| Dec 30, 2005 @ 9:02 PM |
Poor Boxes
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raykl
Posts: 566
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Now I may not be the brightest bulb on the chandelier, but I
cannot figure out why they lock these boxes. After a nice person places his/her money into it, for the purpose of
helping the poor, the poor cannot get to it.
The poor person, out of frustration, now must break into the
box, thus creating a crime. By locking the boxes, we thus
create crime.
It just seems to me it would be better to leave the box unlocked so the poor can easily get to the money.
Makes as much sense as locking a church so people cannot
go in to pray.........
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| Dec 30, 2005 @ 9:05 PM |
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spongebob777
Posts: 7,904
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That's a little too close to my way of thinking and that should scare both of us. 
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| Dec 30, 2005 @ 9:18 PM |
Poor Boxes
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Classy_Blonde
Posts: 6,034
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The name on this thread was very misleading. I was going to report it to MD and have them move it to the 'Sex Talk' forum.
I want some of what Raykl's taking.  
I hope you mean the locked threads. Remember--I'm a blonde. 
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| Dec 30, 2005 @ 11:07 PM |
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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It is about time that this topic was broached since it is all tied to our method of communicating.
You must remember, Martin Luther made the first "Post" and it was hung by a "Thread" on the church door. (I am intentionally excluding dates and locations for two reasons: 1. To encourage you to study church history; and, 2. to remain religiously correct and not offend any "Tom" that might [<--- "operative word] want to peek [or any Harry or Dick, either - to be all-inclusive])
Now, as I am sure a person with a desire to prey and pray must know, the Luther "Post" was the "Thread" that started the Reformation.
Okay, calm down, I am getting to the poor box issue and you will see it is all related.
Now, originally, poor boxes were known as mite boxes. That caused a number of problems.
On their way into church, people were picking mites from one another and depositing them into the boxes so that they would not infest the church. The selections expanded to include nits and lice and the church was forced to make the boxes much larger. As the mites escaped from the boxes, the churches began to have problems so they "Posted" signs that said "NO LICE" or "Licius Non" in Latin.
One very devout woman told her friend that she was going to use that notice as a chance to get rid of her husband. She told him he could no longer attend church because he was a louse. (You can see how this has now led to "Male Bashing.)
Anyway, there were now two large religious group fighting for the devotion of the faithful. One group (History is unclear as to which) decided to call them "Mighty Boxes" but - again - the women protested and claimed there should also be a "Minnie Box."
(The battle lines are beginning to take shape now.) Women formed a group called "The Inter-networking Oorpay Unit" or I.O.U. as a method of protecting their boxes. Now, I am sure you are starting to see the development of both sexual withholding and our modern technology. "Oorpay" is Pig Latin for poor. And, of course, the human tendency to shorten everything caused Inter-networking to be referred to an Internet. Mind you, this was long before Al Gore.
Another women's group did not like the use of the word Unit" and insisted it be changed.
Now the churches were faced with two dilemmas: 1. How many boxes or units they should mount; and, 2. What they should call them. Since Latin was still the "language" of both movements, some scholar suggested they continue with the Pig Latin format and call them Oorpay Oxbays. And, since a box is a form of enclosure, they decided to trick the women and refer to them as Oorpay E-bays. Ah ha! Another modern term is born!
Things were progressing nicely in spite of the differences between the two movements and they decided to have an ecumenical meeting. Naturally, maintaining a religiously correct philosophy, they invited representatives of the people of Israel.
One morning, on his way to a meeting, one of the rabbis was late and was having his breakfast while he walked to the church. Not finished when he arrived, he did not want to enter with his breakfast in his hand so he left his bagel on the oorpay oxbay and figured he could get it on the way out.
When the meeting adjourned, the poor rabbi fainted when he reached for his bagel. It was covered with mites - but - they were all dead. Immediately, the partially-eaten bagel was taken to the lab and the top scientists from all faiths studied it. They determined it was the lox on the bagel that killed the mites.
From that day forth, all oorpay oxbays had a little place to hang lox as a repellent of mites.
This created another problem. Since most poor people (and it was the poor who were expected to contribute TO the oorpay oxbays) were almost always hungry, the lox was often eaten by the first supplicant to attend service.
It was then they decided to put the lox "inside" and to lock the lox in the box.
Since churches are usually a bit dark, it was still easy to break into the boxes to steal the lox so they decided to lock the church too.
I hope this will encourage you to study a little more religious history during your incarceration for B&E.
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 12:48 AM |
Poor Boxes
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raykl
Posts: 566
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I enjoyed that...
"Women formed a group called "The Inter-networking Oorpay Unit" or I.O.U. as a method of protecting their boxes."
I think I dated alot of these women!!!!!!!
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 12:52 AM |
Poor Boxes |
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ExacerbatedTaboo
Posts: 1,401
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Poor Boxes
Have sympathy for boxes much?
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 1:05 AM |
Poor Boxes
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MelMel
Posts: 183
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 Hey Tab...
In Alabama.. we have/had what is called a "Christmas Charity".. anyone who wanted to donate old clothes, toys, etc., could leave them at the docking bay and the "workers" would pick them up and carry them in.. well.. everytime I drove by.. there would be boxes and boxes of things still left outside... and it was evident that they have been "picked" through...
At least they would didn't have to go thru dumpsters to find a coat... *they did move the location of the Christmas Charity recently*...
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 1:50 AM |
Poor Boxes |
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stgrizzvi
Posts: 148
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I enjoy the "research" that you do Mr. Perhapslove. I was laughing so hard I was almost crying....I thought for sure that you were on your way to incorporating Oprah Winfree there for a moment---
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 9:48 AM |
Poor Boxes
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lecriveuse
Posts: 1,865
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to lock the lox in the box
y do i feel the spirit of dr seuss n here? perhaps, ur a mess!  u know ur gonna have to change ur ways when u have a honey. she'll never sit up straight if u kept this stuff up. what if she were trying to have a cup of coffee? 
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 10:06 AM |
Poor Boxes |
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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There will ALWAYS be "Time Out" for coffee...
And, if she is so endowed, we can design a little "holder" that might fit comfortably in the "excessive cleavage" and keep the coffee cup, or any beverage container, from spilling.
A photo of that might be called a "Mug Shot."
And, spillage would not be wasted since it might well be licked away.
(The goose - not seuss - is loose, friend lecriveuse)
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| Dec 31, 2005 @ 7:39 PM |
Poor Boxes
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lecriveuse
Posts: 1,865
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(The goose - not seuss - is loose, friend lecriveuse)
And, spillage would not be wasted since it might well be licked away. 
i'm speechless.  seriously, perhaps, ur wasting such a talent with ur writing. dont just restrict it 2 reference books.
[Edited on 12/31/2005 7:39 PM]
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| Jan 1, 2006 @ 1:34 AM |
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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[QUOTE]2 reference books.[QUOTE]
Actually, there is a group of seven books - four of which are a "sort of" series...
One is 99-44/100% completed and I am jerking around with a couple of dork agents.
What I really need to do is write a letter to Ben Bradlee. He would not have been my first choice but we did work together (if you can call what little I did work) during his Newsweek days.
Just in case it has slipped your mind, Ben was the Senior Editor at the Washington Post at the time of Watergate.
One of my closest friends was the Senior Editor at Newsweek but he has passed. We banged around playing minor league football for years and later coached against each other in two semi-pro leagues.
If he were alive, all the wheels would be greased for easy publication at the most rewarding level.
But, if bullfrogs had wings, they would not bump their asses.
Happy New Year.....
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| Jan 1, 2006 @ 1:43 AM |
Poor Boxes
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lecriveuse
Posts: 1,865
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Happy New Year.....
ditto. dont forget i want an autographed copy. it should go something like this: to my muse 
yes, i'm a leo n a ham.
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| Jan 1, 2006 @ 7:33 AM |
Poor Boxes |
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sciurusniger
Posts: 2,959
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It is about time that this topic was broached since it is all tied to our method of communicating.
I like flavored coffee, too, PL, but just what the hex did you use in yours anyway?!? LOLOL!
This was great!
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| Jan 1, 2006 @ 11:55 AM |
Poor Boxes
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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great
?????????????????????
What?
The broach?
Communicating?
Coffee?
The hex?
Since you inquired...
I put nothing in my coffee - save those things I am sure you detest -
Light Creme (sometimes Half 'n' Half since this IS Florida and I do not know how to ask for light creme in Spanish) and
REAL Sugar - sometimes a treat: Sugar in the Raw, which, is of course, slightly LESS processed but MORE expensive.
I developed my taste for sugar early.
No; NOT eating candy; but listening to the priests advertise during Mass: "Domino, Oh viscid."
Each week, it was the rotating responsibility among the cherubs for one to take a few cubes from his Mother's box of sugar and distribute them among the faithful.
Then, at the appropriate time, we would stealthily bow our heads and slip the cube in our mouths.
This was quite dangerous.
Sister Europeandasia was always on the watch for such activity, as was Father McFisticuffs.
Remember, we were still fasting until Communion and some of us, if we had played a game or two of stick-ball before Mass, were quite hungry.
One thin wafer was all we would receive until, on the way home, we ate some of the rolls we had to pick up at the bakery.
This, too, was dangerous.
"The woman must have miscounted" story only worked about once a year.
Now, I do not think I am "straying" here because the critters are part of the "congregation" and the feathered creatures part of the "flock" - especially since the Cardinal will be arriving soon.
A few raccoon members of the congregation periodically display what I can only define as "molting."
They seem to have a thinning hair-line (NO WISE CRACKS, Please) which starts near their necks and VERY SLOWLY works to the rear of their bodies.
With some, it is far more pronounced than with others. (Also, as an aside, are there long-hair and short-hair varieties - as with cats?)
I realize some members of northern congregations shed with the change of seasons but here there is very little difference.
Which brings to mind another matter - church-related, of course.
Not so at Christmas, but last evening I felt a terrible longing for New England (and the services at the Paulist Center in Boston - Ho, Ho, Ho!)
Thus, I did not even tune in to watch the Guy Lombardo re-runs because I did not want to see that northern phenomenon - SNOW.
Blessings of the New Year to ALL...
And, for those of you lucky enough to be Yankees,
if it gets a tad chilly,
remember the words of Saint Frigid,
Many are cold but few are frozen.
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| Jan 1, 2006 @ 11:56 PM |
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Angel54214
Posts: 14,056
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And, for those of you lucky enough to be Yankees
Thats me! but I all warm and snug as a bug. 
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| Jan 2, 2006 @ 4:50 PM |
Poor Boxes
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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Yankees...
Is it not amazing... no matter where people from the northeast are currently located, they are always a step or two or three or four or more ahead of the crowd.
This probably true for swamp-Yankees as well.
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| Jan 2, 2006 @ 6:07 PM |
Poor Boxes |
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Angel54214
Posts: 14,056
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I still don't understand this thread (?) and I am a proud blonde yankee transplant.
Poor Boxes=Cheap Chasity Belt? 
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| Jan 2, 2006 @ 8:41 PM |
Poor Boxes
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sciurusniger
Posts: 2,959
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A few raccoon members of the congregation periodically display what I can only define as "molting." They seem to have a thinning hair-line
Which is exactly that you're seeing. If they had mange, they would become decidedly bald in patches and the skin would look wrinkled and/or raw from the scratching.
In raccoon lore it is said to also be a sign of the annual shuffle as the young 'uns begin to disperse. Apparently many of the participants feel the need to draw the line....
are there long-hair and short-hair varieties - as with cats?
Yes, so to speak. 'Coons are very unique individuals, from their faces to their coats. There are subspecies of them around the country, and though no one has yet documented domspecies they are strongly suspected to exist.
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| Jan 2, 2006 @ 8:50 PM |
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PerhapsLove
Posts: 643
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Wonderful!
It is good to know they do not have mange (YUK)
The difference in their faces - especially the "masks" - is quite apparent.
What is funny is they they definitely have different "personalities."
Ahhh! I suspected the "variety" differences. Some of these younger guys (?) - especially the "triplets" have extremely brown stripes (rings?) on their tails. Most of the others are gray stripes. Those with the brown, also have a strong brown tinge just behind the backs of their necks.
Thanks for the GREAT input.
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