts: 20,152
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I always told my boys I would love them with all my heart and be there for them no matter what. But...if they didn't learn from a mistake or two, they could pay the consequences themselves-still with my love, but not with my sheltering. They had a few bad teen years...it was not I that enabled them, but their Grandma-arrrrghhh, did that make me mad. To this day she still doesn't understand why you don't just hand kids cash or pay their fine, etc.
I tell my children I love them every single day. And even tho I know they love me, they sure tick me off a lot! Part of growing up...
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| May 20, 2006 @ 2:42 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Jankia

Posts: 9,056
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I tell my children I love them every single day
Thats the key right there Lori because its such a fine feeling when you know it isnt just words thrown out in habit.My son does something I never did with my dad.Sure I loved my pa but I never told him I loved him with three of my friends around at the same time.Wyatt does that and I know its really meant when he isnt embarrassed to say it with others around.Thats unconditional.
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| May 20, 2006 @ 2:57 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Jackie1954

Posts: 37
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Your kids are also the best friends you will ever have! Mine are supposedly all grown (25, 21 & 19) and there isn't one second in their lives that I wouldn't live all over again. Even the headaches and constant worrying. You can NEVER invest TOO MUCH in your kids.
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| May 20, 2006 @ 3:57 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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walkingman

Posts: 639
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I think that with kid's it is a given. The type of love we give them is un conditional but not impossible to find in a girlfriend or wife. I see it is someone who will stand by me through everything. It is being there for the other all the time. It is accepting a person for who they are never trying to change. them We just love them for who they are. I love my kid's more than life itself. It is much more difficult to find that with a girl friend or wife but is possible. The love we have for our kid's is there from the moment of conception till the day they are born, and through out there live's. In seeking a mate this is something that has to evolve over time. It just is not there from the start of life like it is with our children. It can be uncondtional love with a mate but it doe's take time to have it the love grow to that point. I do think being in love is a great feeling and one I hope to experience again.
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| May 29, 2006 @ 12:36 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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painter007

Posts: 15,881
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with unconditional love.............. comes forgiveness
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| Jul 7, 2006 @ 12:55 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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becca65

Posts: 11
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I agree with LSU79
and I dont think most people would be able to
love children if the children turned on them.
There are many murders of children who have been spoiled
and now feel entitled to take whatever
they feel like from their parents.
Would you love your child no matter what?
how about if they shot your parents/ siblings or new spouse and then came after you, but
somehow you were saved maybe by police intervention.
Do you feel that would change things?
( do a search "boy shoots father" and you will get millions of hits)
or would you enable any behavior because they were your precious babies?
and consider them misunderstood by the world at large?
( I have seen it and you have too)
where is the line ?
between healthy and unhealthy love?
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| Jul 7, 2006 @ 1:56 PM |
Kids and unconditional love |
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Cidronlvnv

Posts: 285
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Yeah, Kids have unconditional love and so much more.. Thats the reason I am pursuing (and have been) a career as an elemtary teacher. Ever since I first was a parent assistant in my kids kindergarden class. (ok, stepkid, but they are mine and I am pursuing adopting them with my semi-ex- blessing) They are so uncomplicated and unconditional. I made sure that I did the same thing for the remaining kids and I volunteer whenever I can. I would teach in an elementary school for free if I could afford it. Anyways, the other thing is that my soon to be ex and I also had unconditional love and still do.. Yeah, right.. why are we getting a divorce and all that then, right? Sex appetite difference, age difference and the customs/culture/principles/ that comes with that. We are great together, but the simple fact is that the way I am programmed by my upbringing and hers are incompatible in the bedroom. Imagine a puritanical pilgrim at woodstock. (her parents were 60's hippies, mine were 50's ultraconservatives)
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