| Nov 25, 2008 @ 8:51 AM |
This could be fun!
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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OMG I got this email yesterday:
My name is Micheal Woods bereaved with a son. I need a new nanny urgently because my present nanny will be quitting in a few weeks time. British Family,actually my wife is dead, died a few months ago from cancer. Family speaks English fluently Looking for male or female and even couples are permitted to apply for the Nanny position. I need an aupair/nanny asap, and i mean as really soon as possible.
Expectations: For you i really want to make you feel welcome and comfortable as if you are in your own home while you are living with us.
We hope you will enjoy your time over here both with us and with learning English and making new friends. We live in *ADDRESS REMOVED*, LONDON,Greater London, W10 5LP UK. Desmond has his bedroom on the second floor of the house. Your
bedroom is on the first floor. Desmond goes to school from 8:45 to 15:30 every day.
About our family Desmond is quite energetic. He is very inquisitive and likes to learn about nature, He's so into Soccer,
He is quite sweet and sensitive. He is also very strong-willed and if he wants something he will present many reasons about why he feels he should be able to do it. Likewise,
If you want the job send in your resume. Then please be aware that any Would-Be Nanny will have to shoulder a certain percentage of her relocation costs, because i just wasted the last 6weeks trying to help shoulder all the cost only for the nanny never to show up at the appointed time and i've not read from her since so i'll not entertain any unnecessary delays.
Please know that i'll only listen to interested persons . Send in your
resumes when replying this mail.
Here is my E-mail address:
***********************
Regards
Micheal Woods
I couldn't help myself.
I went to The Rejection Hotline and got a random number and wrote this back to him:
It sounds like a dream come true! Please call me right away at 617-861-3962 so we can make arrangements.
Sincerely
Mary Poppins
Well, I figured that was the last of him, but I just got this:
Dear Mary,
Got your mail and i want to thank you for your response,
Please i'll want you to send me a copy of your resume/CV as soon as possible so i can have a look at it and get back to you with a work-contract.
Regards
Micheal.
So who wants to help me write a phony resume? All phone numbers should come from the Rejection Hotline webpage, and my last job MUST be listed as The Banks Family. Father's name, George. Mother's name, Winifred. Children are Jane and Michael. If you know the movie well, feel free to embellish about feeding the birds, the run on the bank, jumping in and out of chalk pavement pictures, tea parties on the ceiling, etc.
This might be fun!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:01 AM |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,401
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I'll think on it!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:09 AM |
This could be fun!
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mystery2u888
Posts: 18,025
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omg my little gf eternal..............classic! thank you.........for this 
  xoxo
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:41 AM |
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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I just found THIS online!
Still looking, tho. 
From the movie script:
Mary Poppins:
Oh, I make it a point never to give references. A very old-fashioned idea to my mind.
Mr. Banks:
Is that so? We'll have to see about that then, won't we?
Mary Poppins:
Now then, the qualifications. "Item one: a cheery disposition." I am never cross. "Item two: rosy cheeks." Obviously. "Item three: play games, all sorts." Well, I'm sure the children will find my games extremely diverting.
Mr. Banks:
May I? Eh, this paper? Where did you get it from? I thought I tore it up
Mary Poppins:
Excuse me. "Item four: you must be kind." I am kind, but extremely firm.
So there we have her qualifications....
[Edited on 11/25/2008 10:49 AM]
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:49 AM |
This could be fun!
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Merchitown
Posts: 6,130
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:51 AM |
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mystery2u888
Posts: 18,025
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u are too funny......
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:53 AM |
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Merchitown
Posts: 6,130
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(wipes tears)
I'm sorry, that was hilarious! Ok EF, I'll put my thinking cap on, but I am just not that creative!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 10:59 AM |
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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Oh gads! And everyone remember! She can only stay until the wind changes!
Wind from the east
Mist comin' in
Like something is brewin'
About to begin
Can't put me finger
On what lies in store
But I feel what's to happen
All happened before
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 11:10 AM |
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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Shoot! I forgot to add..
George and Winifred Banks live at 17 Cherry Tree Lane, London.
I'm scaring myself over how much of this movie I know by heart, but it always was one of my favourites! 
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 11:21 AM |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,401
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Mr. Banks: Just a moment, Mary Poppins. What is the meaning of this outrage?
Mary Poppins: I beg your pardon?
Mr. Banks: Will you be good enough to explain all this?
Mary Poppins: First of all I would like to make one thing quite clear.
Mr. Banks: Yes?
Mary Poppins: I never explain anything
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 11:29 AM |
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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Lor!
I just sent this to my prospective employer:
Dear Mr Woods
I am currently working on my resume and will have it together for you soon. Please do not fill the position until you have read my resume. I'm quite sure you will find me more than qualified.
Sincerely
Mary Poppins
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 11:52 AM |
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Fender
Posts: 8,499
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Work Experience
1901-1901: I worked at a Wild West Saloon/Brothel. It was very fulfilling work. When not servicing the clientele I was tutoring my fellow workers in English. I taught many of them how to read.
Reason for leaving: I was fired because I gave "The Pox" to many of the customers and they died.
1901-1942: I worked for the Royal Family. I was the one who was responsible for raising Queen Elizabeth and making sure she grew up into the wonderful grand dame she is now. I taught her how to sew, crochet and finger paint. When we were not working on our studies I took her on long walks and showed her how she could leave the Castle grounds at night to go dancing with all the boys who were home from the war. She was a wild one.
Reason for leaving: I was let go because Queen Elizabeth became impregnated by a soldier.
I could come up with more but this is on the spur of the moment and I'm hungry for lunch. I'm sure it could be more outlandish than that...By the way, he offered me a job too. He offered me all the satellite t.v. I could handle
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 11:55 AM |
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Winnie4010
Posts: 2,641
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Well hell.....I didn't get offered no stinking job 
Damn the luck!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 12:03 PM |
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EternalFlame
Posts: 4,136
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Fender!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 12:10 PM |
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ISSUESWOPTIONS
Posts: 8,070
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"Chim chimney, chim chimney, chim chim cher-ee. A sweep is as lucky, as lucky can be. Chim chimney, chim chimney, chim chim cher-oo......."
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 12:46 PM |
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poniepower
Posts: 1,733
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Don't forget to mention you carry an umbrella because of the unpredictable weather, er predictable I mean....for the children's sake....and your brella does magical things
Michael: We better keep an eye on this one. She's tricky. I think fits EF perfectly right now Er I mean Mary Poppins!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 2:18 PM |
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Merchitown
Posts: 6,130
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I think she's wonderful!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 4:22 PM |
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poniepower
Posts: 1,733
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It's a quote from Mary Poppins Mer...LOL
"Oh, supercallifragilisticexpialidocious, even though the sound of it is something quite atrocious."
Not sure on the spelling for supercallifraglisticexpialidoious... whew...quite the word to spell out on morphine.... or say even on morphine with the tongue ring in....haha!
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 4:47 PM |
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Jacksonboy
Posts: 7
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Dam dam dam!!! I never saw that movie and I want to help so bad.
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| Nov 25, 2008 @ 4:59 PM |
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Merchitown
Posts: 6,130
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So was mine, Ponie, it's the follow up line to Michael, Jane says it.
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