|
page:
<<
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
>>
of 17 pages
|
< previous page | next page >
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 12:26 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
Mischief484
Posts: 645
|
I have a friend with benefits who lives in the Atlanta, GA metro area. She's a single mom and a pretty high ranking government official. I met her through another service a few years ago. We see each other once or twice a month. We have both expressed satisfaction in the arrangement and the sex is absolutely smokin' hot.
Another female friend of mine (who I'm not porkin') has told me that my powerful and sexy partner is lying to me. She says that women cannot maintain a sexual relationship without romantic love.
I say she is wrong. My friend has jokingly told me that she was only using me for sex. But she has also told me how much she appreciates my discretion and my respect for her freedom.
What say you, denizens of MD? Is she secretly in love with me?
|
|
  |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 12:34 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
richmondcowgirl83
Posts: 1,062
|
This goes back to the "she loves you but not IN love with you"
I have several friends with favors & I've only fallin in love with one of them, which after he found out it was all over. Word of advice: Emotions Ruin Friendships.
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 12:56 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
swingpup
Posts: 4,105
|
Seems that often times it begins as friends with benefits, I know where you are coming from. After weeks, months or maybe even as long as a year....love most always will enter into the picture. The "let's live together" "Let's get married" thing will surface.
Depending upon the circumstance as well as your and of course her desires it maybe eventual over. She many simply discover someone that will not only provide the sex but the relationship aspect as well. Good luck. 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:09 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
mangolover60
Posts: 635
|
have a friend with benefits who lives in the Atlanta, GA metro area. She's a single mom and a pretty high ranking government official.
Hey, I know her. She told me the same thing. 
Just joking. 
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:09 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
kaden69
Posts: 529
|
She says that women cannot maintain a sexual relationship without romantic love
yeah right!,.... the truth iz I never "dated" in my youth,... i wasn't into all the lovey gooey BF GF crap,... so all of my encounters were my friends to begin with,... and yeah some with benefits 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:20 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
EyesofBlue72660
Posts: 12,795
|
Chief.......I don't believe in the statement "women cannot maintain a sexual relationship without romantic love". Just as I don't believe that a man and a woman cannot be friends without becoming sexually involved. I'm probably in the small minority thinking that. However, I've seen and experienced such friendships and feel fortunate that I've been able to broaden my experiences and outlook on such things!!! 
It sounds like your "friend with benefits" is a pretty confident woman and secure in where she is in Life!!!! It also sounds like if either of you should start to feel that you want more out of your relationship, you are close enough to be able to discuss that; and determine if it is only one-sided that perhaps the sexual relationship should end before either one gets hurt! And I'd be willing to bet that you could even become "friends without 'benefits'"!!!
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:20 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
Mischief484
Posts: 645
|
LOL Mango
Kaden, I was into the whole gooey GF/BF thing when I was younger. I got more confused as I went along, then got married, then got divorced, and before I knew it I was screwed up six ways to Sunday.
Life is so much better now...
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:28 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
peaches_n_cream2002
Posts: 302
|
It's definitely possible for women to participate in just friendly/casual sex and not get attached romantically, but I think it's difficult for a lot of us, and nearly impossible to not get attached in an emotional, yet not romantic way.
I attach to people easily, whether I ever touch them or not. I make friends quickly and my friends are my friends forever, which is in itself an attachment.
I had a FWB relationship with a guy that was working out greatly. Then he brought up the idea of exclusivity (just sexually exclusive, not relationship-wise) and me moving closer to him, and talked about allowing myself to be cared about by him.
All that talk severely confused me, and from there on out, the whole thing just got really jacked up.
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 1:41 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
Mischief484
Posts: 645
|
Woot Woot!
Yeah, China. I think so too. Maybe this other female friend is interested in me, and maybe she told me this story to start the process of getting the power broker out of the way.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 3:03 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
chinabull2000
Posts: 7,012
|
Yep, maybe she did, women can be quite cunning that way! lol 
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 6:21 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
|
I commented on this in another thread, friends with benefits is the best arrangement ever...though I've found that the man is the one that want's to take things to "the next level".... or get too emotionally involved.....
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 6:38 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
wandaful123
Posts: 1,511
|
Agree with Bphreeke.... seems as we age it tends to be men who are getting more demanding relationship and committment wise. I had one of these "friends" whom I enjoyed a great deal, intellectually and physically, but because of some belief systems we strongly disagreed on I knew there was no way I could ever make a committment to this guy. He agreed verbally that we would remain "friends" but his actions and possesive behaivour spoke much louder. needless to say it ended and not pleasantly.
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 7:31 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
DipityDoo
Posts: 376
|
Yeah, China. I think so too. Maybe this other female friend is interested in me, and maybe she told me this story to start the process of getting the power broker out of the way.
haha, the male ego strikes again???? Or MAYBE she just has a big mouth and is very certain that her opinons are facts! Well, anyway, when I read it, it sounded to me like she was a know-it-all who proclaims that the way it is for her (or at least the way she assumes it is for her, maybe she doesn't even know herself!) is the way it is for everybody.
Of course women are capable of having that kind of arrangement. And ask yourself this....if she's successful and attractive AND wanted more of a relationship, would she really have to resort to duplictious means to extract a relationship out of someone if that's what she wanted???
Oh, and.......high-ranking government official, Atlanta.....CDC? I'd be careful of posting details such as that if you want to remain discreet.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 7:42 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
|
Ok, I never said there were NO feelings...I love my friend dearly, but I am not in love with him...nor he with me... I do care very much about him. But with the age difference and the fact he wants children of his own someday makes even THINKING of pursuing anything serious impossible..we do however have a lot in common, and there was a spark of sexual attraction that we decided to act on...I am in a sexless relationship where we are at this point financially dependent on each other.....and he isn't looking to settle down for a while, AND wants to gain some sexual experience ( he was actually a virgin b4 me) in hopes of better pleasing his future mate....
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 8:00 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
torees121
Posts: 739
|
Well after my life experience I have to say that I agree with waiting on this one. I am not interested in a superficial non romantic relationship. I have had my share and they ALWAYS turned out badly.
Mischief-- in my opinion if she is still only wanting you for sex only, then she must not think that you have the other characteristics she seeks for a relationship. When she finds the man that fulfills all her desires then you will be gone and so will the sex. Sex is always better in a relationship because there are feelings.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 8:07 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
Star22
Posts: 95
|
I also agree w/ waiting and torees on this topic
"Sex is always better in a relationship because there are feelings."
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 8:08 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
DipityDoo
Posts: 376
|
Well after my life experience I have to say that I agree with waiting on this one. I am not interested in a superficial non romantic relationship. I have had my share and they ALWAYS turned out badly.
Mischief-- in my opinion if she is still only wanting you for sex only, then she must not think that you have the other characteristics she seeks for a relationship. When she finds the man that fulfills all her desires then you will be gone and so will the sex. Sex is always better in a relationship because there are feelings.
But, I think you're overlooking the fact that she may not want ANY "real" relationship at this time and so the "when she finds...." clause has not place here. Some people are just like that for good; some people are just like that at particular spots in their lives.
And the second part about a sex-only relationship is that there are no strings attached....meaning when one wants to leave, one leaves with no mess. Of course she (or he) and the sex will be gone at some point.
And yes, I definitely agree that sex in the relationship is so much better.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 8:15 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
torees121
Posts: 739
|
And yes, I definitely agree that sex in the relationship is so much better.
Well I want the BEST sex, so I will wait till I am in a relationship.
Did you know that women release a "love" hormone when they orgasm? I have been in a couple and have plenty of friends that are in these relationship. They all ended because someone got feelings, whether they be of jealousy, frustration, or love. If someone can be in this type of relationship than I think it is because you are lacking in something else. I mean anyone can have sex, but not everyone can have sex with someone that loves them.
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 11:20 PM |
Friends with benefits?
|
|
richmondcowgirl83
Posts: 1,062
|
I fully support FWB, as long as you both understand that its only that. I have a couple mostly guys I've dated before & we didn't work out. Usually it was a jealously issue cause I am a natural flirty person. I don't mean to but I am. It's easier to be with that person with the understanding of there is no feelings or emotions involved in this.
I love to swim the warm waters of sins of the flesh....
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2005 @ 11:28 PM |
Friends with benefits? |
|
JesterDrawers
Posts: 10,902
|
Can a woman maintain a sexual relationship without romantic love? I would say that it is entirely possible for a woman to do this. My ex has done it several times! LOL I do believe, however, that with women it is the exception rather than the rule.
And, I agree wholeheartedly with torres and waiting, in that to first have the feelings for the other person, to not only love but to be IN LOVE, is a far better place to be. I, for one, would prefer to have love instead of sex any day of the week, if I could only choose one. But to have the love first, and then to express that within the context of a physical relationship as well, is truly heaven on earth, and to do less, to explore the physical relationship only without first forming the emotional relationship, to me sounds empty and undesirable.
And before the other pundits assume that I've never had sex without love, well...I have. But I never will again. For it was a completely empty experience. I don't want someone I can spend time in bed with. I want someone that I can spend time with, someone that I WANT to spend time with....both in and out of bed.
Can a woman have a sexual relationship without having a romantic relationship? YES But if she does, she's missing out on a lot....a LOT...but then, you have to have to have been in a place to know what sex after first forming that mental, emotional, and spiritual bond is before you can even glimpse what you're missing.
There's my $.02---
|
| |
|
|
|
page:
<<
1
2
3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
>>
of 17 pages
|
< previous page | next page >
|
|