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| Sep 14 @ 9:19 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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Christians
You may be a fundy if..
You think if a Christian won't address your arguments, they are too frightened to do so, or know they can't answer them; but if they do address your arguments, you think it is because they are "threatened" by them.
Missionaries who give up their personal comfort to aid starving, impoverished and persecuted third-world people are actually "corrupting ancient tribal cultures with western religious dogma", while you sit at home and complain about the price of KFC.
You believe that any Christian who claims to have once been an atheist is either lying or was never a "true atheist."
You think that John Shelby Spong is a reputable theologian but that Ben Witherington is merely an ignorant biblicist.
You assert that the crimes and failings of some Christians (acting inconsistently with the teachings of Christ at that!) disproves the whole edifice of Christianity but that the crimes and failings of some atheists (acting consistently with the fact that atheism can provide no basis for objective morality!) should on no account be held against the philosophy of atheism.
You assert that there is no absolute categories of good and evil, that all morals are merely personal, social and evolutionary constructs but then you can still describe Christians and Christianity as absolutely immoral, repugnant and evil and a danger to humanity and not feel even a twinge of hypocrisy at the monumental illogic of your position.
You think that Josh McDowell represents the apex of Christian scholarly apologetical thinking.
You lump all Christians in with whatever religious fruitcake is the flavour of the month, while living with the delusion that there are no atheistic weirdos out there.
You KNOW that religion causes violence and repeatedly tell this to everyone, hoping to save the world, but you don't believe that TV violence causes any real life violence. In fact, you are offended by this objection, and you have already started to figure out how to refute it. To increase your fundy factor, you have decided not to study social sciences. (Once you heard about Rodney Stark's For the Glory of God - you certainly would not bother reading it - you thought that sociologists were Christian fundamentalists in stealth mode, trying to push religious worldviews.
You think that taking the Bible seriously is the obsession of a fanatical fringe group of right-wing, extremist Christians who do not represent the views of the historic Church or of contemporary enlightened, liberal, skeptical "Christians" who according to you supposedly "fill" the mainstream churches and who on close inspection pretty much reflect your own politically correct views and values - and skepticism - about God. [Sort of like former Bishop Spong].
You claim that the theories and opinions of certain liberal scholars are absolute facts although you shy away from debating such issues with someone equally or better informed than you are.
You get angry when Christians tell you you're going to a place that you don't think exists.
You're convinced that people only believe in God because they're afraid of going to hell...despite the fact that if there is no God, then there's probably no hell either.
You consistently decry Christians for soliciting financial support yet find no problem in atheistic 'missionaries' doing the same thing."
You think that 'mission statements' on Christian websites proves the authors are biased which automatically renders the material on those sites weak and unscholarly yet you see no problem with 'mission statements' glorifying naturalism found on atheistic websites.
When a group of Sydney University (Australia) academics, including a historian, sign a public statement saying the Jesus Christ is "one of the great figures of history" and that his claims to be Son of God "bear up under closest scrutiny", this is a gross abuse of their position. But when Richard Dawkins uses his position as an Oxford professor to pontificate on his atheistic religion and related philosophical matters outside HIS field (animal behavior), that is a responsible use of academic freedom.
Further to the above, you're paranoid that these Christian academics will discriminate against you, even though their statement hasn't the remotest hint of that. But you applaud Michael Dini, a professor at Texas Tech, who refuses to recommend students for Medical School, even if they got "A"s in their courses, unless they not only understand but BELIEVE in goo-to-you evolution. And you're disgusted that creationist medical doctors have the gall to think they know more about medicine than Dini (who never practised medicine or even went to medical school), because by definition an evolutionist is more knowledgeable than a creationist on ANY subject!
You think Christians are narrow-minded for believing in only one religion, but atheists are open-minded for believing in absolutely none.
You believe that Christianity discriminates, because you have to join their religion in order to be a member of their religion.
You feel that Christians who go into atheist chat rooms are "shoving their beliefs down people's throats", and that atheists who go into Christian chat rooms are only trying to educate.
http://www.tektonics.org/parody/fundyath.html
[Edited on 9/14/2008 9:35 AM]
[Edited on 9/14/2008 9:38 AM]
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| Sep 14 @ 9:26 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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rough
Posts: 703
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I can't read this, its all jumbled together - you need to leave a line between paragraphs. 
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| Sep 14 @ 9:28 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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Ahhh......Bev's trying to stir up the crap again. 
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| Sep 14 @ 9:29 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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Oh, I couldn't read it either, but I got the gist. 
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| Sep 14 @ 9:36 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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Lol, you should, I am laughing because it is all so true.
There is a whole bunch more on that site. I will post some more on here later, maybe.
[Edited on 9/14/2008 9:40 AM]
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| Sep 14 @ 9:38 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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And I'm laughing because you're an....................er.................never mind.
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| Sep 14 @ 9:38 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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16knots
Posts: 3,627
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Anyone waste their time reading past the first sentence.....
Careful, this thread is liable for self destruction.
STAND CLEAR!!!!
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| Sep 14 @ 9:39 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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Oh it's going to blow up, all right.
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| Sep 14 @ 9:43 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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sail_dancer
Posts: 8,495
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Ahhh......Bev's trying to stir up the crap again. Actually Bev is so irrational that she doesn't even realize that anyone with an open mind would agree with what the author of her quote (which she did not disclose or provide a link) defines as "fundy athiest" beliefs.
I couldn't stop laughing when I read it!
Especially when they mentioned med students that believe in creationism or intelligent design. I'm sure that everyone here would place their lives in the hands of a doctor that believes the earth is only 10,000 years old and that Liberty University has 6,000 year old dinosaur bones on display. Or that woman was created from a man's rib!
The article is full of crap and most christian know it but are afraid to admit it because of the dogma they have been indoctrinated with.
Ignorance! ..... Ignorance! ..... Ignorance!
Peace
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| Sep 14 @ 9:46 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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Ut oh....plagiarism again. 
I guess she liked her time out. It gave her tim to do good deeds in the name of God.
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| Sep 14 @ 9:50 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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Hmmm, mom, check your glasses, I see a link there.
Doesn't make US look ridiculous, it is the same old stuff you guys spout on here all the time. Maybe you will come up with some NEW stuff now.
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| Sep 14 @ 9:53 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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And 2 edits.
The only one it makes look ridiculous is you for posting a thread you know is going to get you attention. 
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| Sep 14 @ 9:58 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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History
Any scholar who believes in a historical Jesus must be a theist. If they are an atheist, then they must secretly want to be a theist.
You insist that "Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence", then claim that Jesus never existed.
You contend that no war in history has ever been created by non-belief. Yet, when you are told that 176 million people lost their lives in wars during the last century, created by non-believers like Stalin, Lenin, Mao and Hitler, to name only a few, you reply that those wars fought were fought in the name of ideology and not 'atheism' as atheists "…don't fly planes into buildings or start wars."
You accept (and quote back to Christians) any number of works that say Jesus wasn't the Son of God and call them "honest", "thought-provoking" and 'scholarly" proof, even when they completely contradict each other and come to completely different conclusions.
You think it's entirely possible for documents dated to the 10th century to have been forged in the 14th. (Used of Tacitus once.)
You believe that when our forefathers are framing the Constitution, they're staunch deists, but when they're beating their slaves, they're Bible-believing Christians.
You think that the Declaration of Independence is unconstitutional because it mentions "the creator".
On, that basis, You think that the Declaration is therefore void and the United States should return to British rule.
When it is returned to British rule, you plan to go straight to London and tell those Brits that having the Anglican church as a state church violates the constitutional separation of church and state.
When you use a historical point to prove Christianity is false (i.e., pagan parallel to Christianity), history is objective truth. When a Christian uses real historical scholarship to prove you false, history was written by subjective men and therefore cannot be trusted.
You reject what Cornelius Tacitus wrote about Jesus, dismissing it as "too late", but you readily accept what he wrote about Tiberius and Augustus.
100+ year old scholarship is good enough for you.
You think Bolshevik Revolution leader Leon Trotsky was a far better person than Mother Theresa.
You apparently think the first century AD was in the Stone Age, since you refer to Christianity as "Stone Age beliefs"
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When Christians tell you that The Bible is inerrant you go on and list a bunch of "contradictions"; when the Christian shows to you that those are not contradictions but the result of taking things out of context you list more "contradictions" when the Christian does the same with those you complain that he/she is just making stuff up and/or that the answer the Christian gives you are not "satisfactory" and proceed of course to list more "contradictions".
You like to complain about the wars and killings found in the Bible and like to claim that this is some sort of proof to conclude that it is not The Word of God. When the Christian points out that the Bible is about reality and that it exposes humanity and all what comes with it, you complain that it is nonsense and that no good God would allow for that to happen. You would then just claim that it is too perfect and not true.
You like to list contradictions to Christians like if you some how pretend that Christians are not aware of them or that they are igorant about their own religion.
You evidently think that slaughtering 6,000,000 Jews is no different from using sugar in your porridge,since whenever someone points out that Hitler's actions show him to VERY UN-Christian,you exclaim "No true Scotsman uses sugar in his porridge!"
You think historians Michael Grant and Robin Lane Fox are "religious nutcases" for believing Jesus existed.
You refuse to use the word "excruciating" because of its origins in describing the agonies of crucifixion. (ex crucis - "from the cross")
When a Christian tells you that in order to fully understand The Word of God you need to open up your heart and allow The Bible to speak to you and to read The Bible by placing confidence in God, you say that the Bible is just a book and that why you don't have to do the same with Harry Potter.
You always refer to C.S. Lewis as "that traitor."
You desperately wish that Stalin and Mao hadn't been atheists.
You absolutely insist a Christian recognize your nonscholar as an expert (G. A. Wells) but refuse to recognize his legitimate scholar as expert (Colin Hemer).
You not only spell "God" with a lower case "g," but you also add an "E" to "B.C.," and replace the word "Christ" with an "x." Yet, when asked to name the planets you have no problem with spouting out the appropriate list of Roman Gods. Heck, you'll even spell them with capital letters! Not only that, you can even spell and pronounce the name of the 800-mile-diameter Trans-Neptunian Object 'Quaoar', and are delighted that it comes from the creation mythology of the Tongva people (aka the San Gabrielino Native Americans).
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| Sep 14 @ 10:01 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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I'd rather have my teeth drilled with anesthesia than read all that.
Hurry and edited so you can add your link.
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| Sep 14 @ 10:02 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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16knots
Posts: 3,627
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Any scholar who believes in a historical Jesus must be a theist.
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| Sep 14 @ 10:04 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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http://www.tektonics.org/parody/fundyath.html
In addition, you say that terms like "AD", "BC" and "christmas" (as opposed to "winter holiday season" :D ) are medieval, outdated, bigoted poison and must be eliminated at all costs from the world, yet the fact that our months and days are largely named after Roman, viking etc. figures (eg. Janus - January, Thor - Thursday) is a glowing testimony to the diverse and wonderful nature of human history
You think that religious wars have killed more people than any other kind of war, even though the largest wars of the last 200 years (World War I and II, Civil War, etc.) had no discernable religious causes.
You think that the Spanish Inquisition killed millions (or at least hundreds of thousands), even though the population of all of Spain at the time of the Inquisition was only about five million, and the actual total killed numbers about 2000. When informed of this, you accuse the informer of belittling or being insensitive to the deaths of 2000 individuals.
You bring up the alleged 'horrors' of the Spanish Inquisition to show how evil the church is. When shown that the SI was not the horror that it was painted to be, you switch gears and ask if the believer notes this because they think people are justified to feel moral revulsion with the Spanish Inquisition as it is commonly understood.
In a coffee table conversation you hear religion represented in a positive light. You immediately start preaching about the Inquisition and the Crusades to put things back on track. After all, "we cannot allow a Divine Foot in the door".
You believe that Christians burned down the Great Library of Alexandria. When you learn that this was impossible, you assert that it is obvious that Christians did burn a lot of ancient books. When you are shown that this too is false, you wait a while, then make the same claim again, hoping that the person who corrected you with the facts won't notice.
You desperately confer with other skeptics to try and refute the evidence that Hitler's Holocaust was evolution-inspired, because, darn it, you just GOTTA prove that Hitler was a Christian.
You're convinced, despite evidence to the contrary, that Christianity was responsible for the Jewish holocaust because, dang it, that just SEEMS like something Christians would do.
You believe that Hitler claiming to be a Christian is undeniable proof that he was a Christian, while George Washington only claimed to be a Christian in order to win the people's favor.
You adamantly refuse to recognise the historical fact that "scientific atheism" was both a foundational philosophical position and an actual policy of the Soviet Union from the time of Lenin on, responsible for untold persecution, torture, suffering, humiliation and death far in excess of the numbers of the "victims" of Christianity.
On the other hand you further show your ignorance of history by constantly repeating "whoppers" about the numbers of victims of Christian Inquisitions, crusades and witchhunts dredged up from various unscholarly hate sites and passed off as historical fact.
For example...you can claim with a poker face that 9 MILLION women were put to death as witches by Christian fanatics in pre-Enlightenment Europe.
You assert that the 300 Protestants put to death under the reign of "Bloody Mary" in 16th century England stand as absolute proof of the inherent evil of Christianity but the tens upon tens of millions killed by Marxist regimes under Stalin, Mao and Pol Pot in the 20th century have absolutely NOTHING to do with the profound atheism inherent in these regimes.
You think that Pope Leo X may have really called Christ a fable, because it's "the type of thing he would say," but you deny that God could have said what the Bible attributes to Him because it is recorded by "anonymous" witnesses. You complain about desecrating the Koran while holding a burning Bible.
You think religion is "the original war crime".
You think the Ku Klux Klan and the Christian Identity movement are representative of "mainstream" Christianity.
You believe that "if it weren't for the U.S. Constitution, Christian leaders would be burning women at the stake."
You continually argue that Hitler was a "real Christian" even when he and his fellow Nazis were slaughtering millions of people (and you "conveniently" ignore the very obvious distinction between someone claiming to be a Christian and someone actually living as a Christian, and the fact that the Nuremberg prosecutors denounced Nazism as fanatically ANTI-Christian!), but you deny that the scientists who rejected Galileo's work were real scientists
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You insist that the historical data is too sparse to know anything about the ancient world, but you then proceed to tell us what 'actually happened' anyway
[Edited on 9/14/2008 10:07 AM]
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| Sep 14 @ 10:05 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,234
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You think religion is "the original war crime".
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| Sep 14 @ 10:07 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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16knots
Posts: 3,627
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Anything interesting happening today in the R&S threads?????
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| Sep 14 @ 10:09 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if
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bevrice
Posts: 11,145
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Yes, like I said, mom, it says just what some people in here say and do all the time.
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| Sep 14 @ 10:10 AM |
You are a fundy atheist (or Buddhist, or Spongite) if |
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sail_dancer
Posts: 8,495
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Bev has flipped out again!
Here we go again!
Uncontrolled posting of huge C&Ps without comments.
Rant! ..... Rant! ..... Rant!
Ignorance! ..... Ignorance! ..... Ignorance!
Peace
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page:
<<
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