| Apr 12, 2008 @ 2:17 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Loyalover
Posts: 16
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Would it be FAIR play that when someone writes you,(considering they are being nice
or decent) to WRITE (at least) SOMETHING BACK in response?
(Even if it is a simple "No Thanks")
I see a LOT of females here,when wrote to ignore my kind and thoughtful letters.
What causes this?  
I ALWAYS reply to writers,even if I suspect it as spam! (later you can block/report)
I just feel so tired of trying... 
Thanks & best of luck to ALL serious-minded NON scamming/Non-players.
Have a good 1! 
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| Apr 12, 2008 @ 2:48 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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beckyiv42000
Posts: 14,576
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Yes it would be fair and considerate .. but there are mitigating factors here.. some people get SOOOO much email and that even the slightest hint of spam/scam they delete or ignore the email.. are you including an outside email address in your first email to them?? that is a big red flag for instant deletion ... and then there are others who are NOT here for anything but friendship and any emails going beyond that scope are ignored ..especially when the party receiving the email has stated in their profile that they are only here fro freinds not searching for a mate.. so many things can be the reason for the lack of response ...its a crap shoot at best so just keep trying and dont give up hope I have seen so many wonderful matches made here just because they did not stop trying  good luck
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| Apr 12, 2008 @ 2:52 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Loreli
Posts: 25,417
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It often depends on the length/content of the letter.
A short, nice letter may get more response than an essay of one's life!
(I don't know what YOU send, but that's jmho)
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| Apr 12, 2008 @ 6:28 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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Danger
Posts: 1,246
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if the email is decent and nice...definately the other should write back. they have taken time to look at that persons profile and to acknowledge them-which isn't always easy...and then to get find out they never answer. makes me think they THINK they are better then you...
take your time and you will find the right person. shoot...look at me, been 'looking' for over 10 years so i have had a LOT of the 'replies' you mentioned...
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| Apr 12, 2008 @ 6:30 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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BandTMom
Posts: 38,063
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And then you have those decent letters that turn nasty when answered with a rejection. 
There are many reasons that people don't respond to emails. Don't take it personally.
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 1:01 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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grumblebear
Posts: 10,559
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I don't get replies... there are a couple of folks on the forums who will write back, but the majority of folks don't bother...
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 1:32 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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SunBabe
Posts: 12,279
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I usually write you back, Grumble  You didn't have to cancel 
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 12:00 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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kattsmeow
Posts: 22,629
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I don't answer the ones that I know didn't read my profile.
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 2:47 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Luckygem
Posts: 3,531
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I get so much spam email and long emails, I try to be nice and answer back but sometimes after so many of the same type I dont even bother I just delete them. If they give the phone number, private email address I dont usually answer those either because of the emails I get back if I say thanks but I am not inteterested. People can be very cruel when rejected.
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 3:23 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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JenRNinOhio
Posts: 4,161
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I can only agree with these three quotes:
KattsMeow said:
I don't answer the ones that I know didn't read my profile.
&
B&TMom said:
And then you have those decent letters that turn nasty when answered with a rejection
&
Becky said:
and then there are others who are NOT here for anything but friendship and any emails going beyond that scope are ignored ..especially when the party receiving the email has stated in their profile that they are only here fro freinds not searching for a mate..
LoyalLover, I am not implying that you just send emails without reading the profile. I am quoting the previous posts hoping to enlighten some others ...
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 3:39 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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parrothead1234
Posts: 712
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My advice - keep it short and sweet - & don't put so much effort & hope into an initial email.
As the ladies said, life stories right off the bat are a little much.
Don't forget, the opposite can be a problem as well. Say you send off a long, heart felt email right off the bat - & she replies in kind. It might be the case you've made a great friend, or even something more substantial - to the positive.
On the flipside, you may have touched base with someone who's likely to nail a dead chicken to your door if you piss them off - and you could've saw it coming if weren't so blinded by their warm response you received.
Dude - exhale.
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| Apr 13, 2008 @ 3:43 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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loisday
Posts: 1,333
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On the flipside, you may have touched base with someone who's likely to nail a dead chicken to your door if you piss them off - and you could've saw it coming if weren't so blinded by their warm response you received.
Exactly............ 
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| Apr 28, 2008 @ 11:30 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Makya
Posts: 1,131
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I always respond initially. What I don't like is being asked for my personal email right off the bat. 
I also don't like the fact that when I tell someone I keep my chat to the site, they retort with all sorts of ridiculous reasons why I should email them instead.
I don't answer the ones that I know didn't read my profile
I answer them and tell them that information can be found in my profile. In one instance though, the person got nasty about the fact that I expected him to read my profile.
WTH was that about? Isn't that what the profile is there for?
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| Apr 28, 2008 @ 11:34 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,620
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For me, it will depend on the email...I got one from the OP that was just as he described, nice and decent and friendly. I sensed a good guy and responded in kind...no big deal.
Scammers are too easy to spot at this point - report as spam, delete. No need to respond.
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| Apr 28, 2008 @ 11:40 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Makya
Posts: 1,131
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Are spammers pretty much the ones that insist on having your personal email address?
You know I'm still learning. 
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| Apr 28, 2008 @ 12:31 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,417
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the ones that insist on having your personal email address there's tons of them!
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| Apr 28, 2008 @ 3:47 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,620
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Here's a typical scam mail Makya - the 'hello pretty' is one tipoff, as are the phrases in bold.
Hello Pretty
I like what I read in your profile,I wouldn't mind to talk to you if you are sincere and honest.My Name is Micheal XXXXXX ,am 50 years old.. I am single have two lovely daugthers, I love meeting people and going for walks on the beach, especially when the sun is setting or rising. I have a great sense of humour, I love to laugh and have fun. I enjoy going to the movies, dancing,i love music and Poem and going to pubs sometimes,I'm respectible and responsible.I will be glad to meet u also if u love kids and love God. my reasons of being on this dating site is to share my gestures of passionate heart with a woman that cares to be loved,if u care let us talk more,My email address is ... (email addy deleted) Stay blessed and talk to you soon.
And my profile indicates that I'm not religious and I AM in a relationship... 
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| Apr 29, 2008 @ 7:48 AM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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Loyalover
Posts: 16
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Wow...you folks sure are informative and CORRECT! I might add!! I know you're right
about taking it slowly and I try to never blabber to much and Yes,I've a gull-able heart
and always keep my mind open to the needs and privacy and try to "walk a mile in the other persons shoes" before I reply or stick my neck out too far and albeit my sanity is what I make of it and when I sense another person prying or pushing for a lot of personal information,I usually relinquish little and then start asking but that may be too late and yet if I ask to quickly somethings it gets ignored or worse I am shunted or lied to or "put in my place,per se'. (Which I can and do accept) but I never have been a real stickler for excessive info,etc.
I am easy going and merely seek what my profile reads...yeah,agreed. READ THE PROFILE FIRST IS my motto. Damn the torpedoes to those whom have written me nicely and included an email address and were nice and seemed like a genuinely interested in mutually beneficial relationship sort of member and then asked me all the questions ALREADY ANSWERED on/in my Profile-listed! Aaaaargh...
H E L L Oooo! Reading is for adults? uh yah... 
Well folks,I've been listing my profile for many years now and the best I can say I was able to look back on was friends. NOTHING wrong with that! - It's just that someone once said;"You get what you pay for in life" ---So am I to assume that this refers to market items only or web sites also? (Dating) MATCHdoctor infers (to me) that it is a DATING site. (allowing friendships and multi-purpose camaraderie)
But! If I am incorrect then I am willing to stand corrected,I'm a big boy I can take it!!
Oh and T.Y.S.M for "standing up" for me,Heaveninawildflower. You're truly what I consider a friend both in deed and in spirit. I am watching this thread/post now,I honestly did not think I'd merit any responses worth a darned.
No,I don't throw anything unnecessary or excessive at prospective friends or
dates...I am leery of immediate email addresses included in (especially) a new or first email. I just received a spam email and ignored it and an hour later MD removed the spammer from the site! I'm no dummy but I AM human and prone to vulnerability like anyone else. I just don't see where describing myself lightly and being complimentary while being inviting and simply kind and extending my open and warm non-intrusive sincere self could be contrived as being a spammer or scam artist. Well,artist maybe but NOT scam or spam...just goes to show how things can be so easily misconstrued in these times,today. I usually don't kiss a lady's hand unless I know her,but many expect me to kiss something else (not so nice an explanation of emotion) 
In any case...the reason I posted herein is obvious...it's just not usually deemed
considerable by many,unfortunately.
But I wont be too hasty here and will allow for error irregardless.
Bless you all for your time and efforts and comments and best of wishes / regards to you all from this "veteran of old fashioned standards" and u.s. (militia) Veteran as well as dating site's Veteran and old time pen pal fan/writer known in variant part's of the globe.
Thanks again! 
P.s.-A tip of the top hat to all you dedicated thinker's and bloggers! ~Peace!!~
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| Apr 29, 2008 @ 1:23 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers...
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theblessedone
Posts: 172
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Whenever I've been on dating sites with a profile that indicated I was "on the prowl," I would respond to every e-mail that did not include spam, scams, or perversion/unwarranted suggestiveness (unless I had already sent a "thanks, but no thanks" and received a follow-up...then it would depend on the content of the same).
However, I've spent a lot of my dating site time with a "not looking" profile (this time, because I'm engaged...historically, because I simply wasn't interested in meeting anyone). In those cases, I only replied if the writer offered something pertinent to respond to (i.e. - comment on my profile/photo, location, or something of the sort).
But hey...that's just my M.O.!
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| Apr 30, 2008 @ 4:01 PM |
Responding to inquiries/emails/writers... |
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Rosie6512
Posts: 467
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I have the same problem...send a nice email and no response...not even a no thank you. It makes me want to completely give up, oh wait - I have! LOL
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