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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 1:23 AM |
How long does one wait?
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creamqueeny
Posts: 26
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After years of not wishing to commit, I have finally decided I'm ready.
I met an awesome person on Wednesday. We hung out that day until the next morning. Anyways, it was our first date and we didn't "do it" 
However, my question is.. to the guys.. what is a reasonable amount of time before it should happen?
I'm beyond confused! Please  me!
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 2:23 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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How long you stay together is not based on how long you wait.
It is based on communication and compatibility.
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 10:45 AM |
How long does one wait?
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AngelLight
Posts: 5,464
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Just a woman's perspective......
I don't think there are any "shoulds" here concerning the amount of time to wait, but there are some considerations.
You've only been on a first date with this man and if you had a great time that doesn't mean you need to jump into bed right away, particularly if you're looking for a committed relationship.....Do you know if he is looking for the same thing in relationship to you?
If he is not, and you move too quickly, you may end up giving your heart and body to a stranger who walks away from you much sooner than you would like.
If you both take the time to get to know one another, despite sexual tension, there will be no confusion whatsoever as to timing.....You'll both know when it's right for the two of you.
If this person is awesome and he feels the same way about you, he will not rush a thing. If he's not interested in anything long term, waiting may not be an issue for him, and afterwards, he may just quickly move on.
Good luck to you with whatever it is that you decide to do.
AngelLight
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 11:17 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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lynnielou
Posts: 2,756
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That was a great answer, and I totally agree with AngelLight. She hit the nail on the head!
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 12:31 PM |
How long does one wait?
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Luisa909
Posts: 1,571
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I don't know how American men are, but I know how Italian men are .....
your man has an open mind and you feel ready to "do it" ?
Ok do it without troubles ....
Your man thinks that "do it" at the first date could be inconvenient ?
ok wait for a while ....
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 12:49 PM |
How long does one wait? |
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blueyes101
Posts: 8,307
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In my last 2 relationships I slept with each of them on the first date, the first lasted 2 years, and the second lasted 5+ years. Obviously they felt there was a connection, we enjoyed the initial date, and were making plans to share each others company in the future, we were lucky that our relationship was never centered around sex, but found it a wonderful addition. Each time they trusted me, and I never betrayed that trust.
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 1:35 PM |
How long does one wait?
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Antoinette8
Posts: 431
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How long you stay together is not based on how long you wait.
It is based on communication and compatibility.
Comunication is the key
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 1:37 PM |
How long does one wait? |
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lynnielou
Posts: 2,756
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Some of us aren't that lucky!
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 6:50 PM |
How long does one wait?
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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Luck, hmmm,
well, everyone sees their being in a particular way. No one view governs all.
It takes awhile to get to know someone, and thus from that point of view, you dont want someone you barely know to have that kind of intimate information.
for me personally, intimacy is mental, not physical. but that is just me.
I try to take the soul's view these days.
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 7:58 PM |
How long does one wait? |
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waterfire
Posts: 2,923
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Being a guy I would say like NOW…BUT on a real level just take your time, do not give into hormones and just enjoy, let it happen as you feel.
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 10:26 PM |
How long does one wait?
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Shortiaintlying
Posts: 1,324
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Too ph@k!n long!!
But when it is when, its then, and thens oh soo great. so learn heal grow and go get some more.
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| Apr 7, 2007 @ 11:56 PM |
How long does one wait? |
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creamqueeny
Posts: 26
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we're both looking for a LTR.. and we've discussed future possibilities.. we had a great connection and OH MY do i wanna "do it"... i suppose i'll wait and see where it leads.
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| Apr 8, 2007 @ 1:52 AM |
How long does one wait?
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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A LTR is always choosing to be with him now.
A soul relationship is when you see all that is revealed now.
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| Apr 8, 2007 @ 3:28 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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theobono
Posts: 2,111
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Creammy....don't put any time frame on it. Just let the story will unfold naturally and comfortably. If there's a mutual attraction and possitive vibe, then it will happen when it's meant to. Sex is not the be all end all in a relationship. If the sexual chemistry isn't there, wouldn't you rather want to find out sooner than later  
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| Apr 8, 2007 @ 4:25 AM |
How long does one wait?
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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That is just it,
when you are choosing just one, the only way to find out is to dive in.
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| Apr 8, 2007 @ 4:44 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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JesterDrawers
Posts: 10,902
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Don't rush it. Get to know each other first. Studies have shown that the longer a couple waits before introducing sex into their relationship, the greater that relationship has a chance for long-term survival. I'm not suggesting you wait, like 175 years or anything - but make sure you are compatible on all levels - mental, emotional, and spiritual - before introducing the physical into the relationship. I think, for the most part, when you introduce physical intimacy into a relationship prematurely, you run the risk of having that relationship center around the physical. But there's nothing better than true EMOTIONAL intimacy, so make sure that's there first and foremost, and the rest will follow quite naturally.
Good luck to you!
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| Apr 8, 2007 @ 9:54 AM |
How long does one wait?
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Shortiaintlying
Posts: 1,324
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Don't rush it. Get to know each other first. Here here.
dont miss understand me. Too fing long is how it feels for everyone, til it happens.
yet I noticed, ya did say wait and see.
Just know what youre seeing first.
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| Apr 9, 2007 @ 1:36 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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for some sex is the most important aspect, for others it is other aspects, like communication or compatibility.
Most hold out for the magic of having the other read the signals. That sensitivity that says they are listening to you.
either way someone is always the grounding influence and it is their thoughts that make it LTR or not, the other simply chooses based on what is happening.
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| Apr 9, 2007 @ 6:17 AM |
How long does one wait?
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Antoinette8
Posts: 431
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How long you stay together is not based on how long you wait.
It is based on communication and compatibility
What constitutes compatibility?
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| Apr 11, 2007 @ 10:05 AM |
How long does one wait? |
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medisynergi
Posts: 314
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Compatibility is based on a number of issues. simply,
age and background come first.
then your particular inner being.
then how you organise your external reality.
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