| Dec 9, 2006 @ 9:38 PM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,790
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Finally a Barbie I can relate to. At long last, here are some NEW Barbie dolls to coincide OUR aging population. These are a bit more realistic... since I`m taking a break from blogging...thought I`d share this here...enjoy.. 
1. Bifocals Barbie."Comes with her own set of blended-lens and fashion frames in six wild colors (half-frames too!), neck chain, and large-print editions of Vogue and Martha Stewart Living"
2. Hot Flash Barbie."Press Barbie's bellybutton and watch her face turn beet red while tiny drops of perspiration appear on her forehead."(Comes with handheld fan and tiny tissues)
3. Facial Hair Barbie."As Barbie's hormone levels shift, see her grow whiskers."(Available with teensy tweezers and magnifying mirror)
4. Flabby Arms Barbie."Hide Barbie's droopy triceps with these new,roomier-sleeved gowns."(Good news on the tummy front, two-MuMus with tummy-support panels are included)
5. Bunion Barbie."Years of disco dancing in stiletto heels have definitely taken their toll on Barbie's dainty arched feet. Soothe her sores with the pumice stone and plasters, then slip on soft terry mules"
6. No-More-Wrinkles Barbie."Erase those pesky crow's-feet and lip lines with a tube of Skin Sparkle-Spackle, from Barbie's own line of exclusive age-blasting cosmetics."
7. Soccer Mom Barbie."All that experience as a cheerleader is really paying off as Barbie dusts off her old high school megaphone to root for Babs and Ken, Jr."(Comes with minivan in robin-egg blue or white and cooler filled with doughnut holes and fruit punch.)
8. Mid-life Crisis Barbie."It's time to ditch Ken. Barbie needs a change, and Alonzo(her personal trainer)is just what the doctor ordered, along with Prozac.They're hopping in her new red Miata and heading for the Napa Valley to open a B&B.(Includes a real tape of "Breaking Up Is Hard to Do.")
9. Divorced Barbie."Sells for $199.99. Comes with Ken's house,Ken's car,and Ken's boat."
10. Recovery Barbie."Too many parties have finally caught up with the ultimate party girl.Now she does Twelve Steps instead of dance steps.Clean and sober, she's going to meetings religiously."(Comes with a little copy of The Big Book and a six-pack of Diet Coke.)
11. Post-Menopausal Barbie. "This Barbie wets her pants when she sneezes, forgets where she puts things, and cries a lot.She is sick and tired of Ken sitting on the couch watching the tube, clicking through the channels." (Comes with Depends and Kleenex. As a bonus this year, the book "Getting In Touch with Your Inner Self" is included.)
Anyone want a New Barbie?
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| Dec 9, 2006 @ 9:41 PM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,074
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I want a Bipolar-Off-Her-Meds Barbie
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| Dec 9, 2006 @ 9:43 PM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,790
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Thats a good one..too bad shes not on the list.. 
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| Dec 9, 2006 @ 10:20 PM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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ash_is_unforgetable
Posts: 837
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 What a silly list!
*AsH
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 1:41 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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hiriya
Posts: 1,378
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Where's the divorced barbie... I need to buy one
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 2:56 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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TRS1958
Posts: 481
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Edited because it was already on the list..
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 3:29 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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countryboy69995
Posts: 653
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Nympho barbie? Look out Ken here she comes.
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 6:19 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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twotall911
Posts: 12,828
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smart-romantic barbie
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 6:49 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,790
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That barbie on your Christmas Wish List... 
Post-Menopausal Barbie.<----theres one for ya..
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 9:48 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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definitelydi
Posts: 12,602
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Where's Fat Ass Barbie? Ya, there is a Flabby Arm Barbie but that's not enough! I wanna see some fat rolls on her back, dammit!
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 10:05 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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razzired
Posts: 2,922
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The funniest actual Barbie-type doll I ever saw was the pregnant doll. You took the lid off the tummy, removed the baby, flipped the lid over and replaced it -- presto!! From pregnant to flat, no stretch marks tummy in 10 seconds!
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 10:34 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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Thor1960303
Posts: 1,846
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There was a Bride of Satan Barbie on ebay a few years ago.It was someone's creation and not from Mattell.Came complete with black bridal gown,pentagram and picture of Anton LaVey.
I would like to see trailer trash Barbie,crack ho barbie and prison Barbie.
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 10:45 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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Blondino
Posts: 4,256
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Mutton Dressed as Lamb Barbie ???
middle aged Barbie wearing tight short skirt and low necked top .... and killer heels .. looking like a hooker 
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:12 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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Blondino
Posts: 4,256
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Middle Aged Spread Barbie
complete with elastic waisted stretch pants 
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:31 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,790
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:37 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 10,074
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Heroin Chic Barbie!!!
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:51 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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Luckygem
Posts: 2,933
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Where's Fat Ass Barbie?
Now I can relate to her and so many of these: Bifocals Barbie,Hot Flash Barbie,Divorced Barbie why dont they have a Menopausal Barbie to go with the Post Menopausal.........
Look out Ken here she comes he is so GAY...he wants Alan anyway
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:54 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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julia143
Posts: 1,696
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I used to own Well-fare Barbie....she had old home-made knitted rags for clothes, no car, no house...but a bunch of kids and no Ken.....
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:55 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,790
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Really..never heard of that one Julia.. 
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| Dec 10, 2006 @ 11:57 AM |
Cheers to the new Barbie |
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Luckygem
Posts: 2,933
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 Thats a good one Julia......
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