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| Feb 17 @ 12:43 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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violette1967
Posts: 402
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OK, hope this question belongs in here...
If you are dating someone, and your relationship is having some trouble and sex has been lacking, and now you are trying to work things out, things seem to be going well.... and yet still no sex?
What if he/she tells you that they love you, but everytime you try to make an advance you are turned down?
Do they really just don't feel like it? Are they having emotional issues? Are they turned off by what they see now?
Other than cheating or smoking weed....what else might cause this lack of lust?
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| Feb 17 @ 12:46 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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If you are close enough to the person emotionally to actually be trying to have sex....aren't you close enough to ask them? 
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| Feb 17 @ 12:48 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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violette1967
Posts: 402
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I did ask....and the answer was no....
Forr some reason I just don't believe it. It's hard to.
They say a womans hunch is always right....
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| Feb 17 @ 12:50 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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No...I didn't mean, ask for sex...I meant ask why it's always that he dosen't feel like it...
By the way....a woman's intuitions is 99.9% right 
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| Feb 17 @ 1:22 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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CathyCRN
Posts: 1,683
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I can't imagine being in that situation...I've never had a man turn me down when it comes to sex...if I were involved with him and he pulled away or refused sex, I guarantee you that there would be some discussion going on. If you feel that something is not right, listen to yourself...he needs to tell you what he is feeling and/or why he would turn away from that part of the relationship....I, personally, could not deal with that without a darned good reason.
btw, it's really easy to SAY you love another person...but actions speak much louder than words...jmo
[Edited on 2/17/2008 1:25 PM]
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| Feb 17 @ 1:24 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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I agreee...can't see me staying in a situation where I wanted it and he didn't... at least not for very long....
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| Feb 17 @ 1:27 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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LipGlossQueen9
Posts: 9,757
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he might be suffering from depression.
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| Feb 17 @ 1:35 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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That is very possible....but how long should she wait?
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| Feb 17 @ 1:36 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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CathyCRN
Posts: 1,683
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If that is the case, he should be exhibiting other signs. He would probably withdraw from the entire relationship, not just the sex...
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| Feb 17 @ 1:40 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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That is very true Cathy...sounds like he is though
If nothing feels the same to her and he is withdrawing in every regard...maybe she should just cut her losses and move on....maybe he will come back...but at least he will know that she is not clingy and needy 
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| Feb 17 @ 1:41 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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CathyCRN
Posts: 1,683
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Good advice, Angel...
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| Feb 17 @ 1:42 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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Thanks Cathy 
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| Feb 17 @ 2:11 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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violette1967
Posts: 402
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Hmmm...thanks ladies. Good Advice.
Let me just add that I am not clinging to him, he comes and goes as he pleases. Is often late from work and smokes a lot of weed. Depression? Sure that may have been the case when his dad died a month ago. But should that not be somewhat healed by now?
He gets jealous when I am not home right away, he always accuses me of seeing someone else. I think it's all guilt speaking.
Yeah, I am going to leave him. I just need a good reason. I guess I am hoping he truly is having an affair. It makes the break-up easier. If it were because he is depressed I would feel like a real heartbreaker.
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| Feb 17 @ 2:17 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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Please e-mail me privately violette...
but you don't need him to have an affair to break it off and you don't need to excuse the pot smoking by his father's death...you deserve much much more
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| Feb 17 @ 2:23 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 14,386
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Generally the death of someone close makes the need to affirm life pretty strong, at least for me...sex is one of the most life-affirming activities we have.
Has he had a medical checkup? There are plenty of things that cause erectile dysfuntion, which a lot of men just don't feel comfortable admitting to... 
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| Feb 17 @ 2:25 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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parrothead1234
Posts: 270
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So he can come & go but you can't? I wouldn't stand for that - the double standard thing stinks 
It's one thing wanting to be "in the know" about the other persons day & what they've got going on. It's a completely different thing to time arrivals & departures like a bus schedule. jmo
As far as his Dad passing goes, you can't discount it, & you can't read to much into it. I know this from first hand experience as my Dad passed away last May. You have good days & bad, but you still have to got through the "year of firsts." Your day will be going along fine, then you here Dad's favorite song on the radio & your world & mindset are completely changed for the rest of the day minimum. Sometimes it takes awhile to get your mind back on track. Everyone grieves differently of course, but most people go through these phases in varying degrees/extents.
I'd suggest cutting him some slack regarding his Dad.
As far as the "control freak" thing goes - kick him to the curb. Odds are he was a control freak long before his Dad passed, & that probably won't change. JMO
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| Feb 17 @ 2:28 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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violette1967
Posts: 402
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Oh Heaven....
There is no "erectile dysfunction" going on. I can attest to that.
Yeah.....I'm putting on my boots for a good-bye kick :)
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| Feb 17 @ 2:32 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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Ok...are you talking about the same guy parrot?
You have just given every excuse for every guy...I'm not sure where you are going with this or if you are making every excuse there is for his behavior?
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| Feb 17 @ 2:41 PM |
I just don't feel like it.....
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Loreli
Posts: 18,667
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If you are dating someone, and your relationship is having some trouble and sex has been lacking, and now you are trying to work things out, things seem to be going well.... and yet still no sex? But now you're gonna kick him to the curb? What if he/she tells you that they love you, but everytime you try to make an advance you are turned down? You need to talk to each other, not us....and a counselorDo they really just don't feel like it? Are they having emotional issues? Are they turned off by what they see now? Only they know thatOther than cheating or smoking weed....what else might cause this lack of lust? Many things could cause it...we aren't hearing the whole story...it could be something so important |
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| Feb 17 @ 2:43 PM |
I just don't feel like it..... |
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Angel178
Posts: 21,583
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violette...read your e-mail...lots of people that can relate and give advise
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< previous page | next page >
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