| Jan 31 @ 9:44 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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It has been suggested that this subject might just spark an interest for "discussion" and so.... it's been brought to the forums... have at it!!!
Today's blog....
Why I declare!
But I do believe I've just been called the equivalent of a “sexist pig.”
Not exactly, but "sexist pig" carries more weight for the subject line in my blog than “stinker.” (poetic license you know)
Written in response to my blog of 1-27 “Well Make My Day,” I received the following note:
seems like i'll have to go back and re read your blog.
maybe it was the ladies comments that added to the x
rated nature.....now if one of us guys had gone on
about a young lady "at our desk" in the same manner i
wonder if the comments would have been similar....
stinker He's right you know. And so.... I was very glad to advise him that I was already aware of this double standard we girls may develop at this stage in life. However, in our defense, I also believe, there is a tremendous difference in “noticing” a hunk sitting at our desk compared to trapsing around the office “on the prowl” for “sweet young things” as some (not all) men at this stage of life are often tempted to do.
Now... as proof that I am, in fact, a self-aware person... I repost my blog on this issue dated 8/11/2006
*************************
This blog is written with a light heart and sense of laughing at myself.
Should you choose to read it, please do so in the same manner.
We humans are such a funny lot.
Ever notice how God gives us lessons to teach us to understand others?
I know better than to criticize and judge others,
not simply because it “isn’t nice”. But…
because in time, God has a way of putting us in the other person’s
shoes (or moccasins if you will) so we can gain understanding.
Well, for years I’ve never understood men who “eat up” the flirtations
of much younger women.
And yes, I’ve even criticized such men.
I mean, men 60 getting all fluttery over some gal 30 (perhaps with 5 kids)
And thinking it really might be “love” or their good looks?
Come on now guys, get real! I don't care how good looking you are.
And right I am in this, justified, no doubt about it…
Men… this is ridiculous behavior!
Nor is this an issue of jealousy.
I’ve had my share of younger guys hitting on me.
At 35 there were 20 year olds.
At 40 there were 30 year olds.
And men, I wasn’t foiled that it was my good looks.
Nope… women just don’t get “sucked” in the way men do.
And so I continued to criticize this negative behavior in men.
Until the other day….
I work in a social service environment and help a multitude of people daily.
The other day a young man (I guessing at best late 30s) came in and I helped him just like I would any other person needing assistance. He was so appreciative that he gave me a big hug. Wasn't that sweet?
This young man began coming into our facility daily.
And since I was “the nice lady” to help him first, he didn’t want assistance from any of our other able bodied persons.
And of course I got my hugs and big dimpled smile.
Now, I have never been much of one to look for or pay attention to “beautiful bodies”. Bodies are bodies. (That’s not entirely true. A nice neck and biceps tend to get my attention.) But for the most part, I don’t set body standards. If anything, I find the flaunting of bodies distasteful. (That’s just me.) Men are such weak characters when it comes to nice bodies. (Remember I'm having fun with this.)
Then it happened…..
The OPPORTUNITY TO UNDERSTAND
When this Coppertone young man started coming in wearing his cutoff blue jeans, sleeveless sweatshirt cut up the sides and hiking boots just like my 14-year-old neighbor boy when I was 12, my brain flashed back. Only this guy is built like my neighbor boy never was! This guy is built like the best of the Marlboro men and straight Brawny lads, Texas fireman... this boy's been in the fields!
Now he’s flashing that big dimple saying he wants to do my yard work?
Can he have my phone # to schedule a time to look at the yard?
And always a big dimpled grin and a hug.
Lord have mercy.
Now I realize this is no doubt a “mother complex” this young man is facing.
Much the same as young girls facing a “father complex” and being attracted to a
“fatherly figure”.
Kids like me. They always have.
I’ve just never had occasion to adopt a young man in his late 30s before.
Then my 30 year old daughter asked, "Are you sure this guy doesn't have
a crush on you?" Naw......
I NOW UNDERSTAND how men get "caught up"
This kind of attention is hard to turn down.
No matter what the reason
No matter how well we analyze it
The ego is in there saying,
“This sure feels good…..
this person picked “me”!
Could it be that I’m just
Pretty damn “hot?”
Probably not, but that’s what we would
Like to hope…. Maybe? Naw….
But still….. and it may even be what they tell us (for now).
So gentlemen, to those of you who resist such temptations of “sweet young things”, my hat goes off to you. (Always did, but now with greater appreciation.)
And to those of you who simply “get caught up”….
I still think you need to “get real” and think before you leap,
but I do have
A NEW UNDERSTANDING
Lord help us all.
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| Jan 31 @ 9:47 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 13,027
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Perhaps he meant sexy as a piglet. And the dudes just into beasties? 
Good morning my friend 
Mark this chap under the simply fascinating.
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| Jan 31 @ 9:56 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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Awww Burns, you always know just the right thing to say... And like I said before... IF I was, but I ain't the kind... I'd offer to "buy you up"
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| Jan 31 @ 10:30 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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summerbreeze916
Posts: 1,042
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 Nice re-write, Pat! 
So when is this gorgeous.......ummm.......I mean, nice......young man coming to check out your.......ummm..........what was the word you used? Geez.........it's hell getting older.........OH, YEAH!!! Yard!!!!! 
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| Jan 31 @ 10:50 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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WouldntItBeGr8To
Posts: 957
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Thank you Pat for bringing this to the forums...I really do wonder how honest we all can be?
In the blogs one can only make one comment and it makes for a place where one can hide behind their one comment.
Your blog, the one you have posted in here really calls out for people to look at themselves in a very honest and open way. You share the thrill of feeling attractive to someone you find sexually desirable, and what the heck is wrong with that? Why not go there, we are all adults!!
Can we draw a line and say...this is just for fun  
Does that make someone less? To just want their sexual desires fulfilled?
Who gets hurt if their is an understanding?  
And to just share that it felt good to fantisize, well their is nothing wrong with THAT! And should one feel guilty about thinking about it? What about DOING it, just once? Or how about twice? At what point does it make us less of a person? Does it? Does it matter? Isn't it our life? Our choice? Don't we have to live with our actions? Who gets to judge us?
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| Jan 31 @ 10:55 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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burnslikethesun
Posts: 13,027
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I really do wonder how honest we all can be?
Yes I understand that what I may write and say maybe be sexist, but all you biotches and hoes should know Im trying to o correct this.
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| Jan 31 @ 11:17 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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Summer -- I haven't taken the Brawny guy up on his offer to do yard work. He still comes in where I work & we exchange hugs. One of life's small pleasures to compensate for the $$$ they don't pay me. Oh &.... I think you'll want to read the story LuvsHorses posted in my blog.
Burns -- and you do so well.... you have never behaved in an ill manner in my blogs and it is greatly appreciated.
&
WIBGr8 -- even God doesn't judge us until the end... far be it from me to judge others for their choices. I just try to watch for consequences of my own. 
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| Jan 31 @ 11:41 AM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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He could be just a very nice young man.....how did he know about your yard? I mean, if you've come to kind of a "friendship" and you told him something....he may just want to help a friend.
But I see where you're coming from....
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| Jan 31 @ 12:48 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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WouldntItBeGr8To
Posts: 957
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WIBGr8 -- even God doesn't judge us until the end... far be it from me to judge others for their choices. I just try to watch for consequences of my own.
Yes Pat, from what I know of you, you take full responsibility for your actions and for that you get all the respect in the world from me 
gr8
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| Jan 31 @ 2:54 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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keeno
Posts: 2,363
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since i was the one who called cjp a stinker in a private email, here's why i did.
women are such a "team" maybe i read this into cjp's original blog about the young guy, but she seemed to be getting "hot and bothered" by this guys' regular appearance. to which several ladies chimed in with their support. 
my point was that if a guy had posted something like that it would have been ignored, he might have been told to take it to adult matchdoctor, for sure no other guys would have openly supported the statement. i do have the feeling that it would have created a negative impression of the writer, whether or not expressed in the comments.
let me just add this, i am a big fan, supporter and friend of cjp's. i have thought of her as sexy but not sexist. 
edited to add this comment i posted in cjp's blog:
i can't help but think that some "ladies" (not all ladies) with cleavage pics are "on the prowl"
[Edited on 1/31/2009 3:01 PM]
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| Jan 31 @ 3:21 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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Now Keeno.... you're certainly not meaning to say I ain't got no couth are you????
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| Jan 31 @ 3:31 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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keeno
Posts: 2,363
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cjp, i know you've had several surgeries when did they take out your "couth?"
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| Jan 31 @ 3:37 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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WouldntItBeGr8To
Posts: 957
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my point was that if a guy had posted something like that it would have been ignored, he might have been told to take it to adult matchdoctor, for sure no other guys would have openly supported the statement.
wow Keeno! You hit the nail on the head with all you said
And the above comment is the best! I think that is the core of all of what we should do as we do a self inventory
Excellent comment!
It is always good to check ourselves out sometimes, see who we really are 
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| Jan 31 @ 3:45 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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keeno
Posts: 2,363
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for sure no other guys would have openly supported the statement.
i should have added, they might ask if i got pictures and to send them if i did.....
self inventory? have you been watching dr. phil again? not everyone takes the time for "self inventory" it's easier to just blame the people who are not in the room.
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| Jan 31 @ 4:20 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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yep.... Keeno & Gr8..... blame the removal of my couth on the doctors... who were however "in the room" I guess I was the one MIA
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| Jan 31 @ 9:39 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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missliss78
Posts: 5,189
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As one of the "ladies" who was in full support & totally excited for the "pleasure" Ms. Pat had received from the young man visiting her office....much of my happiness for her stems from knowing what her life has been filled with in the last year or so...and knowing that by seeing & acknowledging this gentleman in her office, she is still a vibrant woman with loads of life still in her!
I reiterate....you go, Pat!
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| Jan 31 @ 9:51 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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SpiritOrnery
Posts: 24,138
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 I see nothing wrong with anyone enjoying attention lavished on them myself. I never considered ANY man or woman to be a sexist pig if they stated they enjoyed some attention. Nor have I seen anyone say anything derogatory about anyone enjoying attention.
I have seen people go on about some hot little YOUNG number they would like to do _______ (whatever you can remember seeing written that is vulgar) and those are the ones I wonder about. I do not comment on their blogs tho. It is not up to me to tell them they are wrong or bad and I certainly don't choose to give them attention when they are vulgar. I mean, I do not reward what I consider bad behavior.
Having grown up with my brother who was an extremely spoiled child, I know what happens when you reward bad behavior. He is a drug addict and multiple offender, in and out of jails. So, I just do not comment... and just go on.
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| Jan 31 @ 10:35 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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CrackerJackPat
Posts: 794
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I think Keeno was just funnin' with me. It did bring up food for thought however.
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| Jan 31 @ 10:45 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales
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signme
Posts: 12,578
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Nothing wrong with enjoying some attention from the opposite sex. Nothing wrong with it going farther if both are free and single and of consenting age either. Geez! Why is always ok for the old guys to get the young girls but the older women are considered sleazy if they go out with a younger guy? Double standards for sure.
But Pat, I get what you are saying in that, hello?? Do you really think this young one is in love?? Take a few extra looks at yourself and see what it is they really want. Must be something, right? If not, Pat, go for it!!
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| Feb 1 @ 1:01 PM |
"Sexist Pigs", "Dirty Old Men", "Crazy Old Women" & other such labels and tales |
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WouldntItBeGr8To
Posts: 957
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Bottom line...if both are over 18 they can do whatever they want! I have felt the thrill of a womans lips who was quite a bit older then me...she felt it too, me being younger. Younger as in in my late 40s.....we were "up to no good"  ...boy was it fun to play! To do something we weren't "supposed to do"  ....two adults sharing an attraction 
It didn't go any further, maybe if the time is right we will meet again, but it was fun to "break the rules"
I have never listened to or followed the "rules" 
If communication is there...no one gets hurt, both can see if their dreams come true. At this point in life, enough dreams have not come true that it is really no big deal, just another experience...KEEP ON LIVING!! 
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