| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:04 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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If people are spreading rumors about you to friends, potential friends, neighbors, cyber-friends, etc.......
Is it better to "let the facts speak for themselves"?
Or confront your accuser? Do people really LISTEN to gossip? Do you trust the word of others?
Or are you independant enough to make-up your own mind? Is it better to vent & defend? Or let it ride & hope people are smart enough to figure out, what's going on?
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:14 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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HarleysB_WV
Posts: 860
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For me it depends on what their gossip is about. If it's about my personal life, I tend to let it go and not worry about it. If it's about my business though, I try to pull the person off to the side and find out what the problem is (if it's a real problem) and then make amends as quickly as possible. If it wasn't an actual customer of mine who is starting rumors, then I usually let that go. In the small town that I live in gossip is considered a sporting event. lol. It's going to happen and we have to learn quickly whats worth looking into and what isn't. A lot depends on who is starting the gossip. Some people just have a "reputation" for being gossip's and no one really pays them any mind around here.
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:24 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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MICHIGANGIRL11
Posts: 1,649
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Tink.....good topic. (Glad your back) I look at it this way, if people want to gossip about me, let them, they apparently don't have enough to do. The people who know me (family/friends) know me well enough to know what kind of a person I am. If my circle of family/friends hear gossip about me they will ask me before they assume it is true and vice versa. Take everything you hear with a grain of salt, there is certainly more to life than worrying about what the next person thinks or is saying about you.
Enjoy the day.
Migirl11
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:30 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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I think what a person thinks of themselves is more important than what others think. Some I have let ride, but then there are some I have defended, depending on the person and the remarks that have been made. A person is only as good as their word and I have found some that speak with forked tongue. Do I trust the word of others? I used to, its getting harder and harder. Am I independant enough to make up my own mind, of course I am.But sometimes I feel its better to vent, get it all out in the open and over and done with. However sometimes people will Just NOT let things go. It all depends on the situation at hand I guess.
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:33 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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franc0
Posts: 50
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depends on the situation, if it does not affect others, i should let it go. why bother if its not true?
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 7:45 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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Some I have let ride, but then there are some I have defended, depending on the person and the remarks that have been made
 gonna quote myself here..what if the person you were defending was...say your child and the gossip was something that could make his/her life miserable and knowing that such gossip was lies.Would you then defend that child? Knowing how such gossip can harm a childs emotional well-being? I would in a heart-beat..
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 8:09 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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MICHIGANGIRL11
Posts: 1,649
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Absolutely......in regards to myself, let it go. I would and have defended my friends and family. My father has said time and time again. "Mess w/my kid, you mess w/me". Dad can be overprotective at times, but I love him.
Migirl11 
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 8:29 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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"Mess w/my kid, you mess w/me".
 I always say...You can mess with Me but don`t mess with my kids..
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 9:53 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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Lovely1368
Posts: 112
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When it comes to any rumor about anyone or anything, I sure don't believe it, unless I have proof of it. I would hope that others would have enough sense, and if they don't, why should their stupidity bother me? Have been the target of rumors for as long as I can remember. One person in particular loves to tell people stories. By now, anyone comes to me saying "she said..." I always respond with, "And you are still stupid enough to believe anything she says? If you want to know the truth, ask."
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 9:55 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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jim9562
Posts: 620
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a way to a stress free life,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,believe half of what you see and none of what you hear 
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 10:14 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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a way to a stress free life,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,believe half of what you see and none of what you hear
But to a child that can be a rather difficult task...they tend to take everything they see and hear to heart...
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 10:38 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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HarleysB_WV
Posts: 860
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I have a little spin to put on this. Hope it's ok.
Would you let someone know that you were told certain things about them?? Especially if looks like the person telling you is just out to bash them and give them a hard time?? If it was something malicious and mean regarding you and it was being done behind your back, would you want someone to let you know??
To some it would be "keeping the gossip alive" or "feeding the gossips". But to others it would be considered a loyalty or a kindness. If it were YOU that was being talked about in a fairly harmful way, would you want someone to let you know so that you COULD deal with it yourself??
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 10:46 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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If it were YOU that was being talked about in a fairly harmful way, would you want someone to let you know so that you COULD deal with it yourself??
Good point Harley.. 
As to the question..I would want to know...there are those who tend to thrive on malicious gossip and I would surely want to be able to defend myself against any vicious rumors being spread..gossip can put doubt into even the closest of your friends minds..
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 10:54 AM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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HarleysB_WV
Posts: 860
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Thanks Tink!! I am of the same thinking. I would prefer that someone let me know.
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 12:25 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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kattsmeow
Posts: 22,629
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[QUOTE]say your child and the gossip was something that could make his/her life miserable and knowing that such gossip was lies.Would you then defend that child? Knowing how such gossip can harm a childs emotional well-being? I would in a heart-beat..
Ya baby,,like a mother tiger......
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 12:56 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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Ya baby,,like a mother tiger......
grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 1:11 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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chinabull2000
Posts: 7,012
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Of course it depends on the situation, and how harmful the rumour-mongering is, but yes, people do unfortunately believe a lot of rumours. And I always confront people who have a problem with me, and if they are spreading malicious gossip, then I will deal with them straightaway.
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 1:16 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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and if they are spreading malicious gossip, then I will deal with them straightaway.
Otherwise they won`t give up...I`ve often thought of retaliating but then that would be stooping to their level..and that just isn`t my way..
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 1:18 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go?
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chinabull2000
Posts: 7,012
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Otherwise they won`t give up...I`ve often thought of retaliating but then that would be stooping to their level.. Absolutely! If they get away with it without being confronted then they will just carry on, and there is absolutely no point in stooping down to their level!
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| Apr 19, 2006 @ 1:20 PM |
Better To Defend Your Reputation? Or Let It Go? |
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kattsmeow
Posts: 22,629
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I agree with Tink, and China!!!!! 
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